Not much going on so... joke time anyone? - HotUKDeals
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Not much going on so... joke time anyone?

jonb2412 Avatar
7y, 2m agoPosted 7 years, 2 months ago
An oldy but goody to start the ball rolling:

An inflatable boy lives in his inflatable house with his inflatable mum and dad. His inflatable mum and dad are always giving him a hard time... and one day he cracks.....He pulls out his inflatable knife and stabs his inflatable mum and dad.. then he runs off. He finds himself at his inflatable school, and stood in the inflatable entrance is the inflatable headmaster. Straight away the inflatable headmaster starts having a go at him.

"That's it!" he thought, and he pulls out his inflatable knife and stabs the inflatable headmaster. As he runs off he stabs the inflatable school and then runs back home and hides in his inflatable bedroom.

Soon he hears sirens and the inflatable police turn up in their inflatable cars. He hears them calling to him through their inflatable megaphones and thinks... "I have no choice"

He pulls out his inflatable knife and stabs himself.

In the morning he wakes up and finds himself in the inflatable hospital with the inflatable headmaster stood over him saying......

" You've let your mum and dad down, you've let me down, you've let the school down.... but worst of all..... you've let yourself down!"

jonb2412 Avatar
7y, 2m agoPosted 7 years, 2 months ago

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and so you should be:oops:
what a load of hot air :p:thumbsup::santa:
A bit long winded, but good punch line....

john has had enough of the rat race and buys a sheep farm in australia. Sitting on the veranda one evening he sees a small dust cloud on the horizon. Over the next hour it gets closer and closer until he sees it is a beat up old truck. The truck pulls up and a middle age man gets out and walks over.

'g'day, I am you neighbour bruce from the next farm, just over that ridge there. Nice to meet ya. thought i would have a party to welcome you to the neighbourhood.'

thats awfully good of you, when is it.

next saturday seems to be the day. but before you come you should know that there are a few rules for parties round here, just in case you are a funny sort.
first - there is going to be plenty of drink, alcohol only, so expect to get drunk.

fine by me (thinks great)

second - when people get drunk there is usually a fight.

Oh, right (although a little worried)

and last of all, when people get drunk and get together out here, people have sex

OK (perks up again)

right, I'll see you next saturday and dont forget to bring some beer.

OK, and by the way, what sort of dress code is it - smart / casual ?

Wear what you like, it'll just be the two of us !

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