Brothers on Drugs - HotUKDeals
We use cookie files to improve site functionality and personalisation. By continuing to use HUKD, you accept our cookie and privacy policy.
Get the HUKD app free at Google Play

Search Error

An error occurred when searching, please try again!

Login / Sign UpSubmit

Brothers on Drugs

mattb_1987 Avatar
8y, 8m agoPosted 8 years, 8 months ago
I am a 20 year old student who works as well as studies and i have two brothers who sit on their backsides all day and smoke cannabis.
I got them both a job where I work and they both quit within 3 weeks because they cant be bothered. They contribute nothing to anything in the house and are 2 theiving little b******s. They steal from my moms bank account, smash up her house, and sell stuff from her house to cash converters. Only the other day they took a load of DVD's, which i have to work for to buy for myself, and flogged them off for a fraction of their value.
It is a living nightmare being around them but i have nowhere else i can go. My mom will not throw them out, but we are suffering because of her decision.
Firstly, would anybody on here throw their children out for this? They are 17 and 19 so old enough to know better. In my opinion i couldnt care less what happens to them coz i hate them with a passion.
Im trying to get my own place but so far this is proving unsuccessful.
Secondly does anyone have any ideas to persuade my mom to kick them out? They have done everything imaginable and even the police havent done anything about it!
mattb_1987 Avatar
8y, 8m agoPosted 8 years, 8 months ago
Options

All Comments

(31) Jump to unreadPost a comment
Comments/page:
#1
Aww poor you, you sound like a mature level headed young man.

Yes I would throw them out, and make sure they got a job and then also paid you back.

Wait for all your answers on here, print it off then give it to your Mum.
Maybe she'll see sense
#2
first off, I would take their photos to cash generators and the like, and advise them not to do deals with them, as the items are stolen, even game and gamestation.

And I would personaly just look for somwhere else to live. your local council may be able to help you find somewhere.
#3
Well to be honest i am being driven insane by them, I am trying to do well for myself but life is hell at home. Im going to end up with nothing left at home because it will get to the point where there is nothing left for them to take
#4
If its your stuff they are nicking to sell then you could report them for theft yourself and have them charged, as you know they are taking the stuff to cash converters that can be easily proven as they have to show ID before they will buy plus the fact they have security cameras, everything they buy in is recorded who they bought what off, time, date, amount, ID used etc etc.
#5
Im with you mate, and yes if my son was like that i would either take him away and try to get him clean by dumping him in a country he knows nothing about or cant speak the language but i appreciate this is not practical for the majority of people.
I used to have a friend like that, his dad used to beat the living daylights out of him, but it changed nothing, thankfully he took an overdose and is dead now, a horrible thing to say i know, but if you lived near him you would have agreed it was far better for all.
#6
It's probably best if you can find your own space and then it's up to you whether you let them into it or not. Unfortunately you can't tell your Mum how to treat them or deal with the situation, she has to come to that decision on her own.
It's a horrible situation but you just have to rise above it as best you can. Good luck!
banned#7
how sad, a mothers love can be blind or maybe she just cant be doing with the hassle, maybe its easier to know and accept the for what they are than to deal with them, i really do feel for you and the only advise i can offer is to get out, good luck with whatever happens, and there is always many on here that may not be able to help but will always listen xx
#8
What about moving into a shared house/student flat? You could maybe do it cheaply and apply for support from union etc
#9
This really is a difficult problem, you must be going through pure hell living with this and as for your mum well my heart really does go out to her as being a mum myself I know how much she must love them, and how painful it must be to be treated in this way by your own sons ... it must be double the heartache for her. There must be somewhere that can help you ? have you tried looking on the net for a support group or the like ? You shouldn't have to deal with this situation on your own & I wish you all the luck in the world.
#10
percevere with your studies, even try getting to college or uni away from them and take out loans etc to fund it, trust me it will be worth it in th end even if you get 20k in debt with it, you cant forefit your future
#11
Kitten13;1707309
first off, I would take their photos to cash generators and the like, and advise them not to do deals with them, as the items are stolen, even game and gamestation.


I wouldnt as these places keep a record of people they buy from and would make a theft charge easier to prove, by doing as you say you will drive them to sell to a more questionable market where it will be harder to prove, also they would be likely to receive less cash from each item thus making them steal even more items!!
#12
harlzter
I wouldnt as these places keep a record of people they buy from and would make a theft charge easier to prove, by doing as you say you will drive them to sell to a more questionable market where it will be harder to prove, also they would be likely to receive less cash from each item thus making them steal even more items!!


Exactly what i was thinking. At least at these places i can get the stuff back. Its a lose lose situation really. Iv been to the police several times and the charge imposed was a fine which my mom had to pay off for my then 16 year old brother
#13
plenty of *good jobs in the army -discipline and respect is a finge benefit.

Cannon Fodder needed:

http://www.army.mod.uk/

Shima
#14
Another of my problems is i really dont want to leave my mom to cope with this single handedly but at the end of the day this is what she is choosing to cope with. They have no desire to get off the drugs and even my dad wont have them near his house. They respect him however, more than my mom who wipes their backsides
#15
shimagoza
plenty of *good jobs in the army -discipline and respect is a finge benefit.

