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advice regarding work and personal life

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serious replys only please! and dont judge me on this either. last friday i went to a lass from works house party and one of the fellas from work was there. one thing lead to another and you know w… Read More
donnaraine Avatar
7y, 3m agoPosted 7 years, 3 months ago
serious replys only please! and dont judge me on this either.

last friday i went to a lass from works house party and one of the fellas from work was there. one thing lead to another and you know what. also on monday i went over his for the night. hes now said he would like to see me when we are both of work next week before he goes on holiday.
thing is i work in a care home and the lass whos house it was has told everyone and one of the residents has found out. he keeps saying sly comments and fishing for information from us and other staff. hes said that the manager is going to be discussing the matter with us at some point.
my question is can i get into trouble for what i do out of work with another member of staff? surely if i want to start seeing someone from work it shouldnt be a problem unless it affects the way we work, which it isnt. also me or him werent the ones who told people and therefor cant be held accountable for this resident finding out? its doing my head in cos the gossips are loving it. hes also text me saying hes had them going on at him tonight.
i dont want to upset anyone from work or put my job on the line. but as far as im aware we havent done anything wrong?
donnaraine Avatar
7y, 3m agoPosted 7 years, 3 months ago
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#1
Gossips are loving it? So why bring it here then? More gossips here than anywhere.
#2
hey donna - i dont see it as you doing anything wrong - as you say as long as it doesnt affect yours or his personal work why should it matter. x
#3
You're totally right. What you get up to away from work is your business. As long as, like you say, it doesn't affect your work environment then carry on and make yourself happy. :thumbsup:
#4
deek72
Gossips are loving it? So why bring it here then? More gossips here than anywhere.


cos yous dont personally know me :thumbsup:
banned#5
I would have been disciplined lots in the past :-D
banned#6
deek72
Gossips are loving it? So why bring it here then? More gossips here than anywhere.


I agree, how are you? :thumbsup:
#7
What does your contract state about workplace relationships?
#8
its got naff all to do with work what goes on in your private life
banned#9
dirty stop out!! only joking. your manager wont tell you off dont worry
banned#10
the porter
are u a good girl now DLM?


At the moment.

Why do you want to corrupt me? :p
#11
vikkiwathall
hey donna - i dont see it as you doing anything wrong - as you say as long as it doesnt affect yours or his personal work why should it matter. x


hi chick!

my boss can be a right nasty woman when she gets going, i could actually see her saying we cant see each other out of work unless one of us quits! im just worried its going to put a strain on my working relationship with her or even make me lose my job. arrghhhhh so stressed!!!
#12
thesaint
What does your contract state about workplace relationships?


this^^^
#13
donnaraine
cos yous dont personally know me :thumbsup:


Ah, I see. You bring it here because I don't personally know you. Right, :?

DLM
I agree, how are you? :thumbsup:


Great thanks DLM. Just getting a little disillusioned of late. Fewer nice people on here than I thought, that's all.
#14
theyre only fishing to brighten up their sad little lives tbh, but as long as it doesnt affect your work (why should it!) you have no grounds to worry
#15
thesaint
What does your contract state about workplace relationships?


tbh i dont think theres anything in there about it, not int he copy i recieved anyway. might be in the bigger file at work though but its trying to catch a peek without being caught
#16
donnaraine
tbh i dont think theres anything in there about it, not int he copy i recieved anyway. might be in the bigger file at work though but its trying to catch a peek without being caught


your entitled to look at it if you want to
#17
mrcareful
theyre only fishing to brighten up their sad little lives tbh, but as long as it doesnt affect your work (why should it!) you have no grounds to worry


it wouldnt affect it at all, weve done 3 nightshifts together this week, on separate floors but still!
banned#18
tell the guy in the carehome his days are numbered (serious)
#19
Why don't you ask your manager about your "friends" HYPOTHETICAL relationship with someone else at work? :whistling:
#20
donnaraine
tbh i dont think theres anything in there about it, not int he copy i recieved anyway. might be in the bigger file at work though but its trying to catch a peek without being caught


