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Cockney Thread

Blanco Avatar
9y, 7m agoPosted 9 years, 7 months ago
So I'm heading down to london and I need to polish up on my cockney. Could someone be so kind as to teach my some cockney so I don't look foolish. Thanks.
Blanco Avatar
9y, 7m agoPosted 9 years, 7 months ago
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#1
Easy, Listen to C32..........................................

Or Eastenders, Although Not everyone talks and acts like that!!, A lot of south London is full of posh snobs!!
#2
I see... fingers crossed that I can understand what is being said!

You are the mutts nuts!
#3
Blanco
I see... fingers crossed that I can understand what is being said!

mutts nuts!


Where are you from then?

Not everyone speaks like Del Boy or Eastenders!!
#4
Midlands =)
#5
Blanco
Midlands =)


Brummie?

I understand most accents fine, Well except Scottish or heavy Northern Irish!

I am a southerner though! :giggle:
#7
I use all of these!!, Does that mean i'm cockney? :

* "Let's have a butchers at that magazine" (butcher's hook = look)
* "You're a berk!" (berkshire hunt = ****)
* "I haven't heard a dicky bird about it" (dickie bird = word)
* "Use your loaf and think next time" (loaf of bread = head)
* "Did you half-inch that car?" (half-inch = pinch, meaning steal)
* "You will have to speak up, he's a bit mutton" (mutt'n'jeff = deaf)
* "I'm going on my tod" (tod sloan = alone, or own)
* "Are you telling porkies?" (porkies = pork pies = lies)
* "Are you going to rabbit all night?" (rabbit and pork = talk)
* "Scarper lads!, The police are coming" (scarpa flow = go)

I use the words not in the same expressions though!
#8
I could also say the different pronunciations of the swear words.

But I doubt you'll be needing them!
#9
Iom-RF
I use all of these!!, Does that mean i'm cockney? :


* "Are you going to rabbit all night?" (rabbit and pork = talk)


I use the words not in the same expressions though!


You know it doesn't matter what way I try and say that it doesn't rhyme :thinking:
#10
Just don't call anyone a James Blunt!
#11
peteivy
Just don't call anyone a James Blunt!


Or in cockney a "cant!".
#12
yeah, they might chuck you down the apples and pears!
#13
peteivy
yeah, they might chuck you down the apples and pears!


