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is anyone drunk??

ceira*freya Avatar
7y, 7m agoPosted 7 years, 7 months ago
if your drunk u gotta tell a joke ........ lets all av a laugh x
ceira*freya Avatar
7y, 7m agoPosted 7 years, 7 months ago
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Comments/page:
#1
What is the difference between a blonde and “The Titanic”?
They know how many men went down on “The Titanic”
#2
coff101
What is the difference between a blonde and “The Titanic”?
They know how many men went down on “The Titanic”


and.. are u drunk?
#3
im drunk... but i cant post my jokes here. I'd get the death penalty. Fun

Love the comments at the "bottom" too.
#4
Jed Maxwell
im drunk... but i cant post my jokes here. I'd get the death penalty. Fun

Love the comments at the "bottom" too.


comments at the bottom??? im drunk... explain x
#5
Two goldfish in a tank

One says to the other "how do you drive this thing?" :)
#6
What have ricky hatton and gary glitter got in common??

On second thoughts.. nvm
#7
grex9101
Two goldfish in a tank

One says to the other "how do you drive this thing?" :)


lmao thats rubbish.. but I laughed. Not sure if it was the drink making me laugh or not... Ill have to read again in the morning..
#8
ceira*freya
comments at the bottom??? im drunk... explain x


ha ha ha ha ha ha fell on potato my **** lmfao
#9
2 muffins in an oven, one says to the other "Oh my God, it's hot in here", the other reply's "OH MY GOD A TALKING MUFFIN".
#10
Teacher draws a p enis on the blackboard.
"Does anyone know what that is?"
Yes says Tommy my dad has two. A small one for weeing and a big one for cleaning the babysitters teeth. :whistling:
#11
richp
Teacher draws a p enis on the blackboard.
"Does anyone know what that is?"
Yes says Tommy my dad has two. A small one for weeing and a big one for cleaning the babysitters teeth. :whistling:


lol
#12
A completely inebriated man was stumbling down the street with one foot on the curb and one foot in the gutter.

A cop pulled up and said, "I've got to take you in, pal. You're obviously drunk."

Our wasted friend asked, "Officer, are ya absolutely sure I'm drunk?"

"Yeah, buddy, I'm sure," said the copper. "Let's go."

Breathing a sigh of relief, the wino said, "Thank goodness, I thought I was crippled."
#13
One more then off for a bit of COD4

A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed.

He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom. While he's in there, the husband tells his wife:

"Listen, this guy's an escaped convict, look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck." If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you."

To which his wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He wwas whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked me if we had any vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too!!"
#14
little boy catches his ma and pa having sex.... the boy says ...mammy why are you bouncing on daddys tummy???...

mam says oh im just trying to get daddys beer belly flat

little boy says ... but mammy your wasting your time cos the babysitter just blows it back up again :-D
#15
coff101
2 muffins in an oven, one says to the other "Oh my God, it's hot in here", the other reply's "OH MY GOD A TALKING MUFFIN".


im drunk and dont get that im sorry im thick and drunk lol
#16
ceira*freya
little boy catches his ma and pa having sex.... the boy says ...mammy why are you bouncing on daddys tummy???...

mam says oh im just trying to get daddys beer belly flat

little boy says ... but mammy your wasting your time cos the babysitter just blows it back up again :-D


LOL :-D
#17
A Chicken and an egg lying in Bed. Chicken pulls the cigarette out of his mouth and says, " Well that answers that question"
#18
Wish i was drunk oh well two weeks time ill be battered and in 107. Whoo!
#19
Patient wakes up. Doctor says, " I've got some good news and some bad news"
Patient says, " Whats the good news?"
Doctor, " We managed to save your testicles"
Patient says, " That's great, I was really worried about that.... but whats the bad news?"
Doctor replies, " They're in a little bag under your pillow"
#20
RuthIess
Wish i was drunk oh well two weeks time ill be battered and in 107. Whoo!


aright mate wheres 107?
did u like that blu ray
#21
what do you call a scotsman that is almost home, but not quite?????


hamish!!!
#22
BIGBAWBAG
what do you call a scotsman that is almost home, but not quite?????


hamish!!!


That is guaranteed to go over the heads of ~90% of the people on here...
#23
haha hamish
#24
jonb2412
A Chicken and an egg lying in Bed. Chicken pulls the cigarette out of his mouth and says, " Well that answers that question"


LOL Very good, appealed to my sense of humour. :thumbsup:

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