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Some advice from parents about working and benefits etc

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Hey all, im really struggling to get my head round some stuff. What do parents do when they both work, and have a little one to bring up? I dont really want to put my boy into a nursery as he … Read More
aircanman Avatar
7y, 9m agoPosted 7 years, 9 months ago
Hey all, im really struggling to get my head round some stuff.

What do parents do when they both work, and have a little one to bring up?

I dont really want to put my boy into a nursery as he is only 9 months, but is there something I can do if my wife can look after him on a fulltime basis? Obviously like being a housewife or something. Because I dont think its financially viable for us both to work and pay for nursery costs, or for us to share work and work odd days here and there if you know what I mean and take turns looking after the little one.

Any advice?
aircanman Avatar
7y, 9m agoPosted 7 years, 9 months ago
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#1
I'm not really sure I understand this bit..,
but is there something I can do if my wife can look after him on a fulltime basis? Obviously like being a housewife or something.


What do you mean...something you can do like being a housewife? Do you mean benefits you can claim?

But this link may possibly help.
http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/Parents/Childcare/DG_4016029

Hope you manage to get sorted one way of the other though.
#2
Not sure what you arelooking for advice wise. Either you both work and leave the baby with someone else or one works and one says at home. As for benefits you should look at tax credits.
Some useful info here: http://www.mybabyandme.co.uk/benefits.htm
#3
bellabonkers
I'm not really sure I understand this bit..,

What do you mean...something you can do like being a housewife? Do you mean benefits you can claim?

But this link may possibly help.
http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/Parents/Childcare/DG_4016029

Hope you manage to get sorted one way of the other though.


hey, thanks for the reply. Well, what I mean, is there a way my wife can look after the baby full time, and possibly be a benefit for this? As its not really viable for us both to work or for him to be in a creche etc. Im confused on this one!
#4
as far as am aware theres notthing there if you both are working,I woudnt like the idea of putting a 9 months old child in to nursery i know exactley what you mean,

if you think you can afford to look after ur lil1 leave your job as familes 1st ull always find another job but you dont want to miss out on bringing up ur lil 1 its a good experiance
#5
aircanman
hey, thanks for the reply. Well, what I mean, is there a way my wife can look after the baby full time, and possibly be a benefit for this? As its not really viable for us both to work or for him to be in a creche etc. Im confused on this one!


Have you thought about a childminder? They are generally a fair bit cheaper than nurseries. Or perhaps your wife might consider becoming a childminder herself if she can't bare to be parted from the little one.
#6
maybe you can recruit a child minder from here lol
#7
I thought that what grand perents were for :p
#8
Only thing I can think of is child benefit?
http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/MoneyTaxAndBenefits/TaxCreditsandChildBenefit/Childbenefits/index.htm
If you continue to work then you will get tax credits if you satisfy the conditiions for this.
Once your wife is looking for work again she may qualify for contribution related jobseekers allowance. depending on the National Insurance contributions she has made and when.
#9
hope it all goes well it can be fustrating as i still face it with my 5 yr old at times as we both work and scholl pick ups,drop offs, and in the evening she goes tution and its like few miles away and not like the neighbor can do me favours all the time



if you work shifts maybe that could be something to consider
#10
Just to clarify, as I understand it you both earn enough to pay for childcare but what would be the point of working just to pay somebody else to look after your child, you might as well do it yourself and get money from everyone else who has to go out and work :p
#11
Welcome to the real world.
You have kids you have to pay for them!
Unbelievable!
banned#12
you can get working tax credit if you are on a low wage (around £16K)

eneter different scenarios here to get a FULL list of what you can claim for:-

http://www.entitledto.co.uk/
#13
unfortunately kids dont come cheap and there are lots of sacrifices and benefits from actually having them.
by law employers have to consider flexible working for parents but its a sad way out of giving up work because its more income beneficial for not to work and live on benefits,
unfortunaely thats the government to blame.
you are going to be worse off anyway now with extra outgoings etc more clothes/food to buy etc
you can get help with childcare costs
weve got 3 kids and work long hours but we'd rather work than scrounge off the government
there was always someone to help be it an aupair, parents or childcare
banned#14
jasonrat;5955014
unfortunately kids dont come cheap and there are lots of sacrifices and benefits from actually having them.
by law employers have to consider flexible working for parents but its a sad way out of giving up work because its more income beneficial for not to work and live on benefits,
unfortunaely thats the government to blame.
you are going to be worse off anyway now with extra outgoings etc more clothes/food to buy etc
you can get help with childcare costs
weve got 3 kids and work long hours but we'd rather work than scrounge off the government
there was always someone to help be it an aupair, parents or childcare

don't you mean scrounge off the taxpayer ;-)
#15
thanks for all the helpful posts, im basically confused looking for options, I dont want to scrounge or anything, ive paid my taxes long enough thank you very much (to the comments about scrounging)

At the end of the day, we are all taking taxpayers money by using NHS, the footpaths, driving cars etc, so having a benefit is just a way of getting a little back from paying in so many years!
#16
aircanman
thanks for all the helpful posts, im basically confused looking for options, I dont want to scrounge or anything, ive paid my taxes long enough thank you very much (to the comments about scrounging)

At the end of the day, we are all taking taxpayers money by using NHS, the footpaths, driving cars etc, so having a benefit is just a way of getting a little back from paying in so many years!