Or a good kick in the loaf!! :-D
#14
A
Abergavenny ............................. Penny
Ace Of Spades ........................... AIDS
Acker Bilk .............................. Milk
Adam And Eve ............................ Believe
Adam And The Ants ....................... Pants
Airs And Graces ......................... Braces
Airs And Graces ......................... Faces
Airs And Graces ......................... Races
Alan Minter ............................. Splinter
Alan Whickers ........................... Knickers
Alderman's Nail ......................... Tail
All Afloat .............................. Coat
All Time Loser .......................... Boozer (Heavy Drinker)
Allan Border ............................ Out Of Order
Alligator ............................... Later
Almond Rock ............................. Frock
Almond Rocks ............................ Socks
Alphonse ................................ Ponce
Andy Cain ............................... Rain
Andy McNab .............................. Cab (Taxi)
Anna Maria .............................. Fire
Apple Core .............................. Score (Twenty Pounds)
Apple Fritter ........................... Bitter (Beer)
Apples And Pears ........................ Stairs
April Fool .............................. Stool
April Fool .............................. Tool
April Fools ............................. Football Pools
April Showers ........................... Flowers
Aris .................................... Arse
Aristotle ............................... Bottle
Army And Navy ........................... Gravy
Artful Dodger ........................... Lodger
Arthur Ashe ............................. Cash
Arthur Bliss ............................ ****
Arthur Scargill ......................... Gargle (Drink)
Ascot Races ............................. Braces
Ash And Oaks ............................ Smokes (Cigarettes)
Auntie Ella ............................. Umbrella
Auntie Nellie ........................... Belly
Ave Maria ............................... Fire
Aylesbury Duck .......................... ****
Ayrton Senna ............................ Tenner (Ten Pound Note)
#15
B
Baa Lamb ................................ Tram
Babbling Brook .......................... Cook
Babbling Brook .......................... Crook (Criminal)
Baby Giraffe ............................ Half (A Pint)
Bacardi Breezer ......................... Geezer
Back And Front .......................... ****
Bacon And Eggs .......................... Legs
Baked Potato ............................ Later
Ball Of Chalk ........................... Walk
Balloon Car ............................. Saloon Bar
Band Of Hope ............................ Soap
Bangers And Mash ........................ Cash
Barclays Bank ........................... Wa*k
Barn Owl ................................ Row (Quarrel)
Barnaby Rudge ........................... Judge
Barnet Fair ............................. Hair
Barney Rubble ........................... Trouble
Barry White ............................. Shi*e
Basil Fawlty ............................ Balti
Basin Of Gravy .......................... Baby
Bat And Wicket .......................... Ticket
Bath Bun ................................ Son
Bath Bun ................................ Sun
Battle Cruiser .......................... Boozer (Bar)
Battle Of Waterloo ...................... Stew
Bear's Paw .............................. Saw
Beechams Pill ........................... Bill (Statement)
Beechams Pill ........................... Still
Bees And Honey .......................... Money
Beetles And Ants ........................ Underpants
Beggar Boy's Ass ........................ Bass
Beggar-My-Neighbour ..................... Labour
Ben Cartwright .......................... Shi*e
Bended Knees ............................ Cheese
Bengal Lancer ........................... Chancer
Berkshire Hunt (Berk) ................... ****
Barry McGuigan .......................... Big 'Un (Big One)
Big Ben ................................. Ten
Big Dippers ............................. Slippers
Billy Goat .............................. Coat
Bird Lime ............................... Time
Biscuits And Cheese ..................... Knees
Bladder Of Lard ......................... Card
Bo-Peep ................................. Sleep
Boat Race ............................... Face
Bob Hope ................................ Soap
Bob Squash .............................. Wash
Bobby Moore ............................. Score (Twenty Pounds)
Bobby Moore ............................. Sure
Bonney Fair ............................. Hair
Bonnie And Clyde ........................ Snide
Boracic Lint ............................ Skint
Borrow And Beg .......................... Egg
Botany Bay .............................. Run Away
Bottle And Glass ........................ Arse
Bottle And Glass ........................ Class
Bottle And Stopper ...................... Copper (Police)
Bottle Of Cola .......................... Bowler
Bottle Of Glue .......................... Two
Bottle Of Porter ........................ Daughter
Bottle Of Sauce ......................... Horse
Bottle Of Scotch ........................ Wrist Watch
