The public disapproval zone - marks out of ten for a 5-minute poem? (And what's the HUKD connection?) - HotUKDeals
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The public disapproval zone - marks out of ten for a 5-minute poem? (And what's the HUKD connection?)

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To her he was a darling man. Not tall perhaps but heroically strong. Sure and proud of himself. He was. Happy she was. His calculated charm was clear. They basked in his glory. Like he… Read More
Liddle ol' me Avatar
7y, 11m agoPosted 7 years, 11 months ago
To her he was a darling man.
Not tall perhaps but heroically strong.
Sure and proud of himself.
He was.

Happy she was.

His calculated charm was clear.
They basked in his glory.
Like her, they adored him!
Nearly all.

Satisfied she was.

His politeness broken only in humour.
Handsome boasts were his!
They hardly noticed at all.
Not always.

Content she was.

A lover of magnificent proportions!
She generously helped him know.
He was surely good.
He surely was.

Thoughtful she was.

True he was: protector, brother, father, lover.
Often promising to bring her home.
The excuses were true.
HE was true!

but in the end the truth was there, on homely table laid out bare, she withered and died in that home, defiled in public disapproval zone.

Beautiful she was.
Liddle ol' me Avatar
7y, 11m agoPosted 7 years, 11 months ago
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#1
well it would be a lot better if it rhymed in my ignorance of poetry..........so i'm afraid it gets a 1 out of 10 PLEASE TRY HARDER!:|:|
#2
transit
well it would be a lot better if it rhymed in my ignorance of poetry..........so i'm afraid it gets a 1 out of 10 PLEASE TRY HARDER!:|:|


1/10! :shock:
#3
5 minute?

But seriously, is our subject a large phallus'd alpha male with an ego to match?

7/10 for suggestiveness . . . . not autobiographical was it Liddle? :whistling:
#4
transit;5241745
well it would be a lot better if it rhymed in my ignorance of poetry..........so i'm afraid it gets a 1 out of 10 PLEASE TRY HARDER!:|:|

Poetry is not about the rhyme (they are called rhymes btw) poetry should instead just flow like the caress of a lovers fingers down your spine
#5
brave of you to post

The poem was well thought out but average if I'm being honest.
#6
mbgringo
5 minute?

But seriously, is our subject a large phallus'd alpha male with an ego to match?

7/10 for suggestiveness . . . . not autobiographical was it Liddle? :whistling:


7/10 is too generous, but better than 1/10.

Our subject is an alpha male but probably not large in any department. And no it's not about me. :)
#7
harlzter
Poetry is not about the rhyme (they are called rhymes btw) poetry should instead just flow like the caress of a lovers fingers down your spine


hehe - we have a real poet among us :thumbsup: :-D

phatboy123
brave of you to post

The poem was well thought out but average if I'm being honest.


Average is a fair assessment. Probably below average tbh. But then again maybe average for a 5-minute job that attempts to be transparent. :thumbsup:
#8
i'll asses and compare it in my exms
#9
strike
i'll asses and compare it in my exms


Good man! :-D ... if you're good detective you'll also be able to work out the meaning. It has a HUKD connection, if that helps... :whistling: (added that to title too in case any one else has perceptive eyes)
#10
I think its fair for a 5 minute attempt so would say 6/10

Can't for the life in me fathom out the connection but the obvious does tend to pass me by
#11
is this a bg1 thread :p
#12
fireheaven
I think its fair for a 5 minute attempt so would say 6/10

Can't for the life in me fathom out the connection but the obvious does tend to pass me by


6/10 will do me. I think it's about a 5/10 at most myself :) I suppose you'd have to know what sparked it to make the connection. I doubt many could guess, now that I think about it.
#13
A darling man?

Quite like it :) I couldn't do anywhere near as good. The best I could do would be some lame limerick
#14
bellabonkers
A darling man?

Quite like it :) I couldn't do anywhere near as good. The best I could do would be some lame limerick


Yes, she's quite delusional at the beginning of the poem :-D

Thanks - 'quite like' suits me :thumbsup:
#15
kungfu
is this a bg1 thread :p


Sorry, I missed your post. Didn't specifically have BG1 in mind, but you are on the right lines ;-)

p.s. where did bg1 go anyway? haven't seen him on here in yonks
#16
Poetry not my strong point but sounds a bit incestuous to me

Are you the poet?
Its better than anything I could put together but thats not saying much. Not being a poetry critic I could not rate it properly either but :thumbsup:
banned#17
3/10 as you didn't have a moan about the police or the like.. back to the drawing board
#18
WoolyM
Poetry not my strong point but sounds a bit incestuous to me

Are you the poet?
Its better than anything I could put together but thats not saying much. Not being a poetry critic I could not rate it properly either but :thumbsup:


