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help im getting stressed.

mummyspam1985 Avatar
8y, 3m agoPosted 8 years, 3 months ago
im 29weeks pregnant, just been told got low blood pressure and thats why i keep getting dizzy. just put my 23month old to bed and have washed and tidied kitchen, bathroom, utility room and put all her tpys away while fiancee plays a stoopid game on his comp.

i dont expect help with house work but wood it be too much to ask for him to offer me a tea. i even asked him for one and he just moanded that its my own fault cos weekends are for doing stuff around the house. i was doing general housework, not decluttering or anything like that.

am i asking too much or is he an ass?
mummyspam1985 Avatar
8y, 3m agoPosted 8 years, 3 months ago
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#1
sorry to say i think he is an ass

No skin off his nose to make you a cuppa tea or at least offer to help you get those things done
#2
why don't you expect help?
jeez if i didn't help around the house the wife would crucify me.
he's an ass
#3
cos im a stay at home mum and dont think he should have too
#4
Poor you. Hasn't he heard of the 'modern man?'

Get yourself sat down before you drop down, (& put your feet up on his computer/console)
#5
mummyspam1985
cos im a stay at home mum and dont think he should have too
its half his fault you have low blood pressure too,he put you in that situation and you obviously need more help whilst pregnant,I personally wouldnt stand for it,my hubby is a diamond and doesnt ask just mucks in

Really hope it changes for you and you get the help and support you so need right now :)
#6
he is an ass

my OH does loads for me and if he can do it i cant see why your OH cant (my fiance is blind in one eye, epileptic and suffers short term memory loss and suffers from excruciating headaches!)

everything i ask my OH to do for me he does he helps with the housework and if im cleaning or whatever always asks if i want help

if your OH is like this now imagine what he will be like when the baby is here you need to kick him into touch - sharpish!!!
#7
If moaning doesn't work, how about pretending to faint? Wait 'til he's gone out for awhile and (previously discussing this with your doctor and tell him the situation, I know my uncle would do this for his patients lol) then get your doctor to call him on his mobile and say

"Hello sir, I'm your wife's doctor, no reason for alarm but I should just inform you that your wife has had a rather serious dizzy spell and in medical opinion she should really be resting, she'll do harm to herself if she's keep straining herself like she is at the moment"

Let us know if it works! :)

...oh and yeah he's being an ****
#8
This is just men generally. The only thing me and the OH argue about is housework and who gets the lie ins. I have a 3 year old and a 12 month old. I remember at 37 weeks pregnant decorating the babies room when he wernt out and also trimming the 8ft hedge. They just don't realise how much we do... They think that a quick polish and hoover is all that is needed to clean around. Before any one starts saying that not all men are like that, I know they aren't all the same. But I agree he could at least make you a cuppa
#9
Think you already know the answer :whistling:
#10
Please sit down and rest. I had low blood pressure when I was pregnant and it made me feel ill - I was dizzy, felt sick and 'far away'. Your OH should be doing far more - you're pregnant and he should look after you - no excuses.
banned#11
Yeah he's an ass :giggle:
#12
What a swine!
Pull out the fuse in the fuse board for the room that the computer is in! AND HIDE IT!
and as for the rest of the stuff - leave it and when he finally notices I suggest you tell him to get off his fat **** and do it himself!

oh and by the way - YOU AND BABY ARE FAR MORE IMPORTANT THAN THE HOUSEWORK SO TAKE A REST AND LOOK AFTER YOU BOTH AND YOUR OTHER ONE!

Take care
#13
ass lol he should help you, and def make u a tea..ure pregnant need to take it easy.
#14
What An **** Im In A Wheelchair And I Do The Clothes Washing The Dishwashing And Mop The Laminate Floors Every 3 Days I Make All The Brews And Sometimes Tea And Im A Fat Crip
#15
mummyspam1985
cos im a stay at home mum and dont think he should have too



I have one of those so know where you are coming from. I work part time so apparently don't need any help with two rowdy boys under 8, I don't deserve a holiday and I shouldn't go out cos its not fair for him to have to look after the kids for one evening.

Talk to him though, he may not realise what he is doing.

