Q: If a plane crashed on the border of England and Scotland, where would they bury the survivors?
A: you don't bury survivors
Q: Twelve pears hanging high, twelve men passing by, each took a pear and left eleven hanging there. How can this be? How can eleven pears be left?
A: 'Each' is a mans name!
Q: If there's a frog, dead in the centre of a lilypad which is right in the middle of the pond, which side would it jump to?
A: neither, the frog is dead!
Q: You're a bus driver. At the first stop 4 people get on. At the second stop 8 people on, at the third stop 2 people get off and, at the forth stop everyone got off. The question is what color are the bus drivers eyes?
A: The same as yours, you're the bus driver.
Q: What never gets any wetter, no matter how much it rains?
A: The sea!
Q: A man went outside in the pouring rain with no protection, but not a hair on his head got wet...how come?
A: He was bald.
Q: David's father has three sons : Snap, Crackle and _____ ?