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sons got autism

kevlowater Avatar
8y, 2m agoPosted 8 years, 2 months ago
we have just been told our 6 year old son has autism not sure how to feel about this its good we know why he behaves why he does and that he,s not just naughty but worried how we going to deal with this and how it will affect him when he gets older anyone else in the same position would love some advice
kevlowater Avatar
8y, 2m agoPosted 8 years, 2 months ago
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#1
best to read up on it as theres huge differences between a child thats mildly autistic to one thats severely. A lot is dependent at what end of the autistic spectrum he is . Also bewarned they might find other conditions linked ot it as well. Im not that clued up but my mum teaches special needs and so picked up on what she says from a teaching point of view.
Also so much will depend on you and his teachers and how you handle him with regards his development in life.
#2
DIVA1977
best to read up on it as theres huge differences between a child thats mildly autistic to one thats severely. A lot is dependent at what end of the autistic spectrum he is . Also bewarned they might find other conditions linked ot it as well. Im not that clued up but my mum teaches special needs and so picked up on what she says from a teaching point of view.
Also so much will depend on you and his teachers and how you handle him with regards his development in life.


very good advice:thumbsup: my friends son has ADHD and a touch of autism and i know he has to be handled different to others as his mind (or brain) doesn't work like those of other children

i know you get a lot of support from health visitors etc and they will give you some paperwork to read up on which seems to make things much clearer.

i can imagine how you're feeling coz i had my son tested for ADHD but turns out hes just naughty!!! lol
good luck with everything.
#3
Autism is not a defined point and your son will be somewhere on the autistic spectrum so there is a very wide variation in what that means for you all.

Take heart though. Many successful people are on the autistic spectrum.

Many people have found this helpful

The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time

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The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/0/03/Curiousincidentofdoginnighttime.jpg/100px-Curiousincidentofdoginnighttime.jpgAuthorMark HaddonCountryUnited KingdomLanguageEnglishGenre(s)Mystery novelPublisherJonathan CapePublication date2003Media typePrint (Hardback & Paperback)Pages226ISBNISBN 0-09-945025-9The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time is a 2003 novel by British writer Mark Haddon. It won the 2003 Whitbread Book of the Year[1] and the 2004 Commonwealth Writers' Prize for Best First Book.[2] Its title is a quotation of a remark made by the fictional detective Sherlock Holmes in Arthur Conan Doyle's 1894 short story "Silver Blaze".
The story is written in the first-person perspective of Christopher John Francis Boone, a 15-year-old autistic boy living in Swindon, Wiltshire. Although Christopher's condition within the autism spectrum is not stated explicitly within the novel, the summary on the book's inside cover describes it as Asperger syndrome.
[helper]#4
There is some information on the National Autistic Society website.
http://www.nas.org.uk/

Has an information section for Parents and carers
#5
I am surprised that they didn't give you any information on this and groups that can be contacted. I am a nursery nurse and i have worked with children with autism. My friend has a little boy with autism, he is five. She goes on regular courses to keep up to date and to help understand how there brain reacts to certain things, they were organized through The NAS EarlyBird Programme.
You will also be entitled to certain benefits which will help you purchase anything that could help your son. There is a lot of information to take in. When you get a spare minute have a look here
#6
We have quite a few kids with varying forms of autism at my school. Rest assured, this is not as bad as it might seem. Now that he has been diagnosed, make sure he gets a statement of educational needs from the education department, as this means he will get extra resources. Maybe join a parents group and read up on this.
banned#7
The fact its been diagnosed is probably a good sign in that its probably moderate, though its still frustrating that authorities let these things slip through.

I would strongly suggest you speak to his school to get advise on taking it foward to get a statement of education needs (SEN). Most authorities are becoming more difficult to obtain one. (Simply put it will contain legal requirements and costs that the LEA will need to comply to. For some reason they told like tieing themselves up with something they are accountable.)

