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Whats your views, on being/having an only child?

Lulu'sMammy Avatar
7y, 5m agoPosted 7 years, 5 months ago
Simple, as stated in the title.

Don't even bother posting if its arguing, bickering, BG hating etc, just nice simple views :)

sorry that I can't reply, but I'm busy in bed
- lumoruk
Lulu'sMammy Avatar
7y, 5m agoPosted 7 years, 5 months ago
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#1
I think it's always better to have a brother or sister, not totally sure why. I have 2 girls and it is so nice to see them playing and interacting with each other, and the older one is so protective of the younger one too! :)
banned#2
I think i'd only have one or two.

having just one usually makes that child veer to the extremes eg solid extrovert or introvert.

also more likely to be spoilt and socially inept.

my opinions and observations btw not scientifically proven.
#3
What's your view LL'sM?
#4
I'm an only child. I love it.
#5
I think kids need to be around other kids even if they dont always get on,I know families who have just one child and they seem to grow up far too fast spending most of their time around adults,
#6
i think that a son or daughter should always havea sibling of a similar age until they are old enough to go out and play with their friends. it teaches them about friendship and how to share.

btw i have a sister and a brother.
#7
Well I ended up being the only one, not through choice....

I wish my mum had had more though when they are gone I will have no one, and that plays on my mind a lot. I feel so envious when people talk about doing things with their siblings.
#8
Only children always seem a bit "spoiled", indeed if there are a good number of years between siblings the eldest can do too.

Have 2 close (ish) together, to get it over with if you must :)


just an opinion, no offence intended to only children :thumbsup:
banned#9
I have an only child. I never meant that to be the case but it's just how it's turned out. I think they miss out on a lot with not having a sibling. However hard I try he always think the whole world revolves around him even when playing with other kids :roll: I think it must be quite lonely too.
#10
thesaint;5926296
What's your view LL'sM?

I was happy as i am, UNTIL i seen a young girl in the back of a car travelling back from a caravan holiday. She obviously had everything she wanted by looking at her, but she just looked lonely....probably total wrong end of the stick but its really made me think.
Also my mother in law, so much pressure on her as a only child, now that her parents are elderly.
#11
No problems having just the one. Grew up with 6 brothers and 1 sister, more spare cash with less children, but more fun enjoying more than one growing up
#12
I was an only child until I was 8 and I was over the moon when my little sister came along, I think it maybe can be a bit lonely sometimes when you are an only child, I grew up with mostly adults and it maybe does make you grow up that bit faster....

I love seeing my little girls playing with each other, making them realise that they need to share, and think about other kids too :)
#13
When my eldest was younger ( he was only days over being 3 when his brother was born) i was constantly being aked , when was i having another? I was told t wasn't fair to just have one, they'd get lonely etc. In the end we decided on another - not because of anyone elses input (except partners haha) We now have two and i am MORE than happy to have just the two, i do not think i could cope with anymore, these two are a handful on their own.
I know people with 8 and people with 5 but also people with 1 (that are happy), personally i am sticking at 2 so they don't miss out (activities etc)
Some people will be happy with 1, 2 5 etc. I am happy with my two in our own house. A friend of mine has 1 child and would of liked another but can't afford it- i think although its sad (for her) she is sensible.
#14
I'm not an only child but my brother was in high school when i was born, so by the time i was old enought to think about it he had moved out to uni... so with the age gap did grow up as an older child ( would of lived a little bro/ sis to play with and mother :0
#15
i have three myself, 13, 10 & 8 and especially in the holidays you appreciate this - they all play together, share same interests etc. i know some people dont have the choice of having anymore than one but given the choice i think it is nice for them to have a sibling or siblings!
#16
I think nobody except an only child can answer this one,and as people are all different the answers will not be all the same.
#17
I have 6 brothers and 3 sisters they've all taught me alot and I enjoy it always having someone to talk to enjoy watching tv together go to the park help out it's all good.
#18
Did not like being an only child ( my half brother disowned my Mum when she walked out on him,there about 15yrs difference between me and him so I got brought up as only child myself ).

