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Son want to leave home and rent.

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However, he is at college and gets EMI. Which is 30 quid week. What would he live on? Do income support top it up or somat.? Read More
cherishu2 Avatar
8y, 2m agoPosted 8 years, 2 months ago
However, he is at college and gets EMI. Which is 30 quid week.
What would he live on?
Do income support top it up or somat.?
cherishu2 Avatar
8y, 2m agoPosted 8 years, 2 months ago
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#1
Hostel.
#2
he has to go to the council and get his name put down on the housing aiting list - but he will be on it forever - single young men are not classified as any sort of emergency for housing needs - if he wants to rent his best bet is to go to the housing section and find out exactly what they are willing to pay for him - any short comings on the property he decides to rent will be down to him to pay for so that is why he needs to find out the maximum amount of benefit he is entitled to
#3
And remember, you only get EMA for termtime. He'll be without EMA for 6 weeks soon.
#4
If he's only on EMA he better get a job asap. Its coming up summer.

Macdonalds or something as I'm assuming he's too young for bar work.
#5
Do income support top it up or somat.?



when he finishes college at 3:30 or earlier most days i imagine, he might have to get a j-o-b to pay some rent :thumbsup:
#6
how old is he ? why does he want to leave surley as a student he is better off at home till he has finished his course and got some propper earned money behind him, you dont want him to be living off benifits in a flat at this age do you ??
#7
dont think he will get far on his own at this stage in life tbh tell him to save his money for when he can afford to move out
#8
I left home as soon as i finished school but that meant I could get a job etc I returned to study 5 years later once I'd grown up a bit. different strokes for different folks. It's just hard at first. not all fun n parties. Make sure he realises it can be stressfull.
#9
He is 18 sorry forgot that bit.
He is training to be a motor sport mechanic.
He is working voluntarily at the mo for a racing team. sort of a foot in the door thing.
I certainly know that now is wrong time for him to leave home. But these kids dont live in the real world do they.?
so i want as much ammo to show him its not a good idea ya see
Hostel is out of the question. my eldest went into one and it aint happening twice.
Though they are wonderful places when your in need. He has a home and would be taking it from someone who needs it.
Thasnk you all xxxx

I left home at 17yrs and rented a property. But im pretty sure i was more mature than him.
#10
cherishu2
He is 18 sorry forgot that bit.
He is training to be a motor sport mechanic.
He is working voluntarily at the mo for a racing team. sort of a foot in the door thing.
I certainly know that now is wrong time for him to leave home. But these kids dont live in the real world do they.?
so i want as much ammo to show him its not a good idea ya see
Hostel is out of the question. my eldest went into one and it aint happening twice.
Though they are wonderful places when your in need. He has a home and would be taking it from someone who needs it.
Thasnk you all xxxx

I left home at 17yrs and rented a property. But im pretty sure i was more mature than him.



I left at 17 too, i think we all think were mature at that age? Sounds like your a worried mum. Mine was too as I'm sure was yours.

Life eh?
banned#11
Give him the facts then let him make is own mistakes, by pestering him about it your just pushing him to jump
#12
At 16, it is possible that he could live in some sort of supported housing project, which he would have his own flat, but they are set up to target certain groups.

It sounds like he wants to move out because he wants to play "house", so I think he has no hope of getting anywhere.
#13
lumoruk
Give him the facts then let him make is own mistakes, by pestering him about it your just pushing him to jump



I agree, you've got to learn from your own mistakes. no matter what your told at that age your sure you know better.

you cant keep him wrapped in cotton wool.
#14
thesaint
At 16, it is possible that he could live in some sort of supported housing project, which he would have his own flat, but they are set up to target certain groups.

It sounds like he wants to move out because he wants to play "house", so I think he has no hope of getting anywhere.



Dont know about playing house. Ijust wanted somewhere to chill drink n party with my mates. You cant do that comfortably in your folks house. and at the time it feels worth it even though all you can afford to eat is beans because any other spare cash is spent on being young.
#15
cherishu2

so i want as much ammo to show him its not a good idea ya see
.



