Man thrown out of Glasgow nightclub - HotUKDeals
We use cookie files to improve site functionality and personalisation. By continuing to use HotUKDeals, you accept our cookie and privacy policy.
Get the HotUKDeals app free at Google Play

Search Error

An error occurred when searching, please try again!

Login / Sign UpSubmit
Expired

Man thrown out of Glasgow nightclub

£0.00 @
Guy goes into a nightclub with a tub of play doh and some cookie cutters. Bouncers ejected him for throwing shapes on the dancefloor. Read More
barky Avatar
7y, 3w agoPosted 7 years, 3 weeks ago
Guy goes into a nightclub with a tub of play doh and some cookie cutters.

Bouncers ejected him for throwing shapes on the dancefloor.
Tags:
barky Avatar
7y, 3w agoPosted 7 years, 3 weeks ago
Options

All Comments

(34) Jump to unreadPost a comment
Comments/page:
#1
Barky - your showing your age btw:-D

That joke is MEGA CHEEEEEEZZZZYYY!!!!
#2
boom boom
#3
Guy walks into a nightclub with a cadaver and some helium.

Bouncers ejected him for body poppin on the dance floor.

(sorry... just made that up) bored
#4
http://www.tvini.com/images/misc/RPG/laughing_cat.gif
#5
A mushroom walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender says, "I
can't serve you." The mushroom says, "Why not? I'm a fun-guy."
#6
shedboy66
A mushroom walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender says, "I
can't serve you." The mushroom says, "Why not? I'm a fun-guy."


thats worse than mine!
#7
barky
thats worse than mine!


well barky thats debatable......................haha
#8
a dinosaur walks into a pub, the barman says WTF you doin out your wheelchair
#9
Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married.
The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.
#10
guy comes home with a broken leg-wife asks "how did this happen?"

guy says "I caught your sister using a vibrator"

wife "and how do you break your leg doing that?"

guy "I fell off the ladder"
#11
A pony walks into a bar and says "Bartender, may I have a drink?"

Bartender says "What? I can't hear you. Speak up!"

"May I please have a drink?"

"What? You have to speak up!"

"Could I please have a drink?"

"Now listen, if you don't speak up I will not serve you."

"I'm sorry, I'm just a little hoarse."
#12
Did you hear about the boat full of burgundy paint that crashed into a deserted island?

The crew was completely marooned!
#13
michelleleemoo
Did you hear about the boat full of burgundy paint that crashed into a deserted island?

The crew was completely marooned!


Ive suddenly lost the will to live:p
#14
A man walks into a bar with a roll of tarmac under his arm and says: "Pint please, and one for the road."
#15
If This Carries On Im Going Back In The Box!!!
#16
There is this bear, right, and he walks into a bar. He goes up to the bartender and says "Can I have a large Gin and . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Tonic Please?"

The Barman replies "Yeah sure, but what's with the big pause?"

The bear holds up his paws and says "I'm a bear!!"
#17
barky
Ive suddenly lost the will to live:p


you started it :roll:
#18
shedboy66
A man walks into a bar with a roll of tarmac under his arm and says: "Pint please, and one for the road."


Im warning you-I will send the dalmatian round!:-D
#19
A man walks into a pub, goes up to the bar "Pint of your best" he says to the bar man.

Whilst waiting for his drink he notices that Vincent Van Gogh is sitting at one of the tables. He goes up to him and says "Are you Vincent Van Gogh?"

"Yes" the old man replies.

"Do you want a pint?"

"No, ta. I've got one `ere."
#20
What is green and has wheels?

Grass





























I was just kiddin' about the wheels.
#21
barky
Im warning you-I will send the dalmatian round!:-D


was gonna say my Jack Russell will sort out the dalmation but my so called guard dog would probably invite yours in for a cup of tea and a slice of pedigree chum :-D
#22
A penguin walks into a bar, he goes to the counter and asks the barman "Have you seen my brother?".

The barman asks "What does he look like?".
#23
2 chimpanzees in the bathroom
first one says"ooooo eeeee eeeeee aaaaah"

second one says "just put some cold water in"
#24
A duck walks into a bar and asks the barman “have you got any bread?”. The barman says “We dont sell bread I’m afraid, this is a pub, we sell beer”. The duck leaves.

The next day the walks back into the same bar and asks the same barman “have you got any bread?”. The barman looks a little annoyed and says “Like I told you yesterday, we dont do bread, we’re a pub”, so the duck leaves.

The next day the same duck walks into the same bar, and asks the same barman “have you got any bread?”.The barman looks really annoyed and says “Look we dont do bread, we’re a pub and if you keep coming in here asking for bread I’ll nail your beak to the bar” so the duck leaves.

The following day the duck once again walks into bar. He asks the barman “have you got any nails?”. The barman looks perplexed and replies “No”. The duck then asks “Have you got any bread?”.
#25
two muffins are baking in the oven... one turns to the other and says "boy it's hot in here!" other muffin responds "OMG A TALKING MUFFIN!!!!!"
#26
Knock knock: Who's there?

Banana.

Banana who?

Knock knock: Who's there?

Banana.

Banana who?

Knock knock: Who's there?

Banana.

Banana who?

Knock knock: Who's there?

Orange.

Orange who?

Orange you glad I didn't say banana!
#27
3 pieces of string go into the pub, 1st piece of string says he will get the round in, "3 beers please" he asks and the barman asks "are you a piece of string" and he replies he is "sorry we dont serve string in here"
2nd piece of string goes to the bar and asks for 3 beers and again gets told they dont serve string in the pub
the 3rd piece of string says "watch me" so he says "3 beers please" and again the barman asks "are you a piece of string" and the string says no "im a frayed knot"
#28
i just bought an egyptian doorbell, yep you just toot-and-come-in
#29
*soz if this offends*

What's black and white and red all over, and sits in a corner getting smaller and smaller?





























An emo kid with a vegetable peeler.
#30
A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed.

He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom. While he's in there, the husband tells his wife:

"Listen, this guy's an escaped convict, look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck." If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you."

To which his wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He was whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked me if we had any vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too!!"
#31
The worst joke I have ever heard was in my little boys greatest every joke book.....

Whats the difference between peanut butter and a ghost....



A ghost doesn't stick to the roof of your mouth!


WTF?! So figure that out....
banned#32
Guy walks into the chemist and asks for some contraceptive pills for his 12 year old daughter.

Chemist looks and him for a second and says " Your daughter is sexually active at the age of 12!?!"

The man replies: "Nah she just lies there like her mother."
#33
My mate has a disease where he can't stop buying music and DVD's then saying how good they are.

He's HMV positive.
#34
What's invisible and smells of worms?








Bird farts!

Post a Comment

You don't need an account to leave a comment. Just enter your email address. We'll keep it private.

...OR log in with your social account

...OR comment using your social account

Thanks for your comment! Keep it up!
We just need to have a quick look and it will be live soon.
The community is happy to hear your opinion! Keep contributing!