Incestuous? What gave you that idea - the brother, father bit I suppose? That wasn't the intended meaning. Rather that was saying something about the woman's position & mindset (perhaps because of cultural background?). Yes, my poem - written in response to something I saw written here that got me thinking. It's a feminist poem btw.

dog_cop
3/10 as you didn't have a moan about the police or the like.. back to the drawing board


I don't moan about the police exclusively - I moan about everything! :w00t:

(Talking of incest, you coppers are far too cliquey. The world is always painted in black and white to you slave-boys to authority. But I digress - that's another poem :p)
banned#19
Liddle ol' me
Incestuous? What gave you that idea - the brother, father bit I suppose? That wasn't the intended meaning. Rather that was saying something about the woman's position & mindset (perhaps because of cultural background?). Yes, my poem - written in response to something I saw written here that got me thinking. It's a feminist poem btw.



I don't moan about the police exclusively - I moan about everything! :w00t:

(Talking of incest, you coppers are far too cliquey. The world is always painted in black and white to you slave-boys to authority. But I digress :p)


ahahaha I knew you couldn't resist it .. I `ll now raise your effort to a 4/10 :p
#20
dog_cop
ahahaha I knew you couldn't resist it .. I `ll now raise your effort to a 4/10 :p


Gimme a 5/10 and I can dance to it! :thumbsup:
banned#21
Liddle ol' me
Gimme a 5/10 and I can dance to it! :thumbsup:


4.5 and that's your lot :thumbsup:
#22
dog_cop
3/10 as you didn't have a moan about the police or the like.. back to the drawing board


Is this anything to do with you?
Where are you parked up tonight?
http://www.hotukdeals.com/forums/showthread.php?t=402538
#23
Liddle ol' me
Incestuous? What gave you that idea - the brother, father bit I suppose? That wasn't the intended meaning. Rather that was saying something about the woman's position & mindset (perhaps because of cultural background?). Yes, my poem - written in response to something I saw written here that got me thinking. It's a feminist poem btw.


Yes. But I already said I was no good at poetry :oops:
banned#24
WoolyM
Is this anything to do with you?
Where are you parked up tonight?
http://www.hotukdeals.com/forums/showthread.php?t=402538


no mine is the unmarked one outside your gaff:thumbsup:
#25
You must be parked double decker styley then. LOL
banned#26
WoolyM
You must be parked double decker styley then. LOL


we get everywhere .. :thumbsup:
#27
WoolyM
Yes. But I already said I was no good at poetry :oops:


Ok, I'll give you some clues. The 'public disapproval zone' is HUKD Misc. The home is just a metaphor. 'They' refer to the Misc crowd. The chief protagonist is not a HUKDer.

That should be enough to crack it. :thumbsup:

p.s. 4.5 is unacceptable d_c
#28
dog_cop
we get everywhere .. :thumbsup:


We had the fire service earlier. Interesting parts to their equipment. :roll:
#29
Liddle ol' me
Ok, I'll give you some clues. The 'public disapproval zone' is HUKD Misc. The home is just a metaphor. 'They' refer to the Misc crowd. The chief protagonist is not a HUKDer.

That should be enough to crack it. :thumbsup:

p.s. 4.5 is unacceptable d_c


Guessed you were refering to misc in some way. Thats as far as I got. :oops:
#30
WoolyM
Guessed you were refering to misc in some way. Thats as far as I got. :oops:


Work harder! The chief protagonist is not be a HUKDer. Who is the chief protagonist and why did I say only chief protagonist when there are two main characters...? ( stretch that mind )
banned#31
Liddle ol' me
Work harder! The chief protagonist is not be a HUKDer. Who is the chief protagonist and why did I say only chief protagonist when there are two main characters...? ( stretch that mind )


F&F:thumbsup:
#32
dog_cop
F&F:thumbsup:


http://img17.imageshack.us/img17/5862/cowbelm.gif
banned#33
boothy
http://img17.imageshack.us/img17/5862/cowbelm.gif


ahahahah quality :thumbsup:
#34
dog_cop
F&F:thumbsup:


You are just stabbing in the dark (hope you don't do that for real on duty :p). And anyway, you'd need to present some reason why the poem is connected to your answer. I can't think of anything that would connect it to F&F. :?
1 Like #35
Is there a bykergrove connection?
#36
WoolyM
Is there a bykergrove connection?


See. All it took was a little bit of thought. I knew you'd get there :thumbsup:
#37
Liddle ol' me
See. All it took was a little bit of thought. I knew you'd get there :thumbsup:


More sure than I was then. Almost a complete stab in the dark on my part
#38
WoolyM
More sure than I was then. Almost a complete stab in the dark on my part


Don't you start with the stabs in the dark! I'm starting to fear turning of the light tonight :)

But you are too modest. Something must have clicked to even guess. I think you have to write a poem of your own now and let me have a crack at it :thumbsup:
#39
Gonna hit the sack now. If I dream anything special maybe.
#40
Bykergrove and chesso?

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