Bow And Arrow ........................... Barrow
Bow And Arrow ........................... Sparrow
Box Of Toys ............................. Noise
Brace And Bits .......................... Tits
Brad Pitt ............................... ****
Brahms And Lizst ........................ Pi**ed
Brass Band .............................. Hand
Brass Nail .............................. Tail (Prostitute)
Brass Tacks ............................. Facts
Bread And Butter ........................ Gutter
Bread And Cheese ........................ Sneeze
Bread And Honey ......................... Money
Bricks And Mortar ....................... Daughter
Bright And Breezy ....................... Easy
Brighton Pier ........................... Queer (Homosexual)
Brighton Rock ........................... C*ck (*****)
Briney Marlin ........................... Darling
Bristol City ............................ Titty
Britney Spears .......................... Beers
Brixton Riot ............................ Diet
Brothers And Sisters .................... Whiskers
Brown Bread ............................. Dead
Brown Hat ............................... Cat
Brussel Sprouts ......................... Scouts
Bubble And Squeak ....................... Beak
Bubble And Squeak ....................... Greek
Bubble And Squeak ....................... Week
Bucket And Pail ......................... Jail
Buddy Holly ............................. Volley
Bugs Bunny .............................. Money
Bull And Cow ............................ Row (Quarrel)
Bullock's Horn .......................... Pawn (In-Pawn)
Burnt Cinder ............................ Window
Burton On Trent ......................... Rent
Bushel And Peck ......................... Neck
Bushey Park ............................. Joke
Bushey Park ............................. Lark
Buster Keaton ........................... Meeting
Butcher's Hook .......................... Look
#16
Cab Rank ................................ Bank
Cain And Abel ........................... Table
Calvin Klein ............................ Fine
Can Of Oil .............................. Boil
Canal Boat .............................. Tote
Cape Of Good Hope ....................... Soap
Captain Cook ............................ Book
Captain Hook ............................ Book
Cash And Carry-ed ....................... Married
Cat And Cages ........................... Wages
Cat And Mouse ........................... House
Cattle Truck ............................ ****
Cellarflap .............................. Tap (Ask For A Loan)
Chalfont St. Giles ...................... Piles (Haemorrhoids)
Chalk Farm .............................. Arm
Charles Fox ............................. Box
Charlie Chan ............................ Tan
Charlie Nash ............................ Slash (****)
Charlie Prescot ......................... Waistcoat
Charlie Pride ........................... Ride
Charlie Ronce ........................... Ponce
Chas And Dave ........................... Shave
Cheerful Giver .......................... Liver
Cheese And Kisses ....................... Missus
Cheltenham Bold ......................... Cold
Cherry Hog .............................. Dog
Cherry Ripe ............................. Pipe
Chevy Chase ............................. Face
Chew The Fat ............................ Chat
Chicken And Rice ........................ Nice
China Plate ............................. Mate (Friend)
Chipmunks ............................... Trunks
Chocolate Fudge ......................... Judge
Chopsticks .............................. Six
Christian Slater ........................ Later
Christmas Eve ........................... Believe
Cilla Black ............................. Back
Claires Raynors ......................... Trainers
Clever Mike ............................. Bike
Clickety Click .......................... Sixty-Six
Clothes Peg ............................. Egg
Coalheaver (From Giver) ................. Penny
Coals And Coke .......................... Broke (Financially Ruined)
Coat And Badge .......................... Cadge (Borrow)
Cobblers Awls ........................... Balls (Testicles)
Cock And Hen ............................ Ten
Cock Linnet ............................. Minute
Cock Sparrow ............................ Barrow
Cockroach ............................... Coach
Conan Doyle ............................. Boil
Council Gritter ......................... Shi**er
Country Cousin .......................... Dozen
Cousin Sis .............................. **** (On The)
Cow's Calf .............................. Half (Fifty Pence)
Cream Cookies ........................... Bookies (Bookmakers)
Cream Cracker-ed ........................ Knackered
Crust Of Bread .......................... Head
Cuddle And Kiss ......................... Miss
Cuddle And Kiss ......................... ****
Currant Bun ............................. Nun
Currant Bun ............................. Son
Currant Bun ............................. Sun
Currant Cake-y .......................... Shaky
Custard And Jelly ....................... Telly (Television)
Cuts And Scratches ...................... Matches
#17
#18
Due to the to swear filter you have to fill the ****, Most are obvious though!!

