I saw these quotes in one of the books that I just finished reading and thought I'd show it to you guys:
500 Reasons Why ... I Hate The Office by Malcom Burgess
Meeting the Chief Executive, reason 1:
If he ignores you in the corridor, you feel devastated. If he calls you by someone else's name, you think you have the personality of an amoeba. If he remembers your name, you assume you must be on the next redundancy hit list. No, you can't win.
Team Buidling, reason 3:
Essiential skills every team-building activity develops include sharing (usually one kit kat among twenty people); leadership (one person volunteers to contact the international Court of Human Rights); strategic thinking (going to the pub while two middle managers fight about who found the treasure); creativity (going to a shop and buying a raft); and lateral thinking (throwin a sickie.)
Teamwork, reason 4:
A team isn't a team if team leaders aren't busy learning new motivational skills (mainly, 'do this, or you're sacked'). Only don't complain - otherwise you'll be told you're not a teamplayer and forced to go on an arts-based training course, role-playing Henry V with you as a soldier. guess who gets to die first ...
Yes, We Have No Bananas, reason 3:
Reinventing - We're supposed to be continually reinventing our product/company/selves. but we're also told not to reinvent the wheel because - as our boss says in his best 'can't do' voice - 'if it ain't broke, don't fix it'. We just wish they'd make up their minds.