Special anniversary - so dissapointed => Why are men so NOT romantic ??? - HotUKDeals
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Special anniversary - so dissapointed => Why are men so NOT romantic ???

mango224 Avatar
6y, 11m agoPosted 6 years, 11 months ago
Can someone please tell me I have a 10th anniversary coming up in 2 day and I know my other half isnt the romantic type / but being thoughtful doesnt need to cost any money just some effort would be nice.

He has never got me anything for my anniversary so I am unsure why I am now upset I guess I thought that 10 years counted for something. He has told me he didnt got me anything because I didnt NEED anything (well, yes I do need oven gloves, kitchen towels etc ) but not something I would want for my anniversary to be honest.

He told me yesterday to book a table somewhere nice as he didnt plan anything He knows I planned months ago a babysitting weekend for our 3 little boys so that we could have a special just the 2 of us (very rare) weekend. I have been given hints for weeks and bought him something special.

All the nice restaurants I called are fully booked but that is not the point I feel disappointed he didnt arrange something I guess. Part of me says it is my own fault for expecting something when nothing happened all those year before .. ahhh sorry to moan at you guys I am just a tiered mum in need of some attention ;(
mango224 Avatar
6y, 11m agoPosted 6 years, 11 months ago
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#1
Darling... dont give a man HINTS

Give him orders and instructions and the warning that if it isn't done he is in SERIOUS dog cakky :)

Otherwise he wont think its important....... after all... you've got everything you need.........

............havent you???
#2
you need to give him something - a divorce!
#3
my fellas the same in fact i gave up years ago i either live with it or without it
but in his defence he is a good dad,very helpful around the house etc he is just not good at buying presents or romantic at all x
suspended#4
I would say any anniversary, especially a decade, would involve gifts. Even if he worked all day every day i'm sure he could buy you at least a bunch of flowers
banned#5
its not solely YOUR anniversary

And if you dont ask (specifically) you wont get - thats life
#6
A simple gesture doesnt show how much you love someone it just feeds into other peoples pockets.

If love is truely love you dont need to prove it with uncessary gestures.
#7
dimebars
its not solely YOUR anniversary

And if you dont ask (specifically) you wont get - thats life


^^^^ see????
#8
Pfft, I'm the opposite. I would class myself as very romantic and could be very creative,

My gf however isn't really into that and is more material - The thought doesn't count as much as the awesomeness of the gift really. A pet peeve of mine I guess, but I still love her to pieces and just get on with it.

My romanticness can only go so far, then after that it would be wasted :(

Also, men need to be told if you want something, very simple really. Some of us are good guessers or simply know you lot well enough, but the majority (in fact we all are) simple at times and being told is often the best policy.
#9
I agree with Clarity. Give detailed instructions if you don't want to be disappointed. I knew the score when we got married, so it's our tradition (for anniversarys) that we both take the day off work, go shopping together, for a joint present that fits with the traditional gift of that year. Paper/lace/cotton/leather/wood etc. I've now got nice memories and gifts that last forever. And they don't have to be expensive. One year we were broke, so we chose a nice cotton apron, covered in hearts. We'll have it forever, and it's something we can both share. Another year, we were a bit richer, so we got a smashing wood patio set. Instruct, or do it yourself... Happy Anniversary!:-D
#10
agree with CoM...dont bother with hints....we all want that romantic bloke but we love our partners for a reason and u gotta tk the good for the unromantic! (i can say all this as its been half a year since my annoversary and only now can i forgive him for another crappy anniversary!)

got my 10th in 2 and half yrs and im not leaving it to him. hes uselss and ill end up upset if i hope he does something to make me feel super special (hes managed it twice out of 7anniversaries...so hes ok!). so TELL HIM u still got 2 days to organise something. if ur nr london why not do a day trip there.... check out hyde parm meant to be lovely
#11
DragonChris
Pfft, I'm the opposite. I would class myself as very romantic and could be very creative,

My gf however isn't really into that and is more material - The thought doesn't count as much as the awesomeness of the gift really. A pet peeve of mine I guess, but I still love her to pieces and just get on with it.