My talking to mine is done!
#16
He's an ass , i have 7 month old which im ashamed to say i've never bathed due to complications and being re-admitted 2 weeks after c-section with a very serious haematoma. I was too scare to bath newborn when i was eventually well., (about 10 weeks after birth) it has so just become habit that hubby bathe him. My hubby gets in from 10/11 hour day he takes over childcare so i can cook and clean . He will bath and feed our son his weetabix ( HV told us to start him on these 6 weeks ago as he was waking at night where he hadnt b4) .
Apart from a cuddle hubby totally does it all for our son from 5.30/6pm onwards until he goes to bed 7.30/8pm.
Hubby enjoys the time woth our son and allows me to cook , make bottles, laundry w/e didnt get done in the day.

I couldnt cope if hubby wasnt so supportive , so really feel for mum''s that arent supportive. .
Venting to strangers is good and dont let ne1 tell you otherwise
banned#17
raptorcigs
What An **** Im In A Wheelchair And I Do The Clothes Washing The Dishwashing And Mop The Laminate Floors Every 3 Days I Make All The Brews And Sometimes Tea And Im A Fat Crip


Your such a wonderful husband and father to your children.

A real example to other's :thumbsup:
#18
Ass!!
#19
he's an ass! do his share and once stuff is done and kids in bed and then time for playing games or sitting and chilling with you especially as you're pregnant and so far on.

hide his games or controllers!! ha ha
#20
i do believe that a women should do all the housework etc. but id like him to do the stuff that i cant. like sorting through his clothes etc so that i can tidy the bedroom. i did loose it with him last night he just keeps saying thats what weekends are for.

11 weeks till baby arrives so that 22 days if he actiually does bother doing stuff, to get the house tidy and clean, we still got to refit our kitchen yet. i want to keep on top of the housewor cos otherwise it just gets too much. but he knew i wasnt feeling well and didnt even bother pretending to be doing something. his best reason for not offering me a drink "i havent made one for myself"

he never lifts a finger in the house, though he does change the babies bum if i ask him to. would be nice if he put coffe back in the cuboard or put his dish in sick or rubbish in bin, or clothes in wash basket. simple stuff like that
#21
mummyspam1985;2709331
i do believe that a women should do all the housework etc. but id like him to do the stuff that i cant. like sorting through his clothes etc so that i can tidy the bedroom. i did loose it with him last night he just keeps saying thats what weekends are for.

11 weeks till baby arrives so that 22 days if he actiually does bother doing stuff, to get the house tidy and clean, we still got to refit our kitchen yet. i want to keep on top of the housewor cos otherwise it just gets too much. but he knew i wasnt feeling well and didnt even bother pretending to be doing something. his best reason for not offering me a drink "i havent made one for myself"

he never lifts a finger in the house, though he does change the babies bum if i ask him to. would be nice if he put coffe back in the cuboard or put his dish in sick or rubbish in bin, or clothes in wash basket. simple stuff like that


You should be resting this time of night :whistling:
#22
i agree he is a lazy ass. he should help you with all housework. id kill to go out and work atleasst there you get breaks and an uninteruppted dinner. i dont as a atay home mum
#23
raptorcigs
What An **** Im In A Wheelchair And I Do The Clothes Washing The Dishwashing And Mop The Laminate Floors Every 3 Days I Make All The Brews And Sometimes Tea And Im A Fat Crip


a slimming crip do you not mean.

your a star, your missus should hire you out.













ps hows perdy
#24
Like everyone else ^^^ says, including the fat crip (lol @ rapy) says - he's an ass, you have to take it easy now, stop, put your feet up, tell him to pull his weight, stop being a doormat.
You actually already know this, I would think.:friends:
#25
I despair of men like the OP describes.

You know the answer already as Chesso says, make him responsible.

PS Is he a mummy's boy ? Did his mother run around after him ?? Just interested.
#26
He only gets away with what you let him :thumbsup:
#27
your not asking for much hes just an ass :)
1 Like #28
mummyspam1985
i do believe that a women should do all the housework etc. but id like him to do the stuff that i cant. like sorting through his clothes etc so that i can tidy the bedroom. i did loose it with him last night he just keeps saying thats what weekends are for.