Cannon Fodder needed:

http://www.army.mod.uk/

Shima


you have got to be joking. they can hardly move from their seats unless they want something
#16
As it's just cannabis use it will hopefully be something they grow out of.Is your mum allowing them to smoke weed in the home? If so she needs to nip this in the bud(no pun intended)
Cannabis use by itslef does not necessarily lead to further drug abuse(I know many weed smokers,and that is all they do,and lead very productive lives at the same time) but by being in contact with those who supply weed it is much easier to get hold of other drugs,your mum needs to know this and not be so lenient on this issue.
Cannabis use also makes you lazy,not that 17 and 19 year olds need any other excuses anyway(not all,I hasten to add),so explains somewhat their lack of wanting to do and contribute anything.

All you can try to do is lead by example,which is what you are doing.This doesn't make things easier for you I know,but hopefully they will soon realise there is little to be gained in the long term by their current lifestyle.Sit tight and put everything into finding your own place,desist from buying sellable stuff until you know it can be secured.

Not much help,but good luck and keep strong xxxx
#17
Feel sorry for u dude but at the end of the day your mother is an adult and can make her own decisions. get the hell out of there as soon as you can and good luck
How about asking your dad if u can stay with him?
#18
muckypup
As it's just cannabis use it will hopefully be something they grow out of.Is your mum allowing them to smoke weed in the home? If so she needs to nip this in the bud(no pun intended)
Cannabis use by itslef does not necessarily lead to further drug abuse(I know many weed smokers,and that is all they do,and lead very productive lives at the same time) but by being in contact with those who supply weed it is much easier to get hold of other drugs,your mum needs to know this and not be so lenient on this issue.
Cannabis use also makes you lazy,not that 17 and 19 year olds need any other excuses anyway(not all,I hasten to add),so explains somewhat their lack of wanting to do and contribute anything.

All you can try to do is lead by example,which is what you are doing.This doesn't make things easier for you I know,but hopefully they will soon realise there is little to be gained in the long term by their current lifestyle.Sit tight and put everything into finding your own place,desist from buying sellable stuff until you know it can be secured.

Not much help,but good luck and keep strong xxxx


She doesnt as such allow them to, they just do it anyway regardless of what she says. They do not have one shred of respect for her
#19
Send them to this site then (jeez!)
www.FREE-GANJA.com

Shima
#20
maddogb
Feel sorry for u dude but at the end of the day your mother is an adult and can make her own decisions. get the hell out of there as soon as you can and good luck
How about asking your dad if u can stay with him?


My dad is re-married and i dont think she would allow it to be honest. If it was my dad on his own then i think it would be ok. He lives 50 miles away however, and i have a girlfriend down here in brum
#21
mattb_1987
She doesnt as such allow them to, they just do it anyway regardless of what she says. They do not have one shred of respect for her

They don't respect her because she is too soft on them!

Harsh but true.My OH used to work for many years in housing projects for disaffected young people,lazy assed bandits,weed smokers the lot of them.They responded to order and discipline,despite being abusive at the time it was dished out,they do respond.This is what you mum needs to do,set clear boundaries and consequences if they are broken.......AND STICK TO THEM.
#22
muckypup
They don't respect her because she is too soft on them!

Harsh but true.My OH used to work for many years in housing projects for disaffected young people,lazy assed bandits,weed smokers the lot of them.They responded to order and discipline,despite being abusive at the time it was dished out,they do respond.This is what you mum needs to do,set clear boundaries and consequences if they are broken.......AND STICK TO THEM.


That is true, theres nothing i can do to change the way she is though, i suppose all i can do is get out
#23
Thanks for everybodys posts anyway, im gonna keep trying to get somewhere. All the best to everybody
#24
I'd see if you could move in to a friend's house for a while - tell your Mum that your brothers are driving you mad & that you need some space. hopefully after a short spell on her own with them she might start agreeing with you.

I'd also move as many as my personal belongings to a friend's house as well, so that they can't get their hands on them to sell them.
#25
give them a good old fashioned older brother beating!
#26
Get a lock for your room.
And even a mini-safe for valuables (jewellery/cash/cards)

THEN

Raid their rooms, sure they have TV's or something, and get your stuff back.
Only do this after securing your own room though.
#27
keep stealing their weed,

or when they have just had a couple of bongs each and the rooms a stinking phone the police and tell them to pop over.

Get a lock on your door as said above first mind!
#28
by thema 1 way ticket toamsterdam - they will love it and wont want to come home.
#29
Hi matt. I have seen lots of lives destryed by this. First cannabis, and then....
Try to put your mum in touch with a dependent's support group. This will hopefully help her to see what she can do, give her support and also get some help to your brothers. Good luck!
#30
Ok cannabis isnt the culprit here. Ive a respectable job working with people on a daily basis, yet come home and get high. Understandably some people go on to other drugs. But you could say smoking fags leads to this, drinking alcohol and even socialising.

Blaming something other than their own lazyness or stupidity is also giving the culprits an excuse too. :thumbsup:
banned#31
cornish
Ok cannabis isnt the culprit here. Ive a respectable job working with people on a daily basis, yet come home and get high. Understandably some people go on to other drugs. But you could say smoking fags leads to this, drinking alcohol and even socialising.

Blaming something other than their own lazyness or stupidity is also giving the culprits an excuse too. :thumbsup:


i agree to an extent, not everything will have the same affect on each person

Post a Comment

You don't need an account to leave a comment. Just enter your email address. We'll keep it private.

...OR log in with your social account

...OR comment using your social account

Thanks for your comment! Keep it up!
We just need to have a quick look and it will be live soon.
The community is happy to hear your opinion! Keep contributing!