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neighbour rant and advice!!

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Need to know where we stand... Next door haven't lived in the house yet (we've been here a year) and they started doing work there today- we did a complete house renovation last year- theyve started w… Read More
ellese Avatar
8m, 4w agoPosted 8 months, 4 weeks ago
Need to know where we stand... Next door haven't lived in the house yet (we've been here a year) and they started doing work there today- we did a complete house renovation last year- theyve started with the gardens, the 'builders' they have got in are complete and utter a$€*!! It started with an indirect comment between themselves about my dogs barking right infront of me, why they didnt just say to me i dont know. I changed my plans today so i could stay in and try keep them quiet (all the banging and the builders walking past the windows were setting them off) theyve moved my bins and put them right infront of my door, they tried to fit a digger down the joint alley way which actually hit our wall (theres also a full length window there and not sure what he hit) i went straight out and said to him that aint going to fit down there (i knew this as my partner tried last year) he said no it didnt ill argue the toss with you all day its up to me if i take it down there, and some other comment which i didn't catch because of the noise. He actually then didn't bother obviously realising it wasn't going to! The noise and mess im not bothered, we did the same last year but there is no need to be blatantly rude! The only big problem is the lady thats moving in is a police women! Do we confront her or leave it?? Ive stayed in all day with all windows and doors shut, Dreading them coming back tomorrow!
ellese Avatar
8m, 4w agoPosted 8 months, 4 weeks ago
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#1
Builders don't like being told they are wrong and don;t like people getting in the way when they are trying to do a job. Most have a very short temper and assume as soon as somebody complains about one thing then they will be a pain to work near. Despite all that they are usually very easy to get on your side as well. Take em a brew out and a pack of biscuits and they will be your best friend.
#2
If she's a policewoman then she will be used to being diplomatic, so just have a word with her when she gets home, but not in front of the builders. Tell her you don't mind the building work and noise but the builders were rude to you. I'm sure she won't mind you saying .
#3
Deaa
Builders don't like being told they are wrong and don;t like people getting in the way when they are trying to do a job. Most have a very short temper and assume as soon as somebody complains about one thing then they will be a pain to work near. Despite all that they are usually very easy to get on your side as well. Take em a brew out and a pack of biscuits and they will be your best friend.


My partners a builder and has his own company and are well known for been polite and friendly, i am the sort of person that would do that even if they are working on someone elses house! I was in a rush 1st thing when there was only 1 of them and when i got back I was going to ask if he wanted our stuff out the way but soon as i got out the car he made his indirect comment because he wasnt on his own so i thought no sod it you can move it!
#4
t_kaay
If she's a policewoman then she will be used to being diplomatic, so just have a word with her when she gets home, but not in front of the builders. Tell her you don't mind the building work and noise but the builders were rude to you. I'm sure she won't mind you saying .


Nobodys living there yet so it's only now and again shes there! Do you think if i put a note through the door would be ok?
#5
ellese
t_kaay
If she's a policewoman then she will be used to being diplomatic, so just have a word with her when she gets home, but not in front of the builders. Tell her you don't mind the building work and noise but the builders were rude to you. I'm sure she won't mind you saying .
Nobodys living there yet so it's only now and again shes there! Do you think if i put a note through the door would be ok?

Do they have access to the house? If so they'll probably read and threw it away themselves. I'd try and contact her directly if possible.
#6
Slate them on Facebook or other media sites , Just don't give any clue's that it is you or next door to you.
#7
if you don't mind the noise and keep yourself to yourself what can you possibly be dreading? enjoy your time and let them get on with it.
#8
I don't really know what you have to complain about unless they have done damage. Ok they moved your bins but it's not their fault your dogs bark at people. On the other hand I would not lift a finger to try and stop them barking as that's what they are there for I suspect.

