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If you have children....

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Do you monitor their access to the internet? Do they only use the internet WITH you? What precautions, if any, do you have in place to ensure the sites they are using are " age and stage appropr… Read More
ClarityofMind Avatar
7y, 9m agoPosted 7 years, 9 months ago
Do you monitor their access to the internet?

Do they only use the internet WITH you?

What precautions, if any, do you have in place to ensure the sites they are using are " age and stage appropriate"?

Have you taught them to develop an internet persona that is separate to their "real world" personality?

What software do you use to protect them if any?
ClarityofMind Avatar
7y, 9m agoPosted 7 years, 9 months ago
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#1
blooming eck, I sound like i'm passing round a work memo here.. but yes, any input appreciated.

Bearing in mind...

http://www.hotukdeals.com/item/494511/age-verificaton-for-sales/?p=6474776#post6474776
banned#2
don't know but I'll be logging every key they press on the keyboard and every website they visit, and have screen shots of what they are looking at emailed to my mail box...piece of software I bought for £10 :thumbsup:

By 13 they'll probably be as keyed up on computers as I am at 26 and disable it lol
#3
what age do you think they can use the net unmoniterd?
#4
lumoruk
don't know but I'll be logging every key they press on the keyboard and every website they visit, and have screen shots of what they are looking at emailed to my mail box...piece of software I bought for £10 :thumbsup: By 13 they'll probably be as keyed up on computers as I am at 26


Thing is...

and I'm such an over-protective Mum...

Kids get to a certain age and you do have to entrust them with your belief.

I wouldnt be spying on their internet use in just the same way that I wouldn't spy on a partners or friends.
#5
COM i got dizzy there! i have had a few glasses of wine but didnt think there would be so many questions one after the other! :oops: so my brain went fastforward! :w00t:
but yes i do have all them in place as i have parental controls but also my brother sorts our pc,s and laptops and he gave me advice and sorted stuff to help prevent things filtering and what to watch for a load of stuff he taught me actually and i do what he says with checks :thumbsup:
#6
I think parents should monitor what their kids do on the net, but as with anything parents cant be by their kids sides 24/7

How ever much you monitor there use at home they can easily access the net on mobiles or at friends houses etc

But yh i agree parents should be responsible for what their kids view on the net at home.
#7
mono2k6
what age do you think they can use the net unmoniterd?


I'd say you'd know your own child best, and it depends more on their development and understanding than their age.
#8
wulshaz
COM i got dizzy there! i have had a few glasses of wine but didnt think there would be so many questions one after the other! :oops: so my brain went fastforward! :w00t:
but yes i do have all them in place as i have parental controls but also my brother sorts our pc,s and laptops and he gave me advice and sorted stuff to help prevent things filtering and what to watch for a load of stuff he taught me actually and i do what he says with checks :thumbsup:


Sorry hun, I realised when I wrote it I kinda sounded as if I was at work lol

it wasn't meant to sound so dry and businesslike ;-)
#9
ClarityofMind
I'd say you'd know your own child best, and it depends more on their development and understanding than their age.


dont have any kids yet im 16 :-D
#10
mono2k6
dont have any kids yet im 16 :-D

ah ha see WHY arent you in bed sonny :) ;-)
#11
ClarityofMind
ah ha see WHY arent you in bed sonny :) ;-)


not tired :p
#12
mono2k6
not tired :p


lol, you're just like my own kids. ;-)
#13
one of mine is still playing the xbox fifa10 funny enough! :)
banned#14
Well kids are gonna find porn and dead people wether you put blocks and stuff on it. Only thing your going to get out of this is them being laughed at by their friends when they come over and they cant visit a "gaming" website because its been flagged/flagged because of gambling.

(I laughed at my friend when we couldnt play some penguin game lol, bear in mind that was like 6+ years ago)

EDIT: the "Internet" isnt like in the movies...Just because you open up the web browser...30 million pop-ups of porn, chat rooms and gambling windows are going to pop up. That NEVER happens..UNLESS your on a porn,chat room or casino related site.
#15
I let my son have unlimited access to the internet from when he turned 9, the only sites he ever looks at are Youtube for gaming cheats, Lego and ToysRus!!!

