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whats your opinion on christinings??

xxprincessNxx Avatar
banned6y, 10m agoPosted 6 years, 10 months ago
ok so whats your opinions on christinings??
have u and ur oh had problems deciding if ur baby will b christned or not??

stories please!!
xx
xxprincessNxx Avatar
banned6y, 10m agoPosted 6 years, 10 months ago
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#1
im not christened, mainly cos my Dad had religion stuffed down his throught when he wasa kid and didnt want the same thing happening to me, my grand parents dragged me to church a few times though and that again put me right off.
im know offically a jedi, and so his my son. he can open [COLOR=#c0c0c0](automatic)[/COLOR] doors using the force.
#2
how can babies be old enough to make a decision to choose a religion? should they not be allowed to make that choice when they are older?
#3
hi

i think its a personal choice, my boys are, but my daughter isn't...

maybe these days it should be left to the kids to decide when older?
unless your have religious beliefs...

also some ppl think its a good excuse for a party ( i have a friend whos babies christening was that) lol
#4
jellybaby22
im not christened..neither is my daughter and neither will my new baby....
they can decide when they are older...


your talking a lot of sense today jellybaby:thumbsup:

i thought i would put something more than +1 after your post:)
#5
Nope I'm not and neither are my boys. Decided if they wanted to do it they could decide when they were older and they're now 16 and 19 and not bothered.
Each to their own is my thoughts. My mother in law wanted the boys christened but like I said to her..."the only reason your family have them is for a p**s up and thats not the right reason". :roll:
#6
badgerrules
how can babies be old enough to make a decision to choose a religion? should they not be allowed to make that choice when they are older?


I know what you are saying, but don't you have to start them off somewhere?

That's like saying don't send them to school at 5 let them learn for themselves.

You have to guide children along from the start, I hate to add an old cliche but perhaps that is why children are growing up with less and less respect.
#7
None of my 4 children are christened. Its their choice when they are older as far as Im concerned.
banned#8
greg_68

You have to guide children along from the start, I hate to add an old cliche but perhaps that is why children are growing up with less and less respect.


Wasn't going to have it done, but now you've said that it's made me think. Me and the wife were both christened and we turned out alright :-D
#9
I'm christined.

Means nothing to me.

Didnt get my daughter christined
#10
im having my daughter christened next month, im not religeous but my partner is catholic so we decided to have her christened, i wont be forcing religion down her throat she can decide if she wants to follow when shes old enough, i was christened as a child and didnt follow the religion and its done me no harm.
#11
I'm with a URC Church so they don't do Christenings only dedications
banned#12
I can understand why Catholics used to do it - let's face it, if you're going to believe in part of the doctrine, you might as well go the whole hog and believe all the crazy stuff.

I'm not, because my parents weren't religious/silly/brainwashed/insecure (delete as appropriate).
suspended#13
Im christened, but my babys arent... tbh i would of but the dad was dead set against it :)
banned#14
pink-ka
im having my daughter christened next month, im not religeous but my partner is catholic so we decided to have her christened, i wont be forcing religion down her throat she can decide if she wants to follow when shes old enough, i was christened as a child and didnt follow the religion and its done me no harm.


You'll just be foisting a religious ceremony upon her when she has no choice in the matter.

I'm sure you aren't just doing it because your husband tells you to though:thumbsup:
#15
#16
As long as none of them turn out like Stephen on Big Brother :giggle:
#17
badgerrules
how can babies be old enough to make a decision to choose a religion? should they not be allowed to make that choice when they are older?


+1 my husband and myself are both catholics, we made the choice not to have our three kids christened, but we will teach them about different religions and they can make up their own mind when they are older, having said that they are going to a predominatly catholic school, but we choose it because it is the best school in the area not because of its religion
#18
myself and o/h are both christened,
my daughter isnt.
Ive always encouraged her to think for herself and felt the choice was hers to make when she is ready.
Having said that, the nearest primary is a catholic one and is where all her nursery friends where enrolled, therefore this is where she attends (P1) so of course she is getting daily RE classes,
Bit of a dilemma now though in that do we ger her christened to make communion / confirmation with class mates or just withdraw her from all of that ?

