OK, sorry in advance for the story, but in a nutshell the missus has always had an R4 card and it works fine. She's replaced her DS, and now the card won't work on the new one. Other people's R4 cards don't work either, although they all work fine on other DS consoles, so that rules out the card being faulty.
So to cover all bases and to show willing, I've said I'll try to get her a different "brand" to see if that works. I've been put off from ordering from dealextreme with all of the "are they or aren't they fake" messages, and would prefer to deal with a human in the same country if possible!
I'd love it if it came with all of the necessary files on it **I'm not asking for games to be pre-loaded, just the firmware** and would be happy to pay reasonable costs. Payment preferably through paypal