My romanticness can only go so far, then after that it would be wasted :(

Also, men need to be told if you want something, very simple really. Some of us are good guessers or simply know you lot well enough, but the majority (in fact we all are) simple at times and being told is often the best policy.


Dump her man, she is cheating on you
#12
send a bouquet of flowers to his work

that way you get the flowers and he gets a sticking off his mates:-D
#13
jellybaby22
dont see the point in anniversaries.....or valentines day...or any of that stuff.....
wouldnt bother me if my OH didnt do anything...its everyday that counts not one or two days a year


hubbys a lucky bloke!
#14
i find its little things that mean alot to me
i have often told my bf that the most romantic thing he bought me was a pregnancy magazine and a bottle of gaviscon WITHOUT asking for them
to me it felt like he had taken the time to stop of on the way home from work and think about me and probably think i will get her a bottle of gaviscon to keep her quiet for the night lol
banned#15
dimebars
its not solely YOUR anniversary

And if you dont ask (specifically) you wont get - thats life


ClarityofMind
^^^^ see????


something wrong with what i said?

PS - what did you intend doing for him OP?
#16
holly100
send a bouquet of flowers to his work

that way you get the flowers and he gets a sticking off his mates:-D


I like this idea!
#17
dimebars
something wrong with what i said?



not at all your post just confirmed what I'd already written. :thumbsup:
banned#18
dimebars

PS - what did you intend doing for him OP?


Let me guess - nowt

take take take take take....................
#19
It looks like you have excepted his non grand gestures for awhile and so therefore he hasnt needed to top it! I mean was he romantic when you dated? If not, well youve put up with it long enough! Ok so it is both your anniversary, but for him to tell you to book it, is that standard procedure? tell him he should book it as a surprise!
And may I suggest that for new year resolution you both declare that you will make a bit more of an effort for each other on special occasions! Im sure he will get the hint, but hint more strongly all the year, until he is well trained and can recite back to you, 'yes I know, make more effort on our anniversary! sigh!'
#20
Lol this thread just shows what women seem to think about men, that men have to be the romantic one and they are some dim people who need taken by the hand and shown what to get.

As arleady been said things like anniversaries are 2 way things, someone cant complain about their husband being unromantic then buy him nothing or something like a DIY kit then expect to be wined and dined and treated like a princess.
#21
jellybaby22
loooooool

he would disagree:-D honestly dont care about birthdays..anniversaries...and esp. hate valentines day.....

we say i love you every day...he makes me cups of tea...what more could I ask for:-D


Do you have a sister (Obviously as long as she has the same mentality as you):p
banned#22
bernyrabbit
It looks like you have excepted his non grand gestures for awhile and so therefore he hasnt needed to top it! I mean was he romantic when you dated? If not, well youve put up with it long enough! Ok so it is both your anniversary, but for him to tell you to book it, is that standard procedure? tell him he should book it as a surprise!
And may I suggest that for new year resolution you both declare that you will make a bit more of an effort for each other on special occasions! Im sure he will get the hint, but hint more strongly all the year, until he is well trained and can recite back to you, 'yes I know, make more effort on our anniversary! sigh!'


Why should he book it? No doubt the OP expects him to pay for it too?

the anniversary is a celebration for BOTH of them - why should he be ripped for bog roll whilst she moans and does nothing?
#23
dimebars
something wrong with what i said?

PS - what did you intend doing for him OP?


BJ
banned#24
hassony
BJ


Thats a given..............
#25
jellybaby22
I do


but she doesnt.... money grabbing ( I shall not say....)
Cant stand women who expect chocs and flowers and whinge when they dont get them....

as long as he leaves his clothes in a pile on the floor ..so i dont have to look for them...and plays xbox at night to give me peace to tidy and watch eastenders Im a happy lass:p


You sound more like a lad then many lads these days that are a bit girly lol
#26
hassony
Dump her man, she is cheating on you


Nah, just not a tradionally romantic girl. >.<
#27
jellybaby22
I do


but she doesnt.... money grabbing ( I shall not say....)
Cant stand women who expect chocs and flowers and whinge when they dont get them....

