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ex boyfriend refusing to give my stuff back!!!

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ok so me and my ex split up 3 weeks ago, it wasn't a nasty split and we were only together a couple of months but now he's refusing to give me back all the stuff that he borrowed from me he lives abo… Read More
missp27 Avatar
7y, 7m agoPosted 7 years, 7 months ago
ok so me and my ex split up 3 weeks ago, it wasn't a nasty split and we were only together a couple of months but now he's refusing to give me back all the stuff that he borrowed from me
he lives about 20 minutes outside my town and keeps giving me he excuse "i've been to busy" yet i've bumped into him mooching around town a couple of times since the split when he could of quite easily bought my things round then (i only live a few minutes drive outside of town) each time he look very embarrassed and mumbled about "being busy" grrrrrr
he's got about £50 worth of my dvd's and c'ds and being a single mum that's quite alot of moneys worth for me.
the question i wanted to ask was is it technically theft to deliberately hold onto someone elses property and not have any intention of returning them, tis doing my head in at the mo!
missp27 Avatar
7y, 7m agoPosted 7 years, 7 months ago
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#1
cant you go knock on his door and ask for em?
#2
Break into his house and leave a boiling bunny on the stove, he should get the message.

(if that's the both of you in your avi then you need to change it!)
#3
clearly he isnt taking the split very well.
#4
i would do but he lives in the sticks and i can't drive :/
he asked to borrow this stuff and being a kind hearted soul i always said yes, gonna be a long time before i lend anyone else anything again!
#5
Carley
Break into his house and leave a boiling bunny on the stove, he should get the message.

(if that's the both of you in your avi then you need to change it!)


lol no! that's my best mate with me in my piccy!
#6
missp27
lol no! that's my best mate with me in my piccy!


does he drive? get him to go with you to get your stuff?
#7
Carley
does he drive? get him to go with you to get your stuff?

that's a good idea, he's on his hols for another week so if i have no joy by then i might have to do that
#8
Carley
does he drive? get him to go with you to get your stuff?


yeh i'd find someone who drives and collect it....or call him and tell him if he doesnt return it your dad/big bro/etc will collect for you?
banned#9
its not theft and techinically unless you can prove they are yours, he can keep them I believe.
#10
csiman
its not theft and techinically unless you can prove they are yours, he can keep them I believe.

:x

but they're not his! :x
banned#11
missp27;6964575
:x

but they're not his! :x

so? its your word against his I'm afraid.
#12
You should have got the gear back before you broke his heart
#13
pinkleponkle
You should have got the gear back before you broke his heart

i didn't break his heart, we weren't together long enough for that!
#14
we had something like this happen to a friend back in the summer.

maybe not the right way to do it, but a crowd of us went with her to his house - and sat outside in our cars till he opened the door, then we all piled up to his door. He let her in to get her stuff

get your friends to go with you.
#15
missp27
i didn't break his heart, we weren't together long enough for that!


Seems he was more into it than what you were. :oops: :p
#16
missp27
i didn't break his heart, we weren't together long enough for that!

If that was true he wouldnt be lieing about "being busy" and would quite happily give you your stuff back. He is clearly taking this alot worse than you think, 3 weeks or not.
#17
scott1295
Seems he was more into it than what you were. :oops: :p

it's ridiculous we didn't even have an argument when i ended it but he's even blocked me from his facebook, lol, which is a bit over dramatic, he was just so irratating i just couldn't stand it anymore :oops:
#18
missp27
it's ridiculous we didn't even have an argument when i ended it but he's even blocked me from his facebook, lol, which is a bit over dramatic, he was just so irratating i just couldn't stand it anymore :oops:


Don't underestimate how upsetting being dumped can be. It's obvious to us that he's taking it hard,
Just leave him alone with his dvd's and cd's, I mean how important can they be?
#19
deek72
Don't underestimate how upsetting being dumped can be. It's obvious to us that he's taking it hard,
Just leave him alone with his dvd's and cd's, I mean how important can they be?

i wouldn't mind so much but i'ts10 dvd's and my 2 favourite albums, i can't afford to replace them all
#20
errrr go to house and get them?
banned#21
missp27;6964846
i wouldn't mind so much but i'ts10 dvd's and my 2 favourite albums, i can't afford to replace them all

is that a picture of the two of you in your avatar?
#22
csiman
is that a picture of the two of you in your avatar?

no that's me and my best mate in the picture
#23
black gerbil1
errrr go to house and get them?

have you read the entire thread? he lives in the sticks about 20 mins drive away and i can't drive
#24
missp27
have you read the entire thread? he lives in the sticks about 20 mins drive away and i can't drive


Just ignore the imbecile.