Rent at least £100 per week
Gas and leccy - £20
Council tax £30
Water £8
Food £30

Theres nearly £200 quid a week he needs to be bringing in, thats before any luxuries like mobile phone..tv licence...nights out with mates :thumbsup:
#16
kungfu
Rent at least £100 per week
Gas and leccy - £20
Council tax £30
Water £8
Food £30

Theres nearly £200 quid a week he needs to be bringing in, thats before any luxuries like mobile phone..tv licence...nights out with mates :thumbsup:



Thats if he gets his own place.

its best to share at first. 2-3 bed flat with mates. will half those costs at least.
#17
let him make the mistake, he will soon realise that he's best off where he is for now. He will have to give up his voluntary job and get a real one, probably a crap one too.
#18
my son was full of this when he was 18 couldnt wait to rent his own place, we let him try to get his own place when realised he couldnt afford it then come up with the idea of flat sharing with friends again we told him to sit down and to write out the expenses that he needed he soon found out that he needed more money just to eat he was at college on ema plus he had a partime job of course he stayed he is twenty now and still at home and his brother that is 18 in june is starting to say same thing cant wait to leave home i think its a stage they all go through bless their little cotton socks
#19
Just start charging him rent to stay with you, and see how he copes. £100 a week including bills. See how he copes with £400 a month less in his pocket....

He doesn't realise how lucky he has it. Why should he get benefits when there's a perfectly good roof over his head?
#20
bazzaric
Just start charging him rent to stay with you, and see how he copes. £100 a week including bills. See how he copes with £400 a month less in his pocket....

He doesn't realise how lucky he has it. Why should he get benefits when there's a perfectly good roof over his head?


Problem is in a yound lads head, he may just think this is an extra reason to leave home. If he he really set on leaving let him do so but knowing that he has your support if its needed. He is probably extremely proud and convinced that he knows best. He may have hidden depths. Only way everyone will know for sure is allowing him to test himself.

I am fully aware that in practice it may be very much more complicated than this.
#21
Thank you all ill give him the facts.
I always let them make their mistakes. But i have told him im not paying the 500 quid depsit on a flat.
#22
cherishu2
Thank you all ill give him the facts.
I always let them make their mistakes. But i have told him im not paying the 500 quid depsit on a flat.


Is it your son that commented earlier in the thread :?
#23
Honey make sure he realises what he's taking on before he leaves...

Rent
Council tax
Water
Gas
Electric
Cable/mobile phone/tv/landline

Plus food...

and if he imagines he's gonna be able to afford to go out and have fun after paying for all that he better have a good job eh?

We all left home younger than our kids are able to. Education must and should last at least up to 18. He doesn't want to compromise his education by working all hours does he?

I left home in my mid teens and was made a ward of court... fun times....NOT. But at least I had the man who was to become my hubby to depend on.

Make sure he knows what he's really doing before he makes the decision to walk out the door.... and always have the door open for him if he decides to return x x x
#24
kungfu
Rent at least £100 per week
Gas and leccy - £20
Council tax £30
Water £8
Food £30

Theres nearly £200 quid a week he needs to be bringing in, thats before any luxuries like mobile phone..tv licence...nights out with mates :thumbsup:


just saw this... good post x

this is exactly the kind of info I'd be presenting him with.

When my son was 17 he considered leaving home too. At nearly 21 he's still here and happy now. Once they get through this stage it'll be fine. Perhaps you could make a deal with him that you'll loosen the apron strings somewhat if he will make good grades in his studies... x x x
#25
The thing is while he is still at home, if he feels he is getting a hard time he can blame everyone else. Sometimes it is necessary to draw back so he can see the wider picture. Not everybody learns in the same way and what one person can learn from speaking to another, a different person may just not take onboard.
I am seeing this quite a lot with a young lad at the moment. Not my son. Sometimes they must be allowed to drop enough to realise that what advice you are giving makes sense.
Does not mean they will thank you though.
#26
WoolyM
The thing is while he is still at home, if he feels he is getting a hard time he can blame everyone else. Sometimes it is necessary to draw back so he can see the wider picture. Not everybody learns in the same way and what one person can learn from speaking to another, a different person may just not take onboard.
I am seeing this quite a lot with a young lad at the moment. Not my son. Sometimes they must be allowed to drop enough to realise that what advice you are giving makes sense.
Does not mean they will thank you though.


this has been my point exactly. we've all been young and look at us now.

we sit on forums looking for someone to discuss things with. We never had forums growing up. the worst that can happen is he will come home, cap in hand.

let him grow!

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