He has learnt some choice words from Youtube but we have explained that they are 'swear' words and not ones we would ever like to hear him come out with.

We do check his browsing history and so far he has never been anywhere he shouldn't (I suppose that will come later).
banned#16
KazzyD
I let my son have unlimited access to the internet from when he turned 9, the only sites he ever looks at are Youtube for gaming cheats, Lego and ToysRus!!!

He has learnt some choice words from Youtube but we have explained that they are 'swear' words and not ones we would ever like to hear him come out with.

We do check his browsing history and so far he has never been anywhere he shouldn't (I suppose that will come later).


Just dont let him ever find out...He will feel so betrayed and may hate you.
#17
CoMsy baby...you should also have added how they access the internet......

some parents buy their kids all the latest gadgets like laptops, netbooks, mobile phones etc ....

:)
banned#18
KazzyD

We do check his browsing history and so far he has never been anywhere he shouldn't (I suppose that will come later).


Right click, delete - isn't hard.

You should be checking the temporary internet folder for websites visited, though he's probably worked that one out too :whistling:
#19
StevenA2000_uk
CoMsy baby...you should also have added how they access the internet......

some parents buy their kids all the latest gadgets like laptops, netbooks, mobile phones etc ....

:)


Guilty lol
#20
ClarityofMind
Guilty lol


:roll:
#21
StevenA2000_uk
:roll:


But my girls are sensible.. they protect Mummy...

My 12 yr old says... "Mum, dont go into just ANY room in habbo... lemme come with you first... "

She thinks i'll be shocked bless her.

They use false names too. :)
#22
iver never been 'monitored' by my parents. but my dad doesnt know what a computer is and my mum can just about check her emails. My little sister likes to go on games and stuff so i watch what shes up to, she'll tend to make a facebook and then add people that dont know her so i make her delete it.

sound more protective than my parents!!but i think its only cos i understand it a lot more.
#23
deadduck_145
iver never been 'monitored' by my parents. but my dad doesnt know what a computer is and my mum can just about check her emails. My little sister likes to go on games and stuff so i watch what shes up to, she'll tend to make a facebook and then add people that dont know her so i make her delete it.

sound more protective than my parents!!but i think its only cos i understand it a lot more.


That's sweet hun xx
#24
My 13 year old is registered on this site, and she very often logs in, using wireless, from her laptop...

I don't 'monitor' her as such, but I do keep an eye on what she is doing. Thankfully, there are people I speak to on this site, who will let me know if she is wandering into murky water.
I think that if you censor everything, you are just making it more desirable..... :?

I would much rather my daughter come to me and ask about anything dodgy she sees.... lets face it, she will see it somewhere... at some point.... ( god knows I did, and not through the internet!!!)

I think that as long as you are both open enough to discuss anything... ?

I wanted her to watch 'to catch a pedophile' after it aired last week..... knowledge is power and all that.... :)
#25
personally i think using software to monitor your kids is a bit OTT, have the computer in the common living space so you can keep an eye on them but not spy as such. Educate them and talk about the dangers of weirdos on the net rather than keeping them on technological lock down. If you set the default parental filter on internet explorer that should be enough for most things really.
#26
lumoruk
Right click, delete - isn't hard.

You should be checking the temporary internet folder for websites visited, though he's probably worked that one out too :whistling:


So far he's not worked out that we can see where he's been, but we are both IT professionals so we know all the ways to check up on him :thumbsup:
banned#27
dcx_badass
Cookies folder is the one they normally miss.


I only know these from being caught out myself :whistling:

I decided to save up and buy my own computer
#28
dmh77

I think that if you censor everything, you are just making it more desirable..... :?


:thumbsup:
#29
dcx_badass
Cookies folder is the one they normally miss.


