Och aye the poo!!! - HotUKDeals
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Och aye the poo!!!

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banned5y, 6m agoPosted 5 years, 6 months ago
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A FUMING bride DECKED her kilt-wearing hubby when he sat on her knee at the reception and left a SKIDMARK on her wedding dress! Like all true Scotsmen, Angus McClure, 26, didn't wear pants under his kilt when he married sweetheart Sarah Grant in Greenock, Renfrewshire.

Dirty dirty man!

http://www.shoutingatco.ws/blog/category/media/newspapers/sport-story-of-the-week/

.
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banned5y, 6m agoPosted 5 years, 6 months ago
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banned#1
1 Like #2
pics or it didn't happen
#3
lol... happens to the best of us lol

answer :

http://derricksondish.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/05/cottonelle-fresh-wipes.jpg
banned 2 Likes #4
Of course its true. It was in the paper. Frankie Boyle just said it 'cos it was funny and disgusting at the same time.

http://www.shoutingatco.ws/blog/wp-content/uploads/2011/05/051011_1835_1.jpg

Edited By: guv on May 24, 2011 13:49: image
#5
guv
Of course its true. It was in the paper. Frankie Boyle just said it 'cos it was funny and disgusting at the same time.

Thats not like Frankie Boyle
1 Like #6
Rupz
lol... happens to the best of us lol

answer :

http://derricksondish.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/05/cottonelle-fresh-wipes.jpg


or

http://toiletbrush.org/wp-content/uploads/toilet-brush.jpg
banned 1 Like #7
I just tried to find a picture for numpty with a groom wearing a kilt sitting on the brides knee.

For some reason I couldn't find one! I guess this event is well documented and no further chances being taken! X)
#8
Ewww why do some Men have a problem wiping their backsides properly,that's gross!!
#9
deb8z
Ewww why do some Men have a problem wiping their backsides properly,that's gross!!


Thats the same question I keep asking (mostly after each time I have to clean his bathroom!).
Mr999 reckons all blokes stand up to wipe their bottom.. apparently only girls sit down. oO
1 Like #10
Nikki999
deb8z
Ewww why do some Men have a problem wiping their backsides properly,that's gross!!

Thats the same question I keep asking (mostly after each time I have to clean his bathroom!).
Mr999 reckons all blokes stand up to wipe their bottom.. apparently only girls sit down. oO

They stand up lol, i've never heard that before,i will have to ask my OH,i've no idea what he does.

I am actually lolling at asking him this question,he'll think i'm nuts!!
#11
classy wedding
#12
deb8z
Nikki999
deb8z
Ewww why do some Men have a problem wiping their backsides properly,that's gross!!


Thats the same question I keep asking (mostly after each time I have to clean his bathroom!).
Mr999 reckons all blokes stand up to wipe their bottom.. apparently only girls sit down. oO


They stand up lol, i've never heard that before,i will have to ask my OH,i've no idea what he does.

I am actually lolling at asking him this question,he'll think i'm nuts!!



am just howling here!!!

Men stand up to wipe their bum oOX)

brb off to text my husband
#13
deb8z
Nikki999
deb8z
Ewww why do some Men have a problem wiping their backsides properly,that's gross!!


Thats the same question I keep asking (mostly after each time I have to clean his bathroom!).
Mr999 reckons all blokes stand up to wipe their bottom.. apparently only girls sit down. oO


They stand up lol, i've never heard that before,i will have to ask my OH,i've no idea what he does.

I am actually lolling at asking him this question,he'll think i'm nuts!!


I insist you ask every man you know as I need more evidence for my argument that everyone should sit down.. Unless the bathroom needs to resemble something out of Trainspotting that is.
I may even ask my Dad.. Im sure he wouldnt think anything of me asking such a question......
1 Like #14
Don't tell me bossy is actually gonna text her hubby and ask lol !!!
#15
deb8z
Don't tell me bossy is actually gonna text her hubby and ask lol !!!


Hope so, Im gonna start a poo database now!
banned#16
....and this drunken brawl took place at the "temperance" hall....lol
banned 1 Like #17
The (Scottish) lady at work who emailed the story also sent me the reply she received from a buddy. It's like a foreign language! X)

ALWAYS dicht yur erse richt when waerin a kilt!

Hey numbty was the story in the link above this story anything to do with you? X)
2 Likes #18
deb8z
Don't tell me bossy is actually gonna text her hubby and ask lol !!!


No I didnt - thought it might be inappropriate that in middle of conducting a funeral he gets a text from his wife asking if he stands up when wiping his bum :)
#19
you kind of half stand up/sit down haha....maybe crouch or squat are more approriate terms lol

how the hell do you wipe without getting up from the seat? lol


Edited By: numptyj on May 24, 2011 17:11
banned#20
numptyj
you kind of half stand up/sit down haha....maybe crouch or squat are more approriate terms lol

how the hell do you wipe without getting up from the seat? lol



Bidet.

Nothing quite like a little warm squirt up ya bum! X)
#21
numptyj
you kind of half stand up/sit down haha....maybe crouch or squat are more approriate terms lol

how the hell do you wipe without getting up from the seat? lol



noooooooo, so you're another one then!?
I dunno, he reckons he cant sit either.. he went moaning on about the length of his arms and something about the seat!?!?
.. I dunno, it grossed me out thinking about it so I think my ears went on an immediate shut down oO Urgh!
1 Like #22
Aw naw I wish I didny read this, I'm eating ma cottage pie and it tastes funny noo oO
1 Like #23
For the data-base:
To the question,'You don't stand up to wipe do you?'
My hubby, 'Good grief, no.'