I'm currently at work at the mo, but will respond with what will hopefully be useful info a bit later.
#8
thanks everyone i,ll try some of those links ur all so helpful xxxxx
#9
I have 2 sons with autism, my 5 year old got diagnosed when he was 3 (last year in january) and i was absolutely devestated as i thought he just needed help with his speach & language. My 7 year old got diagnosed about 3 weeks ago after we could see similarities between them. If you ever want to pm me feel free. What area do you live in as i found support groups really good for coming to terms with it & have made friends with other parents who understand :)
#10
froglet;3090511
We have quite a few kids with varying forms of autism at my school. Rest assured, this is not as bad as it might seem. Now that he has been diagnosed, make sure he gets a statement of educational needs from the education department, as this means he will get extra resources. Maybe join a parents group and read up on this.

he might not need a statement depending on what level of the spectum he is...
my 5 year old has a statement & attends a specialist school but my 7 year old can cope well with mainstream without a statement...
#11
kevlowater;3090626
thanks everyone i,ll try some of those links ur all so helpful xxxxx

have a hug :friends:
banned#12
once you have been told this it is almost like a world lifted off your shoulders, at least now you can move on and deal with the situation, children in the autistic spectrum have different ideas to other children and as a parent you can feel like your baging your head against a brick wall, hopefully now you can learn to deal with things differently, for you and your family
#13
we not sure at what level he is at yet but i think its mild. He already gets help at school from the senco co-ordonater and has a speech therapist so i think he will stay in main stream schoool we live in north notts but will ask health visitor about groups thanks
#14
thanks need that got to work this afternoon and could do without it
#15
You'll be surprised how many children (and adults) do have autism, albeit on different scales.
#16
My nephew has been diagnosed with autism since he was 5 i think it was when it was originally classed as severe or whatever they say, since then he has only progressed, he is 10 now and can kinda understand peoples emotions... i say kinds cus sometimes you can see it doesnt click with him. regardless of him having autism it doesnt take away from the fact that he has got a great peronsality and is lovely to be around, My sister is a single mother with him and i have always been very close. when first diagnosed he would not allow anyone to cuddle or touch him without outbursts of violence apart from me.. it has got a lot better though through the years and now you wouldnt notice any difference between him and another 10 year old boy even when it comes to small things he can be very personal and affectionate.
#17
kevlowater;3090714
we not sure at what level he is at yet but i think its mild. He already gets help at school from the senco co-ordonater and has a speech therapist so i think he will stay in main stream schoool we live in north notts but will ask health visitor about groups thanks

speak to his speech & language therapist as when my son got diagnosed i put my name down through s&l to do an earlybird course which really helped me to understand things from my son's point of view :thumbsup: if you also contact the paedeatrician who diagnosed your son they will be able to give you information of groups, help you are entitled to, etc :)
banned#18
OK, back now with a little more time!

From the posts already made and your replies, you appear to have taken on board what's been said and coping with the bombshell news. I know when we first learnt, my missus went to pieces. I was a bit more pragmatic about it and engrossed myself in as much info as I could to seek the help I thought would be needed.

What I did learn, was that getting authorities to act is often much harder than it should be. Obviously, as some have said, they didn't struggle, but my own LEA (Bromley) weren't and still aren't the easist of authorities to deal with. As many on here will know, I ain't one for backing off. I used to call and pester them quite regularly to ask what the latest was. (He was forever having "assessments" - and no real results or suggestions for a strategy ever forthcoming.) We were very lucky. Jack managed to get a place in one of the best pre-schools for autistic kids in the country. (The Pheonix) He did get a very good start and was statemented. Just 3 years after, we were told his disabilities wouldn't have got him a placement as there are far more severe cases. That suggests more provision is needed... but that's another story.

It was recommended that he was given extra speech and language support and that was on his statement. It's still there. I'm wondering when that's going to start! Whilst I am only speaking of personal experience here, I've seen the same problem mentioned over and over again throughout the country.

The moral and purpose of telling you this, is the fact you need to get heard and not be fobbed off. Thats the best bit of advise I can give!

