Dates Part II: Do's and Dont's - HotUKDeals
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Dates Part II: Do's and Dont's

black gerbil1 Avatar
7y, 8m agoPosted 7 years, 8 months ago
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black gerbil1 Avatar
7y, 8m agoPosted 7 years, 8 months ago

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dont pay for the meal the first time, they will treat you as a doormat after that.
Don't say "your mum's well fit for her age" :thumbsup:
Don't say "your mum's well fit for her age" :thumbsup:

lol been there done that.
Don't be afraid to hate.
Never ever in a restaurant on a first date:

[LEFT][COLOR=#000000]Wipe your nose on your date's sleeve. Twice.[/COLOR][/LEFT]

[LEFT][COLOR=#000000]Repeat every third third word you say say. [/COLOR][/LEFT]

[LEFT][COLOR=#000000]Stare at your date's neck, and grind your teeth audibly. [/COLOR][/LEFT]

[LEFT][COLOR=#000000]Stand up every five minutes, circle your table with your arms outstretched, and make airplane sounds. [/COLOR][/LEFT]

[LEFT][COLOR=#000000]Ask for crayons to colour the placemat. This works very well in fancier venues that use linen tablecloths. [/COLOR][/LEFT]

[LEFT][COLOR=#000000]Howl and whistle at womens' legs, especially if you are female. [/COLOR][/LEFT]

[LEFT][COLOR=#000000]When ordering, inquire whether the restaurant has any live food. [/COLOR]

[COLOR=#000000]Without asking, eat off your date's plate. Eat more from their plate than they do. [/COLOR][/LEFT]

[LEFT][COLOR=#000000]Eat everything on your plate within 30 seconds of it being placed in front of you. [/COLOR][/LEFT]

[LEFT][COLOR=#000000]Ask him/her "What took you so long in the restroom?!?" [/COLOR][/LEFT]

[LEFT][COLOR=#000000]Ask your date how much money they have with them. [/COLOR][/LEFT]

[LEFT][COLOR=#000000]Lick your plate. Offer to lick theirs. [/COLOR][/LEFT]

[LEFT][COLOR=#000000]Fill your pockets with sugar packets, as well as salt and pepper pots, silverware, floral arrangements... i.e anything on the table that isn't bolted down. [/COLOR][/LEFT]

[LEFT][COLOR=#000000]Slide under the table. Take your plate with you. [/COLOR][/LEFT]

[LEFT][COLOR=#000000]Take a break, and go into the toilet. When you return to the table, throw a spare pair of underwear on the back of one of the chairs. Insist that they just need airing out. [/COLOR][/LEFT]

[LEFT][COLOR=#000000]Order your food by colours and textures. Sculpt. [/COLOR][/LEFT]
Say "my ex bf wouldnt of done that"....

Or ..." ive always wanted a big wedding, do you have a big family?"
Don't be afraid to tackle bigotry and ignorance, and don't forget to wash your hands after going to the toilet.
Say to her that her Mum doesn't like peas either
Don't forget that wolves are usually sheep.

Don't forget to listen to Lily Allen's song [----] you (# 8) about George Bush here
Liddle ol' me
Don't be afraid to tackle bigotry and ignorance

That was the first two subjects I was going to talk about.
If you intend on chancing your arm at some hot lovin' (as your 'afters') don't eat anything too hot, spicy or strong - doublely so if you're a girl!
Yeh and make sure you wear clean jockeys!

Nothing worse than the bedroom smelling of cheesy socks either, change them girls.

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