my father has found me :) im meeting him friday and im nervous :( - HotUKDeals
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my father has found me :) im meeting him friday and im nervous :(

£0.00 @
my mum left my dad when she was pregnant with me and she never allowed him acces and i grew up thinking my step dad was my real father, they told me when i was 11,i started writing to my dad but my m…
edjaned Avatar
8y, 1m agoPosted 8 years, 1 month ago
my mum left my dad when she was pregnant with me and she never allowed him acces and i grew up thinking my step dad was my real father,
they told me when i was 11,i started writing to my dad but my mum shortly put an end to it and she told me to tell him i wasnt interested anymore
then a few days ago i was told he has been trying to find me for a long time,spoke to my dad on monday and have made plans to meet him on friday so im driving over to walsall.
im also one of 11 children and have a big family to meet which is going to be strange as i have a distant relationship with my parents here

anyone else been through the same thing?
edjaned Avatar
8y, 1m agoPosted 8 years, 1 month ago
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#1
think of all the CSA he's gotta give you, lol
#2
wow. good luck with it.
banned#3
OMG...another 'Trisha' moment!

And as if its not bad enough you then say your metting in....WALSALL!!!




seriously though...good luck hun, hope it all goes well for you xxx
#4
wickedteen
think of all the CSA he's gotta give you, lol


lol i dont think he has any money
#5
why odb what is walsall like?they all live there?
banned#6
edjaned;4358728
why odb what is walsall like?they all live there?


ever heard of Beirut?
#7
ODB_69
OMG...another 'Trisha' moment!

And as if its not bad enough you then say your metting in....WALSALL!!!




seriously though...good luck hun, hope it all goes well for you xxx


edjaned, you might need an interpreter ............... lol
banned#8
smithyp1;4358747
edjaned, you might need an interpreter ............... lol


looooooooooooooooooooooooooool


yam yams :lol:
#9
Good luck, I hope it all goes well for you!
#10
Good luck honey xx Grew up thinking my step dad was my real dad until I was told at 18 (!) he wasn't and always wondered about meeting my real dad etc but have always been too scared he wouldn't wanna know... Anyways... really happy for you and I hope things go well :) xx
#11
Blimey, it's all happening here, isn't it? Good luck, did he sound nice?
[helper]#12
Good luck - must be feeling a whole range of emotions, your dad too. I'm sure he will understand about your mum putting pressure on. Just remember there are 2 sides to every story and so far you've only heard your mum's side........
#13
Meeting in Walsall......I'd be nervous too :lol:

Seriously though, good luck hun :thumbsup:
#14
Wow, im currently trying to get into contact with my dad only after like 7-8 years though, but seriously

good luck i hope it goes really well for you!
#15
sadiebabes
Good luck honey xx Grew up thinking my step dad was my real dad until I was told at 18 (!) he wasn't and always wondered about meeting my real dad etc but have always been too scared he wouldn't wanna know... Anyways... really happy for you and I hope things go well :) xx


Hey, I grew up without my dad from the age of 6, always wondered if I should look etc, didn't really know how to start... Sadly the next time we "met" was at his funeral and I'm left with many what if's... Go find him, at least you will know one way or the other. xxxx
#16
He'll be just as nervous as you. He's been carrying his 'baggage' your whole life.
#17
I really hope that it all goes well for you. It'd be good for you to have some supportive family. All the best xx
#18
good luck. i dont know who my real dad is. i guess it doesnt help that my birth mother doesnt either.
banned#19
LOL @ the Walsall comments hahahahah


Edjaned, have a look at this - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Walsall

its ok really there
#20
Hope it goes well, and even if it doesn't work out, at least you've gone and given it a chance xx
#21
Just remember your dad will be nervous too and the other family members youve yet too meet.
good luck
the 1st meeting will be hard but it will get easier
[mod]#22
good luck x hope all goes well :)
#23
Nothing ventured nothing gained as my dear old Nan would say

Best of luck when meeting your dad
#24
wow, it will be a big day for you.

i hope things work out well for you.

the only advice i can give is, try not to have too many pre-conceived ideas about what he is going to be like or the rest of your family or even the day itself.

I know you must feel excited and nervous and even a little scared.

It may well feel quite overwhelming at first. Take it easy and let us all know how it goes for you.