(Or just click the link!)

Some are brilliant though!
#19
Hmmmm I still think there are a few in there I should still edit. (the swaer filter hasn't picked up on them!)
#20
peteivy
Hmmmm I still think there are a few in there I should still edit. (the swaer filter hasn't picked up on them!)


Yeah, Might be best to stick one "*" in.

The barclays bank in particular i'm surpised it didn't pick up!

I always thought it was "Barclays Bankers - Total wa*kers" :giggle:
#21
Right thats me done for the night. I'm off for a Brad Pitt and then I'm going to bed where hopefully she might give me some crust of bread while she sits on my Chevy Chase. :thumbsup:

Night
#22
peteivy
Right thats me done for the night. I'm off for a Brad Pitt and then I'm going to bed where hopefully she might give me some crust of bread while she sits on my Chevy Chase. :thumbsup:

Night


:lol:

Night Pete! :thumbsup:
#23
Used a word today and thought "I wonder if thats Cockney"

Is the word Nonce originally from Cockney land?
#24
peteivy
Right thats me done for the night. I'm off for a Brad Pitt and then I'm going to bed where hopefully she might give me some crust of bread while she sits on my Chevy Chase. :thumbsup:

Night


:w00t: I like it. A true Londener (pronounced Lahndener). Im from Sarf Lahnden, it's the accent that counts, but if you can bung as many cokney rhyming slang phrases in there you will be fine.
#25
I am from the East End and a Cockney, the slang is not used as a form of language maybe the odd bit here and there you wont have any probs sussing out whats what the slang came about when congermongers had the police on thier backs for selling thier wares in the streets so the slang developed like a code enjoy your trip.:roll:
#26
The most common one I think. (Heard today!) is "Dog and bone"

I presume its cockney!

Edit and Have a turkish (bath) = laugh.

And champagne Charlie for lemonade money (Love that saying, Whether its cockney or not!)
#27
dunno why your worried ,there's no londoners left down saff,,,,they all live in spain,,,,now if i was you i'd be catching up on pakistani,jamacian,chinese,ect ect,,,,then you will be fine
#28
They got something funny going on with money:| They talk about ponies ... which means a tenner or something. Think monkey may have been another amount. Dunno if it is lahndan or just not scottish.
[admin]#29
Gaia
They got something funny going on with money:| They talk about ponies ... which means a tenner or something. Think monkey may have been another amount. Dunno if it is lahndan or just not scottish.


Is monkey £25? :giggle:

Here's a translator!! It comes up with all sorts of Jackson Pollocks :giggle:
#30
Best piece of southern dialect i heard was when i went to the greyhound track.

"Four's a car-pit", in reference to dog number 4. Now, dog number 4 was running particularly bad in that race.

I later found out what was meant by that. It meant the other dogs were walking all over it, like a carpet :giggle:

Well, it made me smile along with, "You're 'avin' a woolie intcha", as in, wooly hat and scarf, which meant laff, sorry, larff......halcyon days :)

(all "typos" are on purpose to help aid pronunciation :thumbsup:)
#31
juliet_bravo
Is monkey £25? :giggle:

Soz JB but a Monkey's £500....

Lady Godiva = £5
Ayrton Senna (AKA Dead Brazillian) = £10
A score = £20
Pony = £25 (Gaia, remind me to owe you money)
Bullseye (or 1/2 a ton) = £50
A ton = £100
Monkey = £500
Archer = £2,000 (the amount he handed to a pro....)

And for anyone that thinks you need to know ANY of this sh#t coming to London, I'd like to sell you some of those paving slabs that are made of gold....Iom-RF...you still looking to sell that cow for some magic beans?!?!?
#32
CHARLIETHIRTYTWO
Iom-RF...you still looking to sell that cow for some magic beans?!?!?


Swap if for a monkey and its a done deal. :giggle:

(And shite, The other day I actually said "You're 'avin a bubble" :giggle: )
#33
Iom-RF
shite, The other day I actually said "You're 'avin a bubble" :giggle: )


[SIZE="4"]The truth is indeed out there.....
Iom-RF IS Peggy Mitchell!!!!!!!![/SIZE]

http://img296.imageshack.us/img296/6051/1404eastbr4.jpg
#34
Cheeky git!, What a load of Cobblers!!

When are you next off sunning yourself again..........................
#35
Iom-RF
Cheeky git!, What a load of Cobblers!!
When are you next off sunning yourself again..........................


Don't take to too much colour (other than green hair & purple suits) so wasn't planning on dodging off again just yet...if I did you'd only end up starting another thread wondering where I am?!?!?
(Amazing how worried people get when they don't know where I am or what I'm up to!?!?!)


Should've thrown back a piccy of Dot or the lovely Pat (with photoshopped green hair) if you wanted a cheap "bubble"....

PS - Be grateful I never said you were like Ethel, playing with your lil' Willie!!!!
#36
The sun must've got to your bonce!!!

I haven't seen Eastenders for years either!!!

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