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Duck walks into a bar....

jtx Avatar
7y, 2m agoPosted 7 years, 2 months ago
A duck walks into a pub and orders a pint of beer and a ham sandwich. The barman looks at him and says, 'Hang on! You're a duck.' 'I see your eyes are working,' replies the duck.

'And you can talk!' exclaims the barman. 'I see your ears are working, too,' says the duck.
'Now if you don't mind, can I have my beer and my sandwich please?'

'Certainly, sorry about that,' says the barman as he pulls the duck's pint. 'It's just we don't get many ducks in this pub. What are you doing round this way?' 'I'm working on the building site across the road,'
explains the duck. 'I'm a plasterer.'

The flabbergasted barman cannot believe the duck and wants to learn more, but takes the hint when
the duck pulls out a newspaper from his bag and proceeds to read it. So, the duck reads his paper, drinks his beer, eats his sandwich, bids the barman good day and leaves.

The same thing happens for two weeks.

Then one day the circus comes to town.

The ringmaster comes into the pub for a pint and the barman says to him 'You're with the circus, aren't you? Well, I know this duck that could be just brilliant in your circus. He talks, drinks beer, eats
sandwiches, reads the newspaper and everything!'

'Sounds marvelous,' says the ringmaster, handing over his business card. 'Get him to
give me a call.'

So the next day when the duck comes into the pub the barman says, 'Hey Mr. Duck, I reckon I can line you up with a top job, paying really good money.' 'I'm always looking for the next job,' says the duck. 'Where is it?' 'At the circus,' says the barman.

'The circus?' repeats the duck. 'That's right,' replies the barman. 'The circus?' the duck asks again. 'That place with the big tent?' 'Yeah,' the barman replies. 'With all the animals who live in cages, and prformers who live in caravans?' says the duck. 'Of course,' the barman replies.

'And the tent has canvas sides and a big canvas roof with a hole in the middle?' persists the duck. 'That's right!' says the barman.

The duck shakes his head in amazement, and says ..
.
.

.


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'What would they want with a plasterer??!'
jtx Avatar
7y, 2m agoPosted 7 years, 2 months ago
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#1
i thought it was gonna be.................

duck walks into a bar......

quack!
#2
Good joke jtx!
Heres another :

A guy walks into a bar holding three ducks. He sets them on the bar and orders a drink. After talking with the bartender for a while, the man excuses himself to use the restroom. The bartender feel a tad awkward with just himself and three ducks at the bar, so he decides to make small talk with them. He asks the first duck, "What's your name?""Huey," replies the duck. "So, how's your day been?""Oh, I've had a great day," replies Huey. "I've been in and out of puddles all day." The bartender asks the second duck, "What's your name?" "Duey," replies the duck."So, how's your day been?" "Oh, I've had a great day," replies Duey. "I've been in and out of puddles all day." The witty bartender says to the third duck, "So I guess your name is Louie?"

The duck replies,





"No, I'm Puddles." :w00t:
#3
5nowman
Good joke jtx!
Heres another :

A guy walks into a bar holding three ducks. He sets them on the bar and orders a drink. After talking with the bartender for a while, the man excuses himself to use the restroom. The bartender feel a tad awkward with just himself and three ducks at the bar, so he decides to make small talk with them. He asks the first duck, "What's your name?""Huey," replies the duck. "So, how's your day been?""Oh, I've had a great day," replies Huey. "I've been in and out of puddles all day." The bartender asks the second duck, "What's your name?" "Duey," replies the duck."So, how's your day been?" "Oh, I've had a great day," replies Duey. "I've been in and out of puddles all day." The witty bartender says to the third duck, "So I guess your name is Louie?"

The duck replies,





"No, I'm Puddles." :w00t:


OUCH... lol

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