I dont think you need religion to bring up a child in the best possible way,
faith is great if its what you are after, but i consider myself more a spiritual person than a religious one.
Personally i try to encourage my daughter to be an honest and caring person and to consider other people and their feelings, although only 5yrs i talk to her about everything and encourage her to think about her actions etc, and have respect for others
i dont have to be a practicing catholic to instill good values in her, you just have to be a basically decent person (IMO)

On a side note, yes i've known many people use it as an excuse for a p*ss up, or for the gift giving ! , and not just christenings either, but thats another topic.
Personally i think if it isnt done for the right reasons it shouldnt be done at all.
#19
tracyhay
+1 my husband and myself are both catholics, we made the choice not to have our three kids christened, but we will teach them about different religions and they can make up their own mind when they are older, having said that they are going to a predominatly catholic school, but we choose it because it is the best school in the area not because of its religion


I think there is something fundamentally wrong about 'faith' schools. How dare they mix religion with education... A school locally fails to teach the pro-choice side of abortion and actively blocks websites containing pro-choice content due to it's 'Catholic ethos'.

Selection of teachers should be on quality not if they choose to believe in a God or book yet TES regularly advertises for teachers in faith schools that must share the religion of the school. Disgusting.

There should be no selection of pupils - everyone has a right to 'the best school in the area' - don't you think?

Be aware that this 'best school' may actually deny your children to access a full curriculum because individuals within it's walls may not personally like (of believe their God approves of) some topics.
#20
my 3 boys are christened, this is our choice and should they choose not to join the church and be confirmed at an age when they can make the choice that is fine with us.

should they wish to marry in church they will need to be christened and i believe it is easier to do that when they are babies than to be christened as adults.
for god parents the church is much more relaxed, one god parent is agnostic another catholic and another hindu, not a problem, the christening service is to offer to protect, and to support the child to grow up a good and moral person not necessarily a christian person. as i mentioned that is what a confirmation service is for, you cannot take communion until you are confirmed only be blessed.
#21
i like cake
#22
Alfonse
i like cake


Me too, especially the jam sponges M&S do for their birthday cakes :-D
#23
[email protected]
I think there is something fundamentally wrong about 'faith' schools. How dare they mix religion with education... A school locally fails to teach the pro-choice side of abortion and actively blocks websites containing pro-choice content due to it's 'Catholic ethos'.

Selection of teachers should be on quality not if they choose to believe in a God or book yet TES regularly advertises for teachers in faith schools that must share the religion of the school. Disgusting.

There should be no selection of pupils - everyone has a right to 'the best school in the area' - don't you think?


actually the school does take children from any religion, so anyone who wants in can get in, but it is still predomiantly catholic, the religion is not forced upon them at all they dont take them to church and you can withdraw your child from the once a week RE, and it is a primary school so I dont think I need to worry about them learning about abortions yet, but that is something that I can teach her about. We investigated all this before we chose this school, and maybe its a good thing that they are not yet subjected to all the horrors of life after all she is only 4,

also why is it not ok for them to mix religion and eduction as it is important for them to know about all the different religions (RE is not just about being catholic) and beliefs that people have so that they can make up their own mind on what they believe and what they do not, so IMO its adding to their education
#24
FilthAndFurry
I can understand why Catholics used to do it - let's face it, if you're going to believe in part of the doctrine, you might as well go the whole hog and believe all the crazy stuff.

I'm not, because my parents weren't religious/silly/brainwashed/insecure (delete as appropriate).


.....and look how you turned out :oops:
#25
tracyhay
actually the school does take children from any religion, so anyone who wants in can get in, but it is still predomiantly catholic, the religion is not forced upon them at all they dont take them to church and you can withdraw your child from the once a week RE, and it is a primary school so I dont think I need to worry about them learning about abortions yet, but that is something that I can teach her about


Abortion is the tip of the iceberg. I feel it is simply wrong to make decisions about staff that in any other circumstances would be illegal. If a school fails to employ me because I am not a Catholic then that is permitted. If they failed to employ me based on any other criteria (sex, sexuality, race etc) then it would be illegal.

