A bit of light hearted fun, what are the funniest things friends or relatives have come out with (all 100% Genuine) - HotUKDeals
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A bit of light hearted fun, what are the funniest things friends or relatives have come out with (all 100% Genuine)

clondikemike Avatar
7y, 4m agoPosted 7 years, 4 months ago
Reason for the post was my Sister said to me today "So if England win the Cricket today, do they still have to play tomorrow"

2. My Ex-Mother in law asked me to get her a Cup of Chinno when we where in Starbucks a few years ago

3: My Aunt said "She didnt was to watch Close Encounters of the third kind as she hadnt seen the first two
clondikemike Avatar
7y, 4m agoPosted 7 years, 4 months ago
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#1
I asked my brother if the M25 only went around one way, so if you got on at junction 6 and wanted to get off at 5 I thought you had to go right the way round. I'd heard what a nightmare it was so I thought that might have been the reason.
I also stupidly asked where they get the money for the lottery if you win, it was one of those times when I opened my mouth before thinking and have never lived it down. Oops.
banned 1 Like #2
lol i can only think of one thing...

on deal or no deal, there was a guy there a while back with a turban on... and my 2 year old sister said look, a genie. lmao
1 Like #3
Hmm... I told someone recently that if they were gonna gag me they better use good quality chlorophyll.

And I asked if Carlisle was in Wales....

Yes, I know I'm not MEANT to be that stupid :p
#4
DangerGod
lol i can only think of one thing...

on deal or no deal, there was a guy there a while back with a turban on... and my 2 year old sister said look, a genie. lmao


awww thats sweet x x x
#5
when i was 15 i tried to convince my parents that they were drunk, not me :lol:
#6
I was serving dinner and the kids were talking about their teachers.. and I wanted them to be quiet and eat their dinner but I got all muddled up and told them.. " Hush now. Eat your teacher".

They've never let me live that one down :p
#7
I have a small birthmark.

My step-sister asked me if it was a birthmark.

I said yes.

She asked how long I'd had it :?

I replied that I'd had it since birth??!!?!?!?!?
banned#8
nikkib123
At at time when I did not eat meat, my mother-in-law saying it was ok to eat a CHEESEburger!

(you had to be there!!!)


no wayyyyyy :w00t:
banned#9
suzyerogers
I have a small birthmark.

My step-sister asked me if it was a birthmark.

I said yes.

She asked how long I'd had it :?

I replied that I'd had it since birth??!!?!?!?!?


:| :lol:
#10
i was telling my mum that one of the teachers she worked with was asking after her she couldnt remember him so i am saying to her
.. you remember he was tall and thin and she says no this went on for ages til she was getting annoyed and says to me i dont know anyone called Tom Fin! tall and thin!
1 Like #11
one time my gran came into the room and started talking to my jacket thinking it was me, she was blind as a bat !
#12
micoo
when i was 15 i tried to convince my parents that they were drunk, not me :lol:


I can so believe this.

All men do this... late night phone calls... Heyyyyyyyyyyy babyyyyy.. no nooo im not dwunk... *hic* and I lub you......
#13
ClarityofMind
Hmm... I told someone recently that if they were gonna gag me they better use good quality chlorophyll.

And I asked if Carlisle was in Wales....

Yes, I know I'm not MEANT to be that stupid :p


Pmsl, :-D
banned#14
cribert
one time my gran came into the room and started talking to my jacket thinking it was me, she was blind as a bat !


hahaha repped!!
1 Like #15
my gran said to me one day out of the blue "have you ever ben to stranrar?"

i replied "no, why?"

she said " Don't it's a bit of a hole"

:lol:
#16
cribert
one time my gran came into the room and started talking to my jacket thinking it was me, she was blind as a bat !


omg, I remember my Gran stayed over one night and she slept in my brothers room... thing is my brother went out got drunk and totally forgot gran was staying over and couldnt quite understand why there was an old woman beating him round the head when he tried to slip naked into bed.
#17
DangerGod
lol i can only think of one thing...

on deal or no deal, there was a guy there a while back with a turban on... and my 2 year old sister said look, a genie. lmao


Lol, you innocence of youth:thumbsup: and look what we grow up like sometimes:x
#18
ClarityofMind
I can so believe this.

All men do this... late night phone calls... Heyyyyyyyyyyy babyyyyy.. no nooo im not dwunk... *hic* and I lub you......


sooo true!
#19
micoo
when i was 15 i tried to convince my parents that they were drunk, not me :lol:


Excellent:-D
#20
When I was a child apparently I asked my dad if birds have duvets :oops:
#21
suzyerogers
I have a small birthmark.

My step-sister asked me if it was a birthmark.

I said yes.

She asked how long I'd had it :?