I think the point others are trying to make is that you shouldn't be considering quitting your job to get benefits, child or not. Taxes are meant to be there for those who are out of work through no fault of their own, i.e. Redundancy but are still actively seeking work.
#17
getting benefits will all depend on how much you earn. I stopped work to bring up my 3 children and the only thing we have ever been entitled to is child benefit. If you are lucky enough to be able to live on one wage, either your or your wifes, then do it. I personally dont agree with having a baby only to put them in childcare as soon as they come along.....that is my personal opinion and know its down to individual choice.
#18
I totally know where you are coming from, I have a 10 month old, my other half works 60+ hours a week, and im a stay at home mum, living on one wage is hard, so im due to go back to work and do 2 days a week (mother in law is babysitting)

We get child tax credit only as we couldnt get working tax credit, but its quite a bit so its worth looking into, also your OH could clain JSA while she is looking for a part time job?

And as for people saying scrounge of the taxpayer...yeah right, whatever, we have paid our NI contributions like everyone else, so why shouldnt i claim, everyone else seems to.

Goverment seem to give handouts to single parent families, but when you are a couple you get nothing!
#19
where u from?
#20
I was lucky enough to have grandparents look after mine when I went back to work in March but the youngest will be starting school in September so life will be a lot simpler. However, I'm pretty sure that if your wife did decide to go back to work that you can claim childcare vouchers, you'll have to look into them on the internet (or on MSE) as I don't know exactly how they work but I do know from working in a school Finance Office that you claim them through your employer which makes childcare cheaper.

Perhaps this is an option if you can't afford for your wife to give up work, when I gave up for 4yrs we couldn't claim any more benefits at all (I think the limit is around £20K income) so it was a struggle and we are still paying for it now, but I don't regret it for one moment. Maybe a compromise is for your wife to do 2 days a week at work, claim childcare vouchers to offset the other days, or try to get a relative to look after your LO on these days.

It is hard, I don't know how people manage to go back to work when they've got children, both financially and emotionally and this is definitely the time to spend at home with your children if you can manage it.

Good luck!
#21
We're in the same boat. Working parents and currently put the little one in holiday playscheme at £16 a day. Not a bad price compared to what we'd be shelling out for a child minder for the day. However, the welfare system is designed to encourage scroungers. Our neighbours, both in their 20s, have 4 children and the parents don't work. They get housing benefit and lots of other benefits. It's not in their interests to work. While we hurry around in the morning and evenings to work around our work schedules, they just laze it around. Their weekly recycling bin has well over 50 beer cans. Constant smoking is a feature as well. Not sure how they can afford all this. To top it off, they get free school meals, and many other freebies. The house they were given was recently renovated to a very good standard. Free it is!

I rang the helpline the other day to ask if we could get some help towards the playscheme costs, as we both are working parents. Was told that as the household income is over £25k, no help can be expected. Makes me sick everyday to watch these scroungers in the neighbourhood laze around and do diddly squat while decent taxpayers have to fund their laziness.

Sorry, rant over and sorry for hijacking the thread!
banned#22
aircanman;5955242
thanks for all the helpful posts, im basically confused looking for options, I dont want to scrounge or anything, ive paid my taxes long enough thank you very much (to the comments about scrounging)

At the end of the day, we are all taking taxpayers money by using NHS, the footpaths, driving cars etc, so having a benefit is just a way of getting a little back from paying in so many years!


bazzaric;5955265
I think the point others are trying to make is that you shouldn't be considering quitting your job to get benefits, child or not. Taxes are meant to be there for those who are out of work through no fault of their own, i.e. Redundancy but are still actively seeking work.

Thanks Bazza, that was my point. Anyway, the best tip is as I have already mentioned which seems to have been missed. :thinking:

enter different scenarios here to get a FULL list of what you can claim for:-

http://www.entitledto.co.uk/
#23
Its a real shame this country doesn't seem to reward couples who play by the rules.

Me and the missus bought our own home after renting for a couple of years, then got married (rather than putting our names down on the council-house list aged 16, and then having a baby straight away to guarantee a bump up the order)

We both work full-time and earn decent money, yet realistically we'd need to move house in order to have kids; If we were unemployed and living off the state, her getting pregnant would be enough to ensure our move to a house with an extra bedroom.

Combined we earn "too much" to helped by the state (from the pot of our own money that we've been paying for the last 10 years)

It seems to be the case that if you're intelligent and employed you're forced to struggle through life, yet if you choose not to work everything is provided (apart from any morals, decency etc)
#24
And to all those suggesting the OP is looking for a way to get some money from "the taxpayer", why not?

Surely one of the reasons we put up with our country's inflated tax contributions is that we expect something back from it eventually?