What about euthanasia? A 'faith school' fails to provide a balance and makes children think they are different. It encourages this. Children can live on the same road and never play together because one is a 'Catholic child' and the other is a 'Muslim child'... we all need to realise that they are not either of these things and a balanced education is the only way true social intergration will happen.
banned#26
civms47
.....and look how you turned out :oops:


You may have a point. I should've been dunked:thumbsup:
#27
tracyhay
actually the school does take children from any religion


This may be the case but it isn't an accurate picture of what actually happens. As an atheist my children would not go there because I think faith schools fail in the main goal of a school - faith comes first, education second.

A Muslim would not send their children there... you get the idea...
#28
before babies came along had a big argument :)
no christinings.
no god parents
no middle names
no calling friends of family uncle / aunt...

i did give in on middle names :)
banned#29
FilthAndFurry
I can understand why Catholics used to do it - let's face it, if you're going to believe in part of the doctrine, you might as well go the whole hog and believe all the crazy stuff.

I'm not, because my parents weren't religious / silly / brainwashed / insecure /[COLOR="Blue"] too poor [/COLOR](highlight as appropriate).


Both of my kids have been Christened, not because we are religous or want the kids to be. It's just a meaningless piece of paper at the end of the day.

But come on...... any excuse for a good drink with ya family mates is a good excuse.:thumbsup:
#30
I was christened, as virtually all of my generation were. I am 58. I also chose to be confirmed into the CoE and take communion. I am now an aetheist and we did not have either of our sons baptised.

westmorlandlife

should they wish to marry in church they will need to be christened and i believe it is easier to do that when they are babies than to be christened as adults.
.

This isn't correct. You only have to show a connection to the church in which you want to be married, which can be that you have lived in the parish for 6 months.
http://www.yourchurchwedding.org/youre-welcome/more-churches-to-choose-from.aspx
#31
[email protected]
Abortion is the tip of the iceberg. I feel it is simply wrong to make decisions about staff that in any other circumstances would be illegal. If a school fails to employ me because I am not a Catholic then that is permitted. If they failed to employ me based on any other criteria (sex, sexuality, race etc) then it would be illegal.

What about euthanasia? A 'faith school' fails to provide a balance and makes children think they are different. It encourages this. Children can live on the same road and never play together because one is a 'Catholic child' and the other is a 'Muslim child'... we all need to realise that they are not either of these things and a balanced education is the only way true social intergration will happen.


school is not the only place that my children will learn things you know, why would my child discriminate against someone of a differnet race/religion she is not being raised with christianity shoved down her throat, maybe you should take a trip down to birmingham where there are signs on the motorway that say 'black country' because the area is predominately black people there is social intergration for you! (I didnt think the signs where for real either until you stop at the petorl station and the black person working in it makes you pay for the petrol before you put it in the car just because you are white) please note that I did see them allowing another black person fill up before paying so that was not just me assuming!
1 Like #32
i find it a bit worrying that so many people believe all churches are extreme in their views. it is not the case the church has vastly modernised, so many people appear intimidated by the idea of church and then come across as very biased, if they don't understand it then it must be wrong.

i don't ask my kids to go to church and i certainly will not push any thoughts "down their throats" i just want them to be aware of all the options and never afraid.
those who do not believe in christenings, will you take it so well if your child wants to know more or will you stick to your belief that anything to do with faith is wrong. do you know enough about the church to give a fair and frank explanation to your child?
#33
I didn't want my boy Christened but my girlfriend went ahead anyway because all her family are, like other people have said I want my boy to decide for himself.
#34
westmorlandlife
i find it a bit worrying that so many people believe all churches are extreme in their views. it is not the case the church has vastly modernised, so many people appear intimidated by the idea of church and then come across as very biased, if they don't understand it then it must be wrong.
i don't ask my kids to go to church and i certainly will not push any thoughts "down their throats" i just want them to be aware of all the options and never afraid.
those who do not believe in christenings, will you take it so well if your child wants to know more or will you stick to your belief that anything to do with faith is wrong. do you know enough about the church to give a fair and frank explanation to your child?