I replied that I'd had it since birth??!!?!?!?!?


:-D, my niece did ask me a couple of years ago if i "still had my tattoo":)
#22
livingthelife07
When I was a child apparently I asked my dad if birds have duvets :oops:


hmmm when I was younger I was getting "friendly" with someone in a park and suddenly a kid runs up and says, "mista, I wanna look at your cack" of course he meant CLOCK but he wasnt to know what I'd been doing 5 seconds earlier and was hiding with my body and YES I know it was irresponsible :p
#23
cribert
one time my gran came into the room and started talking to my jacket thinking it was me, she was blind as a bat !


:-D:-D, i already love your Gran:thumbsup:
#24
my brother had just finished playing on football manager and he saved it and turned it off by the button on the tower. My mum (frollickingfrill) then went up to it and said 'What's happened to this?'

This was made even funnier because she was ill and had been going round the house wearing a dressing gown half asleep so me and my brother were joking that she was a mentle patient.

And on the same day.

She asked me and my brother.

Have you seen my soothers?

(and me being funny pretending she was a mentle patient) I said:

'are you sure you bought them'

and she replied
'No!'

I was rolling around on the floor for minutes.
1 Like #25
When my 2 were about 3 and 5 I had just washed all the paint work down including the door frames, only for one of them to run in from the garden with dirty hands and my instant reaction was to shout " get your *ucky mingers off my door frames":? Thank god they were to young to understand what I was saying:roll:
#26
cribert
one time my gran came into the room and started talking to my jacket thinking it was me, she was blind as a bat !


Reminds me of when my Grandad's (RIP) house phone started ringing and he answered his remote LOLZ!

Also, my Sister in Law told me she thought scotland was in England and she didn't know how we get rain (she's 22)

Will probs be back with more...
#27
oh boys r so cruel to their mothers lol xxx
#28
Angelstar
oh boys r so cruel to their mothers lol xxx


*goes off to slap BL and send him to his room !!!
#29
cribert
one time my gran came into the room and started talking to my jacket thinking it was me, she was blind as a bat !


awww, that made me laugh so hard, :lol::lol::lol:
#30
My daughter came in the other day saying that she was really annoyed cos she had scrapped her wheel trims. She said " It must have been a high kerb cos its at the top!!!":roll:
#31
frollickingfrill
*goes off to slap BL and send him to his room !!!

u do that hun pmsl xxx :thumbsup:
#32
My mum came in one day when i was younger singing "we are the w*****s", "we are the w*****s""???? myself and my brother asked "PLEASE STOP SINGING THAT" and asked her why she was, she said "some kids were riding down our road singing it", she didnt have a clue what it meant!!!!
#33
jellybaby22
my daughter thought that at night you said your prayers to santa clause.....when I told her it was god...she said thats rubbish he doesnt bring you any presents......:giggle:


:-D
#34
Just asked my mum if she had any luck on the lottery this weekend read out the winning numbers, when I asked how many numbers did you get her reply was oh I have got 6 numbers on my ticket..
yes mum every ticket has 6 numbers..
#35
livingthelife07
Just asked my mum if she had any luck on the lottery this weekend read out the winning numbers, when I asked how many numbers did you get her reply was oh I have got 6 numbers on my ticket..
yes mum every ticket has 6 numbers..


:-D
#36
Last year just before Xmas, my Gran was in hospital we brought in some earphones for her to watch the hospital TV because she said the headphones she had were uncomfortable. We gave her the earphones and she put the adaptar end of the earphone in her ear and said 'How does this work?'

I was lol'ing for ages.
1 Like #37
borolad94;6096615
Last year just before Xmas, my Gran was in hospital we brought in some earphones for her to watch the hospital TV because she said the headphones she had were uncomfortable. We gave her the earphones and she put the adaptar end of the earphone in her ear and said 'How does this work?'

I was lol'ing for ages.


:lol:
#38
After a hard day shopping me, my mum and my daughter (then about 5) went to maccie d's. my daughter said she wanted to go toilet, so I pointed her to the door and she walked across, stopped and shouted.......



"will you come and wipe my bum cuz I'm going for a poo!!"


yes, I did wish the earth would swallow me.
#39
Sparker14
My daughter came in the other day saying that she was really annoyed cos she had scrapped her wheel trims. She said " It must have been a high kerb cos its at the top!!!":roll:


Ha ha I like that!!
#40
ChipSticks
After a hard day shopping me, my mum and my daughter (then about 5) went to maccie d's. my daughter said she wanted to go toilet, so I pointed her to the door and she walked across, stopped and shouted.......



"will you come and wipe my bum cuz I'm going for a poo!!"


yes, I did wish the earth would swallow me.

oh nooooooooooooo, typical thing for a child to do

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