as long as he leaves his clothes in a pile on the floor ..so i dont have to look for them...and plays xbox at night to give me peace to tidy and watch eastenders Im a happy lass:p


Gods sake woman you're making it harder for the rest of us to train our men to pick their own clothes up :lol:
banned#28
jellybaby22
you know men who like washing tidying and watching eastender.....

are they pre or post op:-D


its called "the afterlife"
#29
jellybaby22
:shock:

My poor OH has been at work all day..... least I can do is pick his clothes up for him:p


Bless you, give it 9 more weeks and it'll be "You're never touchin me again mutha f..........." :-D;-)
#30
OK well yes an anniversary should be both ways & yes it is the little things that matter in every day - I can understand all that
I guess i am just tiered of him not making an effort / I always give him a card with a poem i wrote myself ... last anniversary he actually gave me back one of my own cards - crossed out my name and wrote his own - gave it to me and said i know how much you are into recycling ... he thought it was funny / I didn`t ...
Still maybe I should just remember that he must have done something right to make it this far with me ;) Thank you for the advice ;)
#31
I think the best thing to do is not to talk to him about it, infact posting on a forum would be your best bet, it will help you in leaps and bounds.
banned#32
Rather pathetic that some women seem to think men are so useless that they can't manage to arrange a romantic evening/weekend or manage even a gesture.

You need to keep the romance alive or you're just two people living in the same house.

If you're happy with a boring life then don't moan.

If not, do something about it either with your current partner or someone else:?
#33
Sorry OP but are you trapped in a time warp? Its nearly 2010, women have wanted equality for years and now they have damned well got it, like it or not! As long as he is a good hubby and you know he loves you why does he have to prove that by spending money. I could say my OH is the same, but I dont.....as Ryouga said
A simple gesture doesnt show how much you love someone it just feeds into other peoples pockets.

If love is truely love you dont need to prove it with uncessary gestures.
#34
Well Mango, you do sound tired and fed up, but it looks like it's up to you, if you want romantic. A leopard can't change its spots and there's no magic wand to wave to romantic-up your O/H.

If you can't book anywhere nice, am I right in thinking that your little troop are off somewhere for the w/e? If so, plan a great time in - take-away, bubbly, rom-com and nice fresh bed-linen!! Don't be sad. It sounds like you have a good partnership.

10 years - congrats to you.

TBH - I agree with JB.
jellybaby22
dont see the point in anniversaries.....or valentines day...or any of that stuff.....
wouldnt bother me if my OH didnt do anything...its everyday that counts not one or two days a year

It's the cup of tea mine brings for me in bed, every morning, that does it for me.:-D

edit - as Bitsey says, I agree with her, as well.
#35
Oh btw whos multi are you? 1st post since 2004?
#36
mango224
OK well yes an anniversary should be both ways & yes it is the little things that matter in every day - I can understand all that
I guess i am just tiered of him not making an effort / I always give him a card with a poem i wrote myself ... last anniversary he actually gave me back one of my own cards - crossed out my name and wrote his own - gave it to me and said i know how much you are into recycling ... he thought it was funny / I didn`t ...
Still maybe I should just remember that he must have done something right to make it this far with me ;) Thank you for the advice ;)

I think that's quite funny, as well. :oops:

We have had the same wedding anniversary card for the last 12 years, I think, now - it's a nice one from the US and we get it out every year and both sign it! It seemed a shame to keep buying new ones.
#37
jellybaby22
o he knows in 9 weeks he will have to kick the clothes into the hallway.... make it a bit easier..I will be too tired from night feeds ....and only the 3 hours of xbox a night.....:w00t:


:lol:

You'll be fine babes xxx

Sorry my caps lock was stuck lol
#38
Adam2050
Oh btw whos multi are you? 1st post since 2004?


quick go back through the screen names and find another for Oct04!!

--plus check out their deals :p

'fess up mango :)
#39
Adam2050
Oh btw whos multi are you? 1st post since 2004?


Ohhhh you're getting cynical in your old age Adam !
#40
deb8z
Ohhhh you're getting cynical in your old age Adam !


Old = every right to be :w00t: Young lady...:):whistling:

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