I couldnt have put it better myself thank you rep added
#35
this is true but often the vicar asks for more, i know ours will not marry unless christened and not divorced.

this leaves the church free for those who really believe in church vows and not those who just want a big white wedding.
#36
tracyhay
[/B]

school is not the only place that my children will learn things you know, why would my child discriminate against someone of a differnet race/religion she is not being raised with christianity shoved down her throat, maybe you should take a trip down to birmingham where there are signs on the motorway that say 'black country' because the area is predominately black people there is social intergration for you! (I didnt think the signs where for real either until you stop at the petorl station and the black person working in it makes you pay for the petrol before you put it in the car just because you are white) please note that I did see them allowing another black person fill up before paying so that was not just me assuming!


I'm not saying that you will. I actually think you are very considerate and thoughtful and clearly care enough about other people's opinions to discuss them in an open forum. I know that faith schools do harm communities and I can't see any advantages that a faith school can offer that a secular alternative doesn't. If the best school in your area is a faith school then this needs to be addressed. I would say it is very likely that it isn't a good school because of the Catholic ethos - there are other factors at play.

Again, I'm not critising you personally or your decisions - I simply disagree with the generally accepted idea that a school can define itself as 'faith' (and potentially deny me a job as a non-believer, legally)
#37
westmorlandlife
i find it a bit worrying that so many people believe all churches are extreme in their views. it is not the case the church has vastly modernised, so many people appear intimidated by the idea of church and then come across as very biased, if they don't understand it then it must be wrong.

i don't ask my kids to go to church and i certainly will not push any thoughts "down their throats" i just want them to be aware of all the options and never afraid.
those who do not believe in christenings, will you take it so well if your child wants to know more or will you stick to your belief that anything to do with faith is wrong. do you know enough about the church to give a fair and frank explanation to your child?


I don't believe that all churches are extreme. I simply question what they ADD to society and in this thread, education in particular. I propse that nothing is added but perhaps balance and reason could be lost (in some). There are also extreme churches/schools that 'educate' children in ways that most people would view as appauling.

I can't put it better than Christopher Hitchens:

"Most (believers) believe that without religion their children, and even they, would not know right from wrong. I have two arguments to which no answer has yet been received.

One: Name me a moral kindness or action that they can do because of their belief but that I can't.

Two: Can you think of one evil action done by a religion person? You can, and you can think of another, and another."
banned#38
westmorlandlife
i find it a bit worrying that so many people believe all churches are extreme in their views. it is not the case the church has vastly modernised, so many people appear intimidated by the idea of church and then come across as very biased, if they don't understand it then it must be wrong.

i don't ask my kids to go to church and i certainly will not push any thoughts "down their throats" i just want them to be aware of all the options and never afraid.
those who do not believe in christenings, will you take it so well if your child wants to know more or will you stick to your belief that anything to do with faith is wrong. do you know enough about the church to give a fair and frank explanation to your child?


Believing in a 'god' is extreme.

If my child asked, I'd explain that there is absolutely no proof of there being a 'god'.
banned#39
westmorlandlife
this is true but often the vicar asks for more, i know ours will not marry unless christened and not divorced.

this leaves the church free for those who really believe in church vows and not those who just want a big white wedding.


How does he check they're virgins?
#40
westmorlandlife
this is true but often the vicar asks for more, i know ours will not marry unless christened and not divorced.

this leaves the church free for those who really believe in church vows and not those who just want a big white wedding.


http://i261.photobucket.com/albums/ii78/chesso_photos/baptised.jpg

http://www.yourchurchwedding.org/faqs/i39m-not-baptised-i-don39t-go-to-church-can-i-still-get-married-in-church.aspx

I point this out only because you made the point; which might influence whether a child is christened or not and it is a fact that you do not have to be baptised to have a CoE church wedding. Your vicar may ask for more but CoE policy is quite clear.

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