Otherwise we're paying a third of our wages for the NHS and what else??
#25
Child care options...

nursey 8am to 6pm, little flexibility around £175 a week
childminder, increased flexibility, up to one on one care, around £150 p/wk rates may be negotiable.

once the baby is of 3/4 yrs of age, you're eligible for 3 hrs free nursery schooling per day.
older then that, after school clubs may cost around £50 a week, "wrap around care" ie for breakfast before school and after school provision ( usually up to 6pm ).

Benefits to help cover child care arrangements.. working families tax credits, child tax credit may pay up to 80% of child care costs, depending on how much you and your wife earn.

If you're steadfast in your wife remaining at home to care for your child then consider home-based work options/ part time work/ sharing child care between each other.

I work from home mainly ( self employed, own business ) and have four children at home... it isnt impossible to do.

Good luck with whatever you decide x x x
#26
teambintip
And to all those suggesting the OP is looking for a way to get some money from "the taxpayer", why not?

Surely one of the reasons we put up with our country's inflated tax contributions is that we expect something back from it eventually?

Otherwise we're paying a third of our wages for the NHS and what else??


I would be in a same situation to you were I to have children at the moment. I've maxed out on a house so that i'm investing the most of my money, but if we were to have kids we would have to downgrade a wee bit. But, that's how 'we' live in Britain, work to get things and support our children when we have them. Tax contributions are not a savings account you can use when you decide to have children. Yes, they seem over inflated but thats partly because of the amount of people using them when they really should be out working.

What I expect back from my Taxes is a safety net should I lose my job through no doing of my own until I found other employment.
banned#27
teambintip
And to all those suggesting the OP is looking for a way to get some money from "the taxpayer", why not?

Surely one of the reasons we put up with our country's inflated tax contributions is that we expect something back from it eventually?

Otherwise we're paying a third of our wages for the NHS and what else??


Actually, I pay for the NHS but have private healthcare and don't qualify for free prescriptions....

so I'm not entirely sure what I'm paying (a boatload of) taxes for.
[mod]#28
FilthAndFurry;5956238
Actually, I pay for the NHS but have private healthcare and don't qualify for free prescriptions....

so I'm not entirely sure what I'm paying (a boatload of) taxes for.


If it was emergency then you would be treated by the NHS.
banned#29
Syzable
If it was emergency then you would be treated by the NHS.


You're right and I think the NHS and welfare state is something we should be proud of.

Just seems like it's no longer what it was originally intended to be.
[mod]#30
FilthAndFurry;5956321
You're right and I think the NHS and welfare state is something we should be proud of.

Just seems like it's no longer what it was originally intended to be.


I agree with you........unfortunately with all things like this there are always a number that exploit and abuse these things. (not having a pop at OP)

Sadly, consecutive governments always promise and never deliver when it comes to tougher regulations and clampdowns.
#31
Unfortunately it isn't possible to pick and choose which taxes we pay and which we dont.

We pay NHS charges even if we don't use medical services and education, even if we have no children...

All part of living within the societal constraints of the country we accept citizenship of.
[mod]#32
ClarityofMind;5956378
Unfortunately it isn't possible to pick and choose which taxes we pay and which we dont.

We pay NHS charges even if we don't use medical services and education, even if we have no children...

All part of living within the societal constraints of the country we accept citizenship of.


Everyone uses the medical services at some point and hopefully we've all been to school. lol (then again.........reading some threads.......maybe not. :lol: )
#33
Syzable
Everyone uses the medical services at some point and hopefully we've all been to school. lol (then again.........reading some threads.......maybe not. :lol: )


and if we immigrate into the UK .. we still pay for those taxes... it isnt about what we use, what we have use(d) or do not use... it's about rules and norms and societal sanctions.
#34
ClarityofMind
and if we immigrate into the UK .. we still pay for those taxes... it isnt about what we use, what we have use(d) or do not use... it's about rules and norms and societal sanctions.


hence the term National Insurance, you don't plan to be run over, have the odd heart attack, or require your broken arm be attended to etc, but its there when you need to use it.

The NHS is what it should be however people live longer these days making the population larger still, however offensive this sounds, the biggest cost to the NHS is old people.
#35
Alfonse
hence the term National Insurance, you don't plan to be run over, have the odd heart attack, or require your broken arm be attended to etc, but its there when you need to use it.

The NHS is what it should be however people live longer these days making the population larger still, however offensive this sounds, the biggest cost to the NHS is old people.


paid my NHS contributions today.. 3 months cost? £31.20.
[mod]#36
ClarityofMind;5956881
paid my NHS contributions today.. 3 months cost? £31.20.


Very good value for money. :)
#37
ClarityofMind
paid my NHS contributions today.. 3 months cost? £31.20.


strange reply.

anywho is that it?
#38
donnydude
Welcome to the real world.
You have kids you have to pay for them!
Unbelievable!


+ 1001
#39
Syzable
Very good value for money. :)


Sure is! :) x x
#40
Alfonse
strange reply.

anywho is that it?


yes, thats the amount i pay for three months ( self employed so I pay my own )

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