I would leave it but if I saw the house owner I would mention how rude their workers have been to you this may affect their future employment.
#9
ellese
Deaa
Builders don't like being told they are wrong and don;t like people getting in the way when they are trying to do a job. Most have a very short temper and assume as soon as somebody complains about one thing then they will be a pain to work near. Despite all that they are usually very easy to get on your side as well. Take em a brew out and a pack of biscuits and they will be your best friend.
My partners a builder and has his own company and are well known for been polite and friendly, i am the sort of person that would do that even if they are working on someone elses house! I was in a rush 1st thing when there was only 1 of them and when i got back I was going to ask if he wanted our stuff out the way but soon as i got out the car he made his indirect comment because he wasnt on his own so i thought no sod it you can move it!
I get it, he was a d**k so you were a **** and now they are being more of a ****. That's going to carry on until one of you makes peace and since they were there first to be a **** it most likely wont be them. Its either that or speak to the woman and tell her to have a word but be prepared for a lot more 'indirect comments' as you pass.
#10
joshp
ellese
t_kaay
If she's a policewoman then she will be used to being diplomatic, so just have a word with her when she gets home, but not in front of the builders. Tell her you don't mind the building work and noise but the builders were rude to you. I'm sure she won't mind you saying .
Nobodys living there yet so it's only now and again shes there! Do you think if i put a note through the door would be ok?

Do they have access to the house? If so they'll probably read and threw it away themselves. I'd try and contact her directly if possible.


Not yet theyve only been in the gardens today not sure if they are going to be in the house! Dont know her name or anything, just that shes a copper!
#11
pvfc247
Slate them on Facebook or other media sites , Just don't give any clue's that it is you or next door to you.


Was going to but they didnt have a name on the van so no idea who they are!
#12
PulisOut
I don't really know what you have to complain about unless they have done damage. Ok they moved your bins but it's not their fault your dogs bark at people. On the other hand I would not lift a finger to try and stop them barking as that's what they are there for I suspect.

I would leave it but if I saw the house owner I would mention how rude their workers have been to you this may affect their future employment.


The bins they did just to be a pain, they knew i had a baby in the house as they saw her this morning so just made it a faff to get out the house. What annoyed me was the fact he hit my house with a digger while i was in! Then tried to deny it and be very rude about it!
#13
Whys it a problem that she is a police woman? If anything that should help as hopefully she will want to keep the peace. She probably has no idea they are being so rude and will have a word. I would also think that with her working for a big organisation, the builders would be hoping for some new word of mouth work. Try to have as little as possible to do with the builders, don't give them a chance to give you aggro but try to do a little covert filming for proof.
#14
jude7219
Whys it a problem that she is a police woman? If anything that should help as hopefully she will want to keep the peace. She probably has no idea they are being so rude and will have a word. I would also think that with her working for a big organisation, the builders would be hoping for some new word of mouth work. Try to have as little as possible to do with the builders, don't give them a chance to give you aggro but try to do a little covert filming for proof.


Dont want too p*** her off or be made out to be something im not before shes even moved in! Im going to say something when shes next there
#15
Personally I feel sorry for the policewoman. You sound like a nightmare to live next to.
banned#16
Unless they are building at night or too early in the morning there is nothing you can do.
#17
I dont understand the opening comment: "need to know where we stand"
....Just rude and annoying builders, you can explain that to neighbour nicely and hopefully she will have a word, end of!
#18
ellese
PulisOut
I don't really know what you have to complain about unless they have done damage. Ok they moved your bins but it's not their fault your dogs bark at people. On the other hand I would not lift a finger to try and stop them barking as that's what they are there for I suspect.
I would leave it but if I saw the house owner I would mention how rude their workers have been to you this may affect their future employment.
The bins they did just to be a pain, they knew i had a baby in the house as they saw her this morning so just made it a faff to get out the house. What annoyed me was the fact he hit my house with a digger while i was in! Then tried to deny it and be very rude about it!

If they are making things difficult for you, you can easily do the same for them at night, after they've gone home!
#19
What's you partner think of the work? Could be an opportunity here ;)
#20
To me this just sounds like change creating fear. If your dogs bark excessively then you can be reported for noise so yes I think it's a proactive approach to attempt to manage that, maybe her comment was in the context of oh no I work shifts and there are noisy dogs next door how will I get sufficient sleep with the noise maybe

It does sound as though you have taken immediate offense and are on the defensive - that's not a good place to be as it self promotes animosity. I'd recommend nipping it in the bud asap before it becomes a dispute and definitely do it in person and I wouldn't open with a complaint, maybe sandwich it with an opening compliment and ask some questions about her to show interest / develop a bond.