I worked that stuff out quite young, when i was like 12/13 years old. clear the cookies, delete temporary internet files, clear all history including the recent documents...i became a sort of pro at it after a while :-D I was like the first generation of kids to have computers in every classroom and have IT fully integrated into my education so I'm sure kids these days are just as clued up if not more!
#30
tinkerbell28
he has an astounding knowledge of IT at 6, really even at 2 he told me how to use a pc


Hmmm. 2? Not having that Tinks. Sorry.
#31
Krude1
I worked that stuff out quite young, when i was like 12/13 years old. clear the cookies, delete temporary internet files, clear all history including the recent documents...i became a sort of pro at it after a while :-D I was like the first generation of kids to have computers in every classroom and have IT fully integrated into my education so I'm sure kids these days are just as clued up if not more!


Absolutely they are :thumbsup:
#32
my pc is in the lounge, which is quite small, i can clearly see the monitor from the couch so can see whats going on, only my eldest has facebook which i know the log in details and can check, he doesnt care if i do, the other 2 have msn but again i check regulary, my 9 year old tells me whos shes adding etc, recently had someone she didnt know try to add her 3 times, she declined each time and on the last attempt blocked it, they all know the dangers and know never to give personal info, and only really play games and homework atm
#33
My daughter whos nearly 17 has one in her room.She is aware of the dangers and is very carefull.
She basically plays online games and homework.
Shes on facebook but she plays Yoville on it! lol

My son whos 8 ONLY plays on the desk top in the livingroom where i can see him and what he is doing at all times.
He knows the dangers as hes the one who tells me when other kids are giving out * personal info* he tells them off!

He plays online games, etc

I monitor him and we have strict parental controls up which basically block every website... we * allow* the ones he can go on.
#34
i have thought about this problem myself when the time arrives for me, and i think i'd setup the computer in the living room, then restrict the system initially so that they would only use it whilst parents are home. use an invisible proxy to track traffic (though I wouldnt actively monitor it) which would email them and me a list of the sites the visited each day. this way they would be aware that they are rigorously being tracked (but not blocked) and the would self regulate themselves out of fear of being caught and privileges removed.
#35
ascen
i have thought about this problem myself when the time arrives for me, and i think i'd setup the computer in the living room, then restrict the system initially so that they would only use it whilst parents are home. use an invisible proxy to track traffic (though I wouldnt actively monitor it) which would email them and me a list of the sites the visited each day. this way they would be aware that they are rigorously being tracked (but not blocked) and the would self regulate themselves out of fear of being caught and privileges removed.


The only thing with that is.. kids dont like being tracked and the more trust you give them, the more they rise within themselves to fulfil that trust.

Kinda like a partner saying" you're a cheat" and they say it so much... you think " well heck I may as well if they dont trust me?"
#37
It's so scary these days. My 5 year old now has his own web page via the school. Apparently it's a new government thing where every child has to have their own learning platform at school. My son now logs on, changes the way his page is displayed, adds new links to the sites he likes best, sends and receives e-mails to and from his friends. The school has said that they will be issuing homework via their web page very soon too.

All this at the age of 5. I just know that in a couple of years, he'll be more clued up than me and then what am I supposed to do?
#38
ClarityofMind
The only thing with that is.. kids dont like being tracked and the more trust you give them, the more they rise within themselves to fulfil that trust.

Kinda like a partner saying" you're a cheat" and they say it so much... you think " well heck I may as well if they dont trust me?"


you know that is a very valid point and i do actually agree.
#39
ascen
you know that is a very valid point and i do actually agree.


I've learnt this stuff by making all the mistakes in the book ;-)
#40
My son's 13 and before I get him anything or help him set accounts up like facebook & youtube ect he's always had to give me his passwords! I no lots of people will say thats ott but he truly understands my point of needing them, he knows I trust him it's just others I don't trust! I do check his browing history ect if I sense I need to and he knows that......I did however have to check my teenage nephews history on his pc for his mum, he'd taken a quick peek at a naughty site lol but as all the other children over heard they were all laughing and mocking him for being rude.....hence after a few more checks there's been no history of him visiting since lol

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