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Tesco Joke

Nemz Avatar
8y, 7m agoPosted 8 years, 7 months ago
One day, in line at the work's cafeteria, Jack says to Mike behind him,
'my elbow hurts like hell, I suppose I'd better see a doctor!' Listen,
don't waste your time down at the surgery, Mike replies. There's a
diagnostic computer at Tesco. Just give it a urine sample and the computer
will tell you what's wrong and what to do about it. It takes ten
seconds and only costs five quid. ...a lot quicker and better than a doctor
and you get Club card points. So Jack collects a urine sample in a
small jar and takes it to Tesco. He deposits five pounds and the computer
lights up and asks for the urine sample. He pours the sample into the
slot and waits. Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a printout. You
have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy activity.
It will improve in two weeks. That evening while thinking how amazing
this new technology was, Jack began wondering if the computer could be
fooled. He mixed some tap water, a stool
sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife and daughter and
'pleasured himself' into the mixture for good measure. Jack hurried back to
Tesco, eager to check what would happen. He deposits five pounds,
pours in his concoction and awaits the results. The computer prints the
following: 1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. 2. Your
dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo. 3. Your daughter
has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab. 4. Your wife is pregnant. Twins.
They aren't yours. Get a lawyer. 5. And if you don't stop playing with
yourself, your elbow will never get better....Thank you for shopping
at Tesco.
Other Links From Tesco:
Nemz Avatar
8y, 7m agoPosted 8 years, 7 months ago
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All Comments

(6) Jump to unreadPost a comment
Comments/page:
#1
LOL good one.

A Tesco Value hot.
#2
Like it:-D
#3
Lol. Good one.
#4
Every Little Helps
#5
nice one
#6
hehe.

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