Check your pms.
#25
He's got Cd's etc, how does you not having £50 worth of them have any baring on your life?

Call the Police and ask them if you don't like the advice given.
I think you know what they'll say.
#26
As far as I'm aware the other responses in the thread are unfortunately correct, it's not theft and the police will be unlikely to get involved as they'll label it a civil matter. Unfortunately I can't remember the conclusion to the thread where another person was having almost the same reason, do you have any friends with cars that could give you a run over to the house (and give you a bit of backup) at time you know your ex is likely to be in?

John
banned#27
thesaint;6964944
He's got Cd's etc, how does you not having £50 worth of them have any baring on your life?

Call the Police and ask them if you don't like the advice given.
I think you know what they'll say.

Wow - As helpful as ever :giggle:
#28
missp27
have you read the entire thread? he lives in the sticks about 20 mins drive away and i can't drive

oh well I guess its impossible to get someone to drive you there or catch a bus. Because when I never had a car i never went as far as 20mins from were i lived.
#29
black gerbil1
oh well I guess its impossible to get someone to drive you there or catch a bus. Because when I never had a car i never went as far as 20mins from were i lived.


What sort of car do you have ?:whistling:
#30
black gerbil1
oh well I guess its impossible to get someone to drive you there or catch a bus. Because when I never had a car i never went as far as 20mins from were i lived.

well considering he lives in the middle of no where as i've said already there arent many buses there (1 every couple of hours) it's not a very practical idea
#31
black gerbil1
oh well I guess its impossible to get someone to drive you there or catch a bus. Because when I never had a car i never went as far as 20mins from were i lived.


the one thing youve said that i agree with
#32
missp27
well considering he lives in the middle of no where as i've said already there arent many buses there (1 every couple of hours) it's not a very practical idea


If you time it right, you won't have to wait for two hours, just get there 10 minutes before the bus is due.
#33
either cut your losses ( least you're out of the relationship and still alive ! )

or call the police and lay it on thick... you wont be safe unless they come along with you, see if you can get an accompaniment.

Honestly, sounds like the ex-bf doesnt want to pop round and see you.. certainly not to bring your stuff back.

It isn't his priority to make you happy, tells me you're best off out of this, so congratulations xx

He may suddenly feel some priority if you turn up with a couple of burly best friends saying ... return her stuff.... please :)
#34
ClarityofMind
either cut your losses ( least you're out of the relationship and still alive ! )

or call the police and lay it on thick... you wont be safe unless they come along with you, see if you can get an accompaniment.


She didn't mention him being violent.
What a waste of Police time. "Laying it on thick" or lying as it is known, is not the way to deal with situations like this!
#35
I find it hard to believe that only your best friend can drive you there. It's not really up to the ex to hand deliver the stuff back considering you dumped him. Yes he's being petty, but there you go dumpees can be petty sometimes. If you want the stuff back bad enough you will find a way to get to his house.
#36
ClarityofMind
or call the police and lay it on thick... you wont be safe unless they come along with you, see if you can get an accompaniment.


:? :?

For a few cds?
#37
Just be glad your ending it , if he's this childish he was never worth your time.
#38
thesaint
She didn't mention him being violent.
What a waste of Police time. "Laying it on thick" or lying as it is known, is not the way to deal with situations like this!


I didn't mean that necessarily she wouldn't be safe.. think the text is misconstruing my words there. If she wants a police officer to accompany her in my experience they WILL do that, but only if you're able to persuade them it'd be a good idea.
#39
Great use of police time, it's hard enough to get them out when you genuinely need them. I can't see the police officer being all that happy when you come away with 2 cds and a few dvds.
#40
jasonrat
:? :?

For a few cds?


Personally, I wouldn't bother but if its distressing her and "doing her head in" and it's a huge loss to her personally then this is why she wants them back.

Different people have different tolerance levels of what they can accept as a worthwhile loss and walk away happily.

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