I'll be thinking of you xx
#25
thanks for all the well wishes x x
he sounds nice,and said alot of nice things which was hard to take in as i never had a close relationship with my step dad,my step dad would just drive past me as i would be walking home from school lol
i do get on better with my step dad now but have always found i couldnt talk to him and there is always an comfortable silence when alone in same room as him

i do know that my real dad has been bad in the past and has made alot of mistakes and a couple of stints in jail but everyone deserves a second chance and i will take him as i find him
its obvious they are not a wealthy family but neither are we lol
i have never blamed him or judged him i know exactly what my mum is like and i believe it to be her fault not his
1 Like #26
edjaned
thanks for all the well wishes x x
he sounds nice,and said alot of nice things which was hard to take in as i never had a close relationship with my step dad,my step dad would just drive past me as i would be walking home from school lol
i do get on better with my step dad now but have always found i couldnt talk to him and there is always an comfortable silence when alone in same room as him

i do know that my real dad has been bad in the past and has made alot of mistakes and a couple of stints in jail but everyone deserves a second chance and i will take him as i find him
its obvious they are not a wealthy family but neither are we lol
i have never blamed him or judged him i know exactly what my mum is like and i believe it to be her fault not his


try not to take sides between mum and dad as it all happened a long time ago and may not even be relevant to now.

speaking as a mum, mothers can go to crazy lengths to protect their children. she may have believed it was in your best interests to do what she did. you can only surmise.

i think its wonderful you have this opportunity as this man is indeed part of you. just take it as it comes and try to enjoy it. remember this will be a difficult time for your mum too. xxx
#27
edjaned - from what you've said above, I think your father will be in for a pleasant surprise. He's probably much more nervous than you about the meeting, but your non-judgemental attitude is bound to make him very happy. I hope you'll be equally happy with his response.Best of luck to you both. :thumbsup:
#28
Good luck with this, as everyone else said, I am sure there will be nerves on both sides.

But remember this! Your Mum left him (and she must have had her reasons), but he never gave up looking for you or wanting to be a part of your life. Even after your Mum made you stop writing when you were 11, he has been looking for you for a long time.


How many men would have done that? I think he sounds alrught, your Dad.:-D


Blow inheriting 11 siblings though!!!!! :shock::shock::shock: Christmas will cost you a fortune from now on!
#29
Go with an open mind...

I wish you luck! :thumbsup:
#30
good luck hope it all works out for you :thumbsup:
#31
Good luck I will be thinking of you xxx :friends:
1 Like #32
Jan, you are such a lovely lady, always putting everyone else's wants and needs before your own, I hope that this meeting turns out well and gives you a whole lot of love. It's very good that your dad wants to meet you. Go and see him with a really positive attitude. I've never been in a similar situation but I think that everyone should be able to choose to know their parents if they want to.
Re Walsall. One of the nicest people I know comes from there but it has a huge roundabout which they've been re-constructing for ever. If they haven't finished and you get lost, ask a local ; they're so used to it ( lost drivers) and they're friendly and helpful
#33
chesso
Jan, you are such a lovely lady, always putting everyone else's wants and needs before your own, I hope that this meeting turns out well and gives you a whole lot of love. It's very good that your dad wants to meet you. Go and see him with a really positive attitude. I've never been in a similar situation but I think that everyone should be able to choose to know their parents if they want to.
Re Walsall. One of the nicest people I know comes from there but it has a huge roundabout which they've been re-constructing for ever. If they haven't finished and you get lost, ask a local ; they're so used to it ( lost drivers) and they're friendly and helpful


yes, midlanders are lovely ( ex brummie lol )
banned#34
chesso;4359641
Re Walsall. One of the nicest people I know comes from there but it has a huge roundabout which they've been re-constructing for ever. If they haven't finished and you get lost, ask a local ; they're so used to it ( lost drivers) and they're friendly and helpful


Think the Romans first started the adjustments cause its been going on since the supposed birth of Christ tbh
#35
Wow - what a story! I hope that this is the start of something wonderful for you all. Good Luck on Friday, I hope that it all goes well for you :). x
#36
you'll be ok ed , wish ya luck :)



.......wear a hat tho , a ginger might be too much for him ;-)
#37
Wow, how exciting (and scary at the same time) wish you all the luck in the world and hope it all goes great big hugs x x x x
#38
Wow ! Hes never forgot you even though he has 11 children and hasn't stopped looking. You mean alot to him by the soiund of it. Good luck and enjoy it x
#39
As nervous as you may be, the emotional gratification you will get from finally meeting with your dad will far outway any nervousness.

I wish you all the best and hope that it goes really well for you. :-D
#40
Hope it goes well for you. :thumbsup:

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