11 weeks till baby arrives so that 22 days if he actiually does bother doing stuff, to get the house tidy and clean, we still got to refit our kitchen yet. i want to keep on top of the housewor cos otherwise it just gets too much. but he knew i wasnt feeling well and didnt even bother pretending to be doing something. his best reason for not offering me a drink "i havent made one for myself"

he never lifts a finger in the house, though he does change the babies bum if i ask him to. would be nice if he put coffe back in the cuboard or put his dish in sick or rubbish in bin, or clothes in wash basket. simple stuff like that


He is an ass but to be fair your not helping yourself.

You and your children are far far more important than the housework. You need to realise you have to slow down for the sake of your health. Your not much use to your children if your sick.

Yor husband needs a kick up the bum nad a stronger grip on reality. You CAN'T DO EVERYTHING. Slow down and concentrate on growing his little one :)

The way we saw it was Mr B went out to work, that was his job, the hours he was away it was my job to look after ankle muncher. When he finnished work so did I and we split the 'work' 50/50 for the rest of the day. Once he was home cooking, cleaning, bathing, playing all of that was a joint endeveor We created the child together, we provide and care for him together.
#29
jennybubbles
He is an ass but to be fair your not helping yourself.

You and your children are far far more important than the housework. You need to realise you have to slow down for the sake of your health. Your not much use to your children if your sick.

Yor husband needs a kick up the bum nad a stronger grip on reality. You CAN'T DO EVERYTHING. Slow down and concentrate on growing his little one :)

The way we saw it was Mr B went out to work, that was his job, the hours he was away it was my job to look after ankle muncher. When he finnished work so did I and we split the 'work' 50/50 for the rest of the day. Once he was home cooking, cleaning, bathing, playing all of that was a joint endeveor We created the child together, we provide and care for him together.


:thumbsup: Well written Jen and worth the OP reading a few times over. OP might even print it out and staple it to the front page of his morning newspaper ? !
banned#30
"I do believe, that a woman, should do all the housework etc"

Why, do you believe, the above which century were you born in?

Was your mum a slave to your father, you need more feminists in your life and maybe you should consider, going with a woman :thumbsup:
#31
DLM
"I do believe, that a woman, should do all the housework etc"

Why, do you believe, the above which century were you born in?

Was your mum a slave to your father, you need more feminists in your life and maybe you should consider, going with a woman :thumbsup:


i see it that i dont work, i look after the house, kids and him and thats what i get paid to do. even though i have bout 20pound a month that i could actually spend on me whereas he had a cheek to moan that his current account went all the way down to 600pounds that month, he only gives me 300.

im so fed up. its saturday the day we apparently do things round the house, so i got up measured all the windows, he palyed on comp, we all went to shop to look at curtains, but he's too toght to buy them, and refuses to get roller blinds for bedroom. now he's in awful mood. threw a tape measure, slammed some doors and gone out front door without even saying a word to me, and more importantly without saying bye to our daughter who was standing next to him. i hate it when he's like this. and he's like it cos i told him to sort the bedroom the other night and cos i asked for a cup of tea last night. i just want to scream!!!!

are all men like this or just mine?

i feel like im living with my step dad and i hated that:x
#32
..mine isnt hun. seems abit unfair, just cos ure a 'housewife' doesnt mean they cant help, espesh being pregnant.
he needs to respect you. im sure he still loves you, but he is being a nasty pasty atm lol

i mean he can play games, but mb after he's made u a cuppa..or seen to kids or sooomething u know.
#33
he sounds like a right muppet (no offence lol) but when the missus was pregnant i wouldnt let her do half what you did not only for her health but the fact that i help make the mess so why shouldnt i help clear it. i no you may feel a bit guilty as your a stay @ home mum but dont be as bringing up kids is a full time job as it is (my mum said that to me as a kid as it wasnt till i had a kid i new what she was saying) just take a rest do what u can when you can, better still leave the housework for a few days and let him see if he hates the mess enough to pick it up, me and my old man must be weirdo's as i like house work lol works up a good old sweat + i always find money around the house i never new i had lol
#34
he is an ass, mine helps me with all housework doesn't mind 1 bit, he shouldn't expect you to do anything.

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