The fact she works within the law is irrespective as you don't know her character which is the most important factor, I've know lovely police and awful narcissistic police unless you're a drug or arms dealer I wouldn't have any concern
#21
show the police women the damage they have done to the brick work, i would also ask her around to discuss the way the builders are been with you.
#22
craigstephens
Personally I feel sorry for the policewoman. You sound like a nightmare to live next to.


Why?
#23
Wonderlust7
To me this just sounds like change creating fear. If your dogs bark excessively then you can be reported for noise so yes I think it's a proactive approach to attempt to manage that, maybe her comment was in the context of oh no I work shifts and there are noisy dogs next door how will I get sufficient sleep with the noise maybe

It does sound as though you have taken immediate offense and are on the defensive - that's not a good place to be as it self promotes animosity. I'd recommend nipping it in the bud asap before it becomes a dispute and definitely do it in person and I wouldn't open with a complaint, maybe sandwich it with an opening compliment and ask some questions about her to show interest / develop a bond.

The fact she works within the law is irrespective as you don't know her character which is the most important factor, I've know lovely police and awful narcissistic police unless you're a drug or arms dealer I wouldn't have any concern


The problem is with her builders not her, they were hanging around my front door where theres long windows so my dogs could see them! If an intruder was to break in through that door id prefer my dogs to bark!?
#24
With all the points I made you reply with defensive comments around your dogs. I really don't mean to be rude but I don't have the time or inclination to continue the conversation. I have given you my advice, take it or leave it.
#25
I wouldn't worry. As long as you are friendly, polite and reasonable she should be too.

ellese
jude7219
Whys it a problem that she is a police woman? If anything that should help as hopefully she will want to keep the peace. She probably has no idea they are being so rude and will have a word. I would also think that with her working for a big organisation, the builders would be hoping for some new word of mouth work. Try to have as little as possible to do with the builders, don't give them a chance to give you aggro but try to do a little covert filming for proof.
Dont want too p*** her off or be made out to be something im not before shes even moved in! Im going to say something when shes next there
#26
Doesn't sound like much of an issue unless there is actually damage to the house. They've made comments about your dogs barking, because they were, and you've chosen to take offence.

They probably wanted to test their digger down the alleyway just as you did. It could have been a different size to the one you tried previously. If your bins were in the way, it's not a big issue that they've moved them.

If they have caused damage to your house that is another issue, otherwise I think you have too much time on your hands
#27
Peter9588
Doesn't sound like much of an issue unless there is actually damage to the house. They've made comments about your dogs barking, because they were, and you've chosen to take offence.

They probably wanted to test their digger down the alleyway just as you did. It could have been a different size to the one you tried previously. If your bins were in the way, it's not a big issue that they've moved them.

If they have caused damage to your house that is another issue, otherwise I think you have too much time on your hands


According to the bloke driving the digger it DID fit down there, so its ok to just let him potentially smash our window thats down there? Its a full length window that the dogs can see and the builders were walking backwards and forwards past it and thats why they were barking! I cant help that they can see through the window just as much as they are entitled to walk up and down the alley!? They could have just said they were barking when i was getting out of the car but instead chose to have a dig. And if the digger was supposed to go down there why did he stop as soon as i said it wouldn't?! Because he knew it wasn't going to! It wasn't an issue they moved the bins (i would have done it for them!) the problem was that there is plenty of room to move the bins to but they chose to put them right on my door step. I don't have too much time on my hands at all either thanks im a childminder and. Ail technician that works from home as well as a mum and take my children to and from school! To quick to judge some people, without knowing the facts first
#28
Take a deep breath, relax and let go. You'll regret if you rub her on the wrong side and end up in her log book. Never take on people in power for flimsy reasons.

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