Re the wedding - words fail me.
banned#24
chesso
For the data-base:
To the question,'You don't stand up to wipe do you?'
My hubby, 'Good grief, no.'

inb4 pics or ya lying! X)
#25
guv
chesso
For the data-base:
To the question,'You don't stand up to wipe do you?'
My hubby, 'Good grief, no.'


inb4 pics or ya lying! X)


Let's see you on the bidet first.
http://i261.photobucket.com/albums/ii78/chesso_photos/animated%20smilies/laughing023.gif

Oh, on second thoughts .... let's abandon the data base all together.
banned 2 Likes #26
chesso
guv
chesso
For the data-base:
To the question,'You don't stand up to wipe do you?'
My hubby, 'Good grief, no.'

inb4 pics or ya lying! X)

Let's see you on the bidet first.
http://i261.photobucket.com/albums/ii78/chesso_photos/animated%20smilies/laughing023.gif

Oh, on second thoughts .... let's abandon the data base all together.


Too late, I'd already taken the photo..... your turn!

http://bidettoiletseatreviews.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/02/Sitting_on_a_bidet2.jpg
#27
Looks like some take their trousers off!!!
#28
I stand up. Just to add to the debate!!
3 Likes #29
im confused about people wiping their bums LOL.

do you girls look like the cartoon guy on the bottom right? cos thats how I would look whislt wiping lol.

That is more standing up than sitting no?

(lol at the cartoon if you actually read it, I was just using it for visual purposes)

http://www.cheatengine.org/forum/files/dont_forget_to_wipe_your_ass_folks_960.jpeg

Edited By: numptyj on May 24, 2011 18:03
banned#30
Using toilet paper alone is quite unhygienic in itself, you're just smearing your crap over your entire anus.
#31
numptyj
im confused about people wiping their bums LOL.

do you girls look like the cartoon guy on the bottom right? cos thats how I would look whislt wiping lol.

That is more standing up than sitting no?

(lol at the cartoon if you actually read it, I was just using it for visual purposes)

http://www.cheatengine.org/forum/files/dont_forget_to_wipe_your_ass_folks_960.jpeg

I got banned for posting that on another forum years ago X)
#32
HA! that is all
banned#33
Adnan786
Using toilet paper alone is quite unhygienic in itself, you're just smearing your crap over your entire anus.


It you use one sheet and finish, you'd have a good point, but either way it's surely better than crap under your finger nails!
banned#34
LoveHearts
numptyj
im confused about people wiping their bums LOL.

do you girls look like the cartoon guy on the bottom right? cos thats how I would look whislt wiping lol.

That is more standing up than sitting no?

(lol at the cartoon if you actually read it, I was just using it for visual purposes)

http://www.cheatengine.org/forum/files/dont_forget_to_wipe_your_ass_folks_960.jpeg

I got banned for posting that on another forum years ago X)


quick...... see if you can get numpty banned on this one too! X)
banned#35
guv
Adnan786
Using toilet paper alone is quite unhygienic in itself, you're just smearing your crap over your entire anus.


It you use one sheet and finish, you'd have a good point, but either way it's surely better than crap under your finger nails!


Having long finger nails is quite unhygienic too. Sorry i didnt realise you didnt wash your hands. Quite unhygienic too.
#36
Who are they kidding with point 3, surely the second change should just be turning them inside out, only one change of underwear that way, saves a forune in cleaning and is a bit greener for the environment.
1 Like #37
numptyj
im confused about people wiping their bums LOL.

do you girls look like the cartoon guy on the bottom right? cos thats how I would look whislt wiping lol.

That is more standing up than sitting no?

(lol at the cartoon if you actually read it, I was just using it for visual purposes)



No, I stay sitting on the loo... nothing like the fella in the cartoon, that is standing.
I guess if you have a bigger bum you'd have no choice but to stand, or shuffle to the edge to stay sat!? I don't know why you would need to crouch/get off.. if it be personal choice or necessity.. How did I get into this! :|
lol @ the cartoon pic btw!
banned#38
Adnan786
guv
Adnan786
Using toilet paper alone is quite unhygienic in itself, you're just smearing your crap over your entire anus.


It you use one sheet and finish, you'd have a good point, but either way it's surely better than crap under your finger nails!


Having long finger nails is quite unhygienic too. Sorry i didnt realise you didnt wash your hands. Quite unhygienic too.


Your apology is accepted. Don't do it again.
banned#39
I stay seated.lean over on to my left cheek and wipe away. Use about half a roll each time.
banned 1 Like #40
guv
Adnan786
guv
Adnan786
Using toilet paper alone is quite unhygienic in itself, you're just smearing your crap over your entire anus.


It you use one sheet and finish, you'd have a good point, but either way it's surely better than crap under your finger nails!


Having long finger nails is quite unhygienic too. Sorry i didnt realise you didnt wash your hands. Quite unhygienic too.


Your apology is accepted. Don't do it again.


Its ok, I wont, your confirmation of how disgustingly vile you are was worth 'apologising' for.

P.s when you get a moment, google facetious.

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