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Joke Time :)

Tarby25 Avatar
8y, 9m agoPosted 8 years, 9 months ago
Whay are pirates called pirates................?
Tarby25 Avatar
8y, 9m agoPosted 8 years, 9 months ago
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Comments/page:
#1
Because they ARRGGGGHHHHHHHHHH :w00t:
#2
what????
#3
Taxi for tarby.
#4
Three old ladies and their dogs were sitting on a park bench having a quiet conversation when a flasher approached from across the park. The flasher came up to the ladies, stood right in front of them
and opened his trench coat.

Gertrude immediately had a stroke. Then Maude also had a stroke. But Tillie, being older and more feeble,
couldn't reach that far . . .:roll:
#5
Shengis - one for you!!:)
#6
t0mm
Taxi for tarby.


why is everyone stealing my lines! :giggle:
#7
Two Indians and an Irishman were walking through the woods. All of a sudden one of the Indians ran up a hill to the mouth of a small cave.
"Wooooo! Wooooo! Wooooo!" he called into the cave and listened closely until he heard an answering, "Wooooo! Wooooo! Woooooo!
He then tore off his clothes and ran into the cave.
The Irishman was puzzled and asked the remaining Indian what it was all
about.
"Was the other Indian crazy or what?"
The Indian replied "No, It is our custom during mating season when
Indian men see cave, they holler 'Wooooo! Wooooo! Wooooo!' into the opening.
If they get an answer back, it means there's a beautiful squaw in there waiting for us."
Just then they came upon another cave. The second Indian ran up to the
cave, stopped, and hollered, "Wooooo! Wooooo! Wooooo!"
Immediately, there was the answer. "Wooooo! Wooooo! Wooooo!" from deep
inside.
He also tore off his clothes and ran into the opening.
The Irishman wandered around in the woods alone for a while, and then spied a third large cave.
As he looked in amazement at the size of the huge opening, he was thinking,
"Hoo, man! Look at the size of this cave! It is bigger than those the Indians found.
There must be some really big, fine women in this cave!"
He stood in front of the opening and hollered with all his might
"Wooooo! Wooooo! Wooooo!"
Like the others, he then heard an answering call, "WOOOOOOOOO,
WOOOOOOOOO WOOOOOOOOO!"
With a gleam in his eye and a smile on his face, he raced into the cave,
tearing off his clothes as he ran. The following day, the headline of
the local newspaper read.....
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NAKED IRISHMAN RUN OVER BY TRAIN!!!
#8
what does Frank Bruno love Halo 3?

because hes an ex-Boxer

WOW *gets coats, suitcase and passport* :oops:

TAXI
#9
harvie316;1654945
TAXI


For this joke? No, a taxi is too expensive in this case. Rickshaw, rickshaw! harvie316 needs a rickshaw!:whistling:
#10
Predikuesi
For this joke? No, a taxi is too expensive in this case. Rickshaw, rickshaw! harvie316 needs a rickshaw!:whistling:

piggy back anyone:|
#11
A little girl is in line to see Santa. When it's her turn, she climbs up on Santa's lap. Santa asks, "What would you like Santa to bring you for Christmas?" The little girl replies, "I want a Barbie and a G.I. Joe."
Santa looks at the little girl for a moment and says, "I thought Barbie comes with Ken."

"No," said the little girl. "She comes with G.I. Joe, she fakes it with Ken."
#12
amcol
A little girl is in line to see Santa. When it's her turn, she climbs up on Santa's lap. Santa asks, "What would you like Santa to bring you for Christmas?" The little girl replies, "I want a Barbie and a G.I. Joe."
Santa looks at the little girl for a moment and says, "I thought Barbie comes with Ken."

"No," said the little girl. "She comes with G.I. Joe, she fakes it with Ken."


Swing and a miss...........:giggle:
#13
harvie316
Swing and a miss...........:giggle:


:? :|
#14
emasu
:? :|

its the equivalent of me saying TAXI FOR [insert name here] :|
#15
I thought it was quite funny lmao!!...then i get a taxi out of here...(wheres the icon with bottom lip lol)
#16
I have some, they aren't rude but maybe very slightly bad taste so I won't post them... but I'll post a couple.

What's black and white and eats like a horse?





















A zebra!
#17
What do you use a wombat for?
























Playing wom!
#18
Someone call a Medic, coz Duckmagic is on FIREEEEEEEEEEEEE!
#19
Ba dum dum Tish air drums
1 Like #20
This joke aint for everyone so if you feel disheartened, please don't take offence. This is one joke I remember:

One day, three sailors, Adam, Bob and Cartmen were caught by pirates. The pirates were hungry, so they stopped by an island and, because they wanted to be entertained as well, told the three to fetch 10 of any one fruit to eat each.
Adam came back first with 10 coconuts. The pirates sadistically told Adam to jam the 10 coconuts up his bottom and if he does that without showing any emotion, he will be freed. Adam only done 1 and gave up as he fell down in pain.
Bob, who overheard the challenge, came second with 10 small grapes and he was told to do the same. He was doing great, putting 8 on with straight face. The pirates thought so too, but then Bob laughed wildly, breaking his chance of freedom.
"Why are you laughing, you only had 2 left to go" asked the pirates.
Bob laughed and pointed "Cartmen is bringing back 10 pineapples!"
#21
I met a dutch girl with inflatable shoes the other day.















I rang her up to arrange a date but she'd popped her cloggs!!
#22
a scrooge was sitting in the train with a young lad sitting opposite him alone in the same carriage.
The young boy said "If my mother was a mummy elephant and my father was a daddy elephant then I must be a baby elephant"
After a while, the boy said "If my mother was a mummy giraffe and my father was a daddy giraffe then I must be a baby giraffe"
Again, after a while, the boy said "If my mother was a mummy lion and my father was a daddy lion, then I must be a baby lion"
The scrooge heard it all and was annoyed so much, he walked up to the boy and shouted:

"If your mother was a stupid dog and your father was an amputated hyena, then what are you?!







The boy replied: "then I must be a scrooge"
#23
From a packet of tablets for dogs marked:
"For animal use only." And then adds:
"May cause drowsiness. If so do not operate machinery or drive. Avoid alcohol."
#24
Two KGB agents are taking a walk in a Moscow suburb. One says to the other
"You know Dimitri, I have had training to make anyone, and I mean anyone talk through the power of the mind"
"Really? Prove it" Replies Pavel

Dimitri pointed to a long queue of people outside a Bakers shop.

"See that queue. I can make the owner come out and tell them that he has sold out. Watch"

Dimitri closed his eyes and concentrated on the shop. Sure enough after one minute the owner popped out and announced that he had completely sold out. The queue dispersed, but the people complaimned loudly that there was clearly plenty of bread for sale.

Both agents walked on.

"Hmm, impressive but I am still not convinced" said Pavel.

The two continued until they reached a miserable part of the city.

"See that apartment block?" Said Dimitri. "Well, just watch, I can make the owner of that one on the fifth floor throw out his TV"

"Go ahead" Said Pavel.
So Dimitri closed his eyes concentrated on the apartment. After two minutes nothing had happened.
"Ha! What rubbish" said Pavel.
Dimitri raised his hands skywards as if to invoke a deity. Five more minutes passed.
"Oh come on lets go. This just proves it's all rubbish" insisted Pavel

"One last try" Said Dimitri, and he screwed up his face and concentrated with all his might.

After two minutes a man ran to the fifth floor balcony screamining "WHAt DO YOU WANT FROM ME? i DON'T HAVE A TV!!!".

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