OK, now onto other areas. So he has been diagnosed ASD. What are the noticable things to you? If its like Jack, it will be short attention Span (unless the task is of interest), sometimes obsessive behaviour (does he paly with Thomas the Tank engine toys and line them up in the "correct order" etc?), temper tantrums? Lack of eye contact? Fussy eater? I suppose most will probably think that sounds like a "normal" child (I that using that word!) and to be fair it probably is! But its leaving this type of behaviour that sets an autistic child apart (IMHO.) Its probably an idea to be a bit descriptive here and I think you will get a bit of advise that suits your own specifics from the experience that other members have had.

Having been helped by our local autistic charity, I've given something back and am webmaster for there site. Have a look at [url]www.bromleyautistictrust.co.uk[/url] which may help with some ideas and info. I would certainly advise that you make use of a computer to help him with his schooling. That extra help will be invaluable. Again, I'm webmaster for his school and there are some useful things I'd suggest may help. The stuff on this page is the type of thing I am referring.

Anyway, if you can fill some of the blanks, there will be an army of people here to offer their support. It might seem like the end of the world to hear this bombshell, but it really is just one of those facts of life you just learn to cope with.
#19
I have a son 12 who was diagnosed at nearly 8 after 7 years of trying to get him diagnosed, also my youngest daughter is going through the process at the moment for diagnosis. Both are at the lower end of the Spectrum, Aspergers syndrome. My son is in mainstream school, with virtually no help (just a little with english) and he is brill at maths. He started with speech therapy but that didnt last long, My daughter has started nursey school this term and is just starting to be assessed by the speech therapists. Both have poor social skills, faddy eaters, routine based but happy kids.

The book that has been mentioned above is brilliant. To me it was very relevant as the boy in the book shares the same name as my son.

The NAS as brill for help. They night be able to tell you of any independant groups in your area. We have one in Stoke on Trent and we went along to some of the events, but as my son is at the lower end, he got concerned his condition was going to get worse, so we stopped going, but the information that we got from them has been a great help.

All i can say is just keep pushing for help.
banned#20
281273
All i can say is just keep pushing for help.


And that really is advise you will keep hearing! (And with good reason!)
#21
I've got a 3 year old that's been diagnosed with ASD and the best advice I can give you is don't let the so called health professionals fob you off and leave you with no support.

Jack has had a certain problem since birth that is a major issue, but his consultant paediatrician has been absolutely useless and basically labelled me as a neurotic mother. After almost a year of pushing and pushing at this issue because I was continually being told 'there's nothing we can do' or just being ignored, I finally got an appointment with the more child friendly gp in our surgery who immediately agreed that there is a problem that needs addressing and it could be down to something as serious as nerve or spinal damage. She's going to do all she can to find out what's causing this issue, but I can't believe that if I hadn't been so persistant and not stopped harassing people, something as serious as this would have been swept under the carpet because the so called experts either couldn't be bothered to look into his problem or just assumed I was being over the top and were ignoring me.

You know your son better than anyone, so don't let people tell you that your instincts are wrong and let them fob you off if you are really worried about something. There is a lot of support out there, but sometimes you have to ask for it, so make sure you do. :thumbsup:
#22
kevlowater
we not sure at what level he is at yet but i think its mild. He already gets help at school from the senco co-ordonater and has a speech therapist so i think he will stay in main stream schoool we live in north notts but will ask health visitor about groups thanks

I probably live close to you and work with kids with SEN at a school in sheffield (but I live in N Notts)
I see a few autistic children as part of my job (I am in charge of a unit for vulnerable pupils attached to a mainstream school). Not sure if I can help at all but feel free to send me a pm if you think I might be able to.
#23
HI Ihave never posted on here before, so dont know id correct , but I am replying to Susannah ,
Both my daughters have autistic boys, both are aged 4 , one is non verbal, one is very verbal!!! lol
I will if ok with you get my daughters to message you, but Will they have to register with hot uk ?
The boys are now at mainstream school, to see how they get on,
James uses pecs, Brandon uses everything !!
We liv e in Norfolk , and the help and understanding they have both is is brilliant in every way
They are very lucky???
But anyway I will tell daughters today and hope they can get intouch and speak with you.

Carol

B

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