Have you had your arm broken by a swan? - HotUKDeals
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Have you had your arm broken by a swan?

duckmagicuk2 Avatar
9y, 4m agoPosted 9 years, 4 months ago
We all know the warnings, "swans can break your arm", but I've never actually found anyone who has had their arm broken by a swan. And believe me, I've tried.

I'm just disappointed that during my childhood I missed out on years of playing with swans because of false threats lol.

:giggle:
duckmagicuk2 Avatar
9y, 4m agoPosted 9 years, 4 months ago
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[mod]#1
Ha ha...........i haven't but i know a man that has (well sort of.....it actually broke his wrist. lol) :thumbsup:
#2
Nope, never seen anyone slip on a banana skin either...
#3
Nor, have a bucket of water fall on them whilst opening a door :giggle:
#4
I got attacked by a goose when I was young ..that was scary enough for me..nothing broken but they are fiesty.
#5
:) thats in the list of peter kay one liners (number twenty-eight)


Peter Kay's Universal Truths:

1) Triangular sandwiches taste better than square ones.

2) At the end of every party there is always a girl crying.

3) One of the most awkward things that can happen in a pub is when your pint-to-toilet cycle gets synchronised with a complete stranger.

4) You've never quite sure whether it's ok to eat green crisps.

5) Everyone who grew up in the 80's has entered the digits 55378008 into a calculator.

6) Reading when you're drunk is horrible.

7) Sharpening a pencil with a knife makes you feel really manly.

8)You're never quite sure whether it's against the law or not to have a fire in your back garden.

9) Nobody ever dares make cup-a-soup in a bowl.

10) You never know where to look when eating a banana.

11) Its impossible to describe the smell of a wet cat.

12) Prodding a fire with a stick makes you feel manly.

13) Rummaging in an overgrow garden will always turn up a bouncy ball.

14) You always feel a bit scared when stroking horses.

15) Everyone always remembers the day a dog ran into your school.

16) The most embarrassing thing you can do as schoolchild is to call your teacher mum or dad.

17) The smaller the monkey the more it looks like it would kill you at the first given opportunity.

1Cool Some days you see lots of people on crutches.

19) Every bloke has at some stage while taking a pee, flushed half way through and then raced against the flush.

20) Old women with mobile phones look wrong.

21) Its impossible to look cool whilst picking up a Frisbee.

22) Driving through a tunnel makes you feel excited.

23) You never ever run out of salt.

24) Old ladies can eat more than you think.

25) You can't respect a man who carries a dog.

26) There's no panic like the panic you momentarily feel when you've got your hand or head stuck in something.

27) No one knows the origins of their metal coat hangers.

2Cool Despite constant warning, you have never met anybody who has had their arm broken by a swan.

29) The most painful household incident is wearing socks and stepping on an upturned plug.

30) People who don't drive slam car doors too hard.

31) You've turned into your dad the day you put aside a thin piece of wood specifically to stir paint with.

32) Everyone had an uncle who tried to steal their nose.

33) Bricks are horrible to carry.

34) In every plate of chips there is a bad chip.

35) Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.


There are some good points there - I like 35
[mod]#6
OH NO!!!!!! :shock: I am number 31. :oops:
#7
My vote goes to No. 32 :giggle: :giggle:
#8
Syzable
OH NO!!!!!! :shock: I am number 31. :oops:



Is that along with all the other bits of wood that "might come in usefull one day"? :whistling:
[mod]#9
suze
Is that along with all the other bits of wood that "might come in usefull one day"? :whistling:


:oops: Got a shed full. :giggle:
#10
Number 9 is true! Its just not possible to make cup-a-soup in a bowl!
#11
and why is it that dogs get worms but worms dont get dogs????? is it because you would end up with huge strechy dog shaped worms...:whistling: i will get my coat :roll:
#12
Syzable
:oops: Got a shed full. :giggle:


Lol I used to have a bedroom full of stuff that could be useful - parents used to give me all sorts of cr*p like empty easter egg boxes and stuff because "I could make something with them" and then they moaned when my bedroom was a mess!

Finally got rid of it all, but they still try to offload it all on me - they dont want it, but they dont want to get rid of it - so it comes to me!
#13
Syzable
:oops: Got a shed full. :giggle:


How did I guess!!! :giggle: :giggle:
#14
Syzable
Ha ha...........i haven't but i know a man that has (well sort of.....it actually broke his wrist. lol) :thumbsup:


Thank you. :)
#15
1) Triangular sandwiches taste better than square ones.