You will have a full and complete copy of your contract, they can't have a confidential section that you've agreed to. :?
#21
angelfairee
Why don't you ask your manager about your "friends" HYPOTHETICAL relationship with someone else at work? :whistling:


I have a 'hypothetical' relationship with you. :-D
#22
angelfairee
Why don't you ask your manager about your "friends" HYPOTHETICAL relationship with someone else at work? :whistling:


cos she will know about us already, im in with her on sunday so will see how she acts with me
#23
thesaint
You will have a full and complete copy of your contract, they can't have a confidential section that you've agreed to. :?


so they cant refer to anything that i dont have a copy of myself? cos i just recieved my contract the other night and it never said anything in there. i havent signed it yet though :oops:
#24
bykergrove
dirty stop out!! only joking. your manager wont tell you off dont worry


:w00t: im normally a good girl!!! im anything but a dirty stop out :p
#25
deek72
I have a 'hypothetical' relationship with you. :-D


Haha. I hope you've read the contract.

donnaraine
cos she will know about us already, im in with her on sunday so will see how she acts with me


If she already knows then you might as well just ask her if it affects you from an employment perspective and then go from there.
#26
donnaraine
:w00t: im normally a good girl!!! im anything but a dirty stop out :p


Don't let him call you a dirty stop out, he dates girls and then goes for their mothers!
banned#27
the porter
you cant corrupt someone as angelic as you :whistling:


My wings are a little crooked :-D
#28
angelfairee
Don't let him call you a dirty stop out, he dates girls and then goes for their mothers!


what a naughty boy!
#29
donnaraine
hi chick!

my boss can be a right nasty woman when she gets going, i could actually see her saying we cant see each other out of work unless one of us quits! im just worried its going to put a strain on my working relationship with her or even make me lose my job. arrghhhhh so stressed!!!


She should just shove off - its your life - so what if your seeing him - unless it says in your contract u cannot see another staff member she aint got a leg to stand on x
#30
donnaraine
so they cant refer to anything that i dont have a copy of myself? cos i just recieved my contract the other night and it never said anything in there. i havent signed it yet though :oops:


You are in a better position having not signed it, but they may "frown" against workplace relationships.

You say how happy you are etc, but they don't care about that.
It's when the relationship fails is when the fun at work begins.
#31
angelfairee
Haha. I hope you've read the contract.
.


I wrote the contact myself. Here it is:

1. Feel free to do whatever you want in this 'hypothetical' relationship.
2. Refer to rule No.1.
#32
angelfairee
Haha. I hope you've read the contract.



If she already knows then you might as well just ask her if it affects you from an employment perspective and then go from there.


its a good idea, but its plucking up the nerves to ask her. actually the deputy is back on next week shes great so i might just have a word with her. it would be easier if i knew i was definetly going to start seeing the guy lol as its verrryyy early days atm
#33
thesaint
You are in a better position having not signed it, but they may "frown" against workplace relationships.

You say how happy you are etc, but they don't care about that.
It's when the relationship fails is when the fun at work begins.


This is true. Relationships with colleagues = rubbish.

deek72
I wrote the contact myself. Here it is:

1. Feel free do do whatever you want in this 'hypothetical' relationship.
2. Refer to rule No.1.


I like it.
#34
dont 'do it' at work then you'll be fine i expect :lol:
#35
donnaraine
its a good idea, but its plucking up the nerves to ask her. actually the deputy is back on next week shes great so i might just have a word with her. it would be easier if i knew i was definetly going to start seeing the guy lol as its verrryyy early days atm


I thought you've already been nailed? :thinking:
#36
thesaint
I thought you've already been nailed? :thinking:


thats what i thought, early days for me is going out...meal etc, think im getting old :w00t:
banned#37
the porter
really? is it possible they could get crookider if there is such a word?:)


Probably :p
#38
thesaint
I thought you've already been nailed? :thinking:


yeah i have :oops:

but he keeps mentioning seeing me out of work so who knows what will happen?
#39
thesaint
I thought you've already been nailed? :thinking:


How very eloquent.
banned#40
thesaint
I thought you've already been nailed? :thinking:


Nailing and dating are two different things :p

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