Any advice on how to deal with a lazy 18 year old please?
Hi guys, I have an 18 year old who by all accounts from his school is about to epically fail all his A'levels. This isn't new, his school have been warning us all year and we have been working with them to try to cajole/beg/motivate him to put in more effort. He is a highly intelligent child who is more than capable of getting excellent results and his father and I have struggled hard and gone without to pay for him to have a private school education in the hope that he will go on to get a good degree and a good job. He has offers at 3 top universities based on his previous results but it seems that there is virtually no chance of his achieving the required grades this year to go to any of them, if even passing any of the exams. He insists that he does want to go to university but all he seems to care about at the moment is working as many hours as possible at his part time job so that he can have money to go out with his mates. Up until the past 12 months he very rarely went out and even now respect is not a problem, he does not swear or shout or bring any trouble to the door, he just will not put any effort into his school work at all. If we insist that he does not go out or to work he will sit in his room on the internet or instant messaging (supposed to be working). He seems to think that if he fails then he can just take a gap year, do a bit of college and retake for entry next year but both his father and I are determined that if he fails to get into university this year then he must get himself a full time job immediately and not sit at home doing nothing and claiming benefits. We don't care if it's picking up rubbish, stacking shelves or cleaning toilets as long as he doesn't think that he's going to carry on living the easy life. We also intend to make him pay the going rate in rent etc even if that takes most of his wages. I would very much welcome other peoples advice if they have been through similar or just other peoples opinions about 1) are we planning to be too hard on him (or not hard enough) and 2) what is the going rate for an 18/19 year old to pay in rent etc? Thanks x
Tips for a lazy 35 year old also please. ;-)