I'm sorry but that is soooooooooo true!!!
#16
26) There's no panic like the panic you momentarily feel when you've got your hand or head stuck in something


This is one I have experienced, lol

Never heard the swan one though
#17
fireheaven
26) There's no panic like the panic you momentarily feel when you've got your hand or head stuck in something


This is one I have experienced, lol

Never heard the swan one though


Haha, yeah. Happened to me when i had my head in the car window and somebody decided to start winding it up haha.
#18
duckmagicuk2
Haha, yeah. Happened to me when i had my head in the car window and somebody decided to start winding it up haha.


Now that really made me laugh out loud, sorry :giggle:

My biggest moment of panic recently was when I was alone in the house fixing a kids toy and I realised I had superglued my hand to kitchen worktop :oops:
#19
29) The most painful household incident is wearing socks and stepping on an upturned plug.


True!!

I haven't seen anyone get their arm broken by a swan though.........Haven't seen anyone break a leg for good luck either.........
[mod]#20
Noooooo...the most painful household incident is opening a bottle of wine with a corkscrew and having the bottle neck snap and go straight through your hand..............but that's another story completely. :o
#21
29) The most painful household incident is wearing socks and stepping on an upturned plug.


Lego bricks are worse...
#22
Syzable
Noooooo...the most painful household incident is opening a bottle of wine with a corkscrew and having the bottle neck snap and go straight through your hand..............but that's another story completely. :o


Heard that one already mate. :D lol. Good story for the grandkids hehe.
#23
Someone been reading Adrian Mole? The last books has just about every character advise Adrian that a swan can break someone's arm.

John
#24
duckmagicuk2
Lego bricks are worse...


Mum chipped her kneecap kneeling on the lid from the lego box (shaped like a large lego brick) She was taking a photo at the time and all dad said was "Have you taken the photo yet?" :giggle: Ever so sensitive!
#25
kelly_o_fanatic
Mum chipped her kneecap kneeling on the lid from the lego box (shaped like a large lego brick) She was taking a photo at the time and all dad said was "Have you taken the photo yet?" :giggle: Ever so sensitive!


:giggle: :w00t:

Typical men though. No sympathy from us. :roll:
#26
duckmagicuk2
:giggle: :w00t:

Typical men though. No sympathy from us. :roll:


:giggle: Thats nothing, when I was born the nurse said "Do you want a cup of tea" meaning my mum, but my dad said yes and mum didnt get one for 90minutes! Got a photo of mum holding me and dad with cup of tea! :giggle:
[mod]#27
kelly_o_fanatic
:giggle: Thats nothing, when I was born the nurse said "Do you want a cup of tea" meaning my mum, but my dad said yes and mum didnt get one for 90minutes! Got a photo of mum holding me and dad with cup of tea! :giggle:


How lucky was he.........i was kicked out 15 minutes after the birth as it was the middle of the night and men on the wards weren't allowed in case they scared the ladies. :roll:
#28
Syzable
How lucky was he.........i was kicked out 15 minutes after the birth as it was the middle of the night and men on the wards weren't allowed in case they scared the ladies. :roll:


Well this was just after 9am, so didnt have that problem :) he did walk a 90minute journey to get to the hospital to see me though :thumbsup: so cant really complain
#29
duckmagicuk2
Lego bricks are worse...

Stickle bricks are worse
#30
jennybubbles
Stickle bricks are worse


Nope, I stand by lego. :p
#31
duckmagicuk2
Nope, I stand by lego. :p

:thinking: better than standing on it I guess
#32
Syzable
How lucky was he.........i was kicked out 15 minutes after the birth as it was the middle of the night and men on the wards weren't allowed in case they scared the ladies. :roll:



What like ladies in the maternity wards have never seen men before??!! :whistling:
#33
kelly_o_fanatic
:giggle: Thats nothing, when I was born the nurse said "Do you want a cup of tea" meaning my mum, but my dad said yes and mum didnt get one for 90minutes! Got a photo of mum holding me and dad with cup of tea! :giggle:



:giggle: So typical!! :whistling:
#34
suze
What like ladies in the maternity wards have never seen men before??!! :whistling:
:giggle: true!
#35
Syzable
How lucky was he.........i was kicked out 15 minutes after the birth as it was the middle of the night and men on the wards weren't allowed in case they scared the ladies. :roll:


Nooooooooo

Dont you know they are kicked out for their own safety and protection?:giggle:

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