Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross. Just never his own.
Chuck Norris doesn't go hunting as it implies the possibility of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.
Chuck Norris can burn a DVD by just staring at the underside for 7 seconds.
Chuck Norris once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell him there was a stripper in it.
Chuck Norris survived abortion.
Once a grizzly bear threatened to eat Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris showed the bear his fist and the bear proceeded to eat himself, because it would be the less painful way to die...
Chuck Norris doesnt have any pubic hair. Pubes dont grow on steel.
Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost.
The Black Eyed Peas were just The Peas until Chuck Norris heard their music.
Chuck Norris does not wear a condom because there is no such thing as protection from Chuck Norris.