As for my own children well I think it's good company for each other,yeh sure my 2 bicker and argue sometimes but they pretty close,it's nice to have at least 2 together anyway I think.
banned#19
What are people's thoughts on age gaps? i always wanted 2 close together maybe 18months to 2 years between. My son is coming up 6 now though. I don't know if I've left it too late now and it would cause problems with jealousy etc? I think it's easier with a big age gap if you have a girl because they want to mother the baby.
#20
wendyak
I think nobody except an only child can answer this one,and as people are all different the answers will not be all the same.

Thats why i asked for views.
#21
Personally my religious views teach me to have many kids.

Though I know the difficulties the world has created to make it hard to have more then one child or a decent size family especially in Britain.

I'm going for a round value of 3 when I'm ready.

I think it changes the child being a only child, neither for the good or the bad.

I know most of my friends or ex girlfriends have longed for a big family.

I'm one of 9 including steps.
#22
its ur call hun....better to have one raised well then 2 that are unhappy for whatever reason.

3 years between my first and second....i had such an intense desire to provide him a sibling. and they play so well together. but then i know only kids at school and their parnet pay so much attnetion to them..taking them to different groups and clubs so they dont feel they miss out.

good luck whatever u choose....think u might just be broody?!
#23
I only had one sister who was older than me. By the time I was five,she was seventeen and had moved out of the family home. I always felt lonely and was envious of my friends who all had brothers and sisters.
#24
magicbeans
its ur call hun....better to have one raised well then 2 that are unhappy for whatever reason.

3 years between my first and second....i had such an intense desire to provide him a sibling. and they play so well together. but then i know only kids at school and their parnet pay so much attnetion to them..taking them to different groups and clubs so they dont feel they miss out.

good luck whatever u choose....think u might just be broody?!

I am FAR from broody lol!
#25
The Crow
What are people's thoughts on age gaps? i always wanted 2 close together maybe 18months to 2 years between. My son is coming up 6 now though. I don't know if I've left it too late now and it would cause problems with jealousy etc? I think it's easier with a big age gap if you have a girl because they want to mother the baby.


Whats to say a boy won't want to "mother" a new baby.....you may be supprised :)
At 6 years old he will understand more and you can make him feel really special by allowing him to help with a new baby.
I guess you will only know if you go for it.
#26
I always thought my little girl would be jealous when her little sister came along, as she had been spoilt and had only been her for 3 years, but she loves her little sister, is never ever jealous of her and totally loves playing with her and sticks up for her all the time :)
#27
hello lulus mummy - how many children have you got and their ages? have you only got lulu?
#28
The Crow
What are people's thoughts on age gaps? i always wanted 2 close together maybe 18months to 2 years between. My son is coming up 6 now though. I don't know if I've left it too late now and it would cause problems with jealousy etc? I think it's easier with a big age gap if you have a girl because they want to mother the baby.


You just never know,my youngest is jealous of the older one,but she can be nasty piece of work,she 6,he just turned 9 so they about 2hf yrs apart.
There another on way shortly,but she seems to be really looking forward to it,not been jealous as of yet. I do keep them very involved though and took them to rouine scans and stuff.

Usually people think the older ones are jelaous of the 1 below them but it don't work like that with my 2,it's def other way round here.
#29
18 months between our 2, we planned to have 2 with that age gap, we had boy 1st then my daughter.
#30
juliesbargains
hello lulus mummy - how many children have you got and their ages? have you only got lulu?

Lulu is my dog, and i have 2 of them lol! I do however have only one gorgeous baby!
#31
richp
18 months between our 2, we planned to have 2 with that age gap, we had boy 1st then my daughter.

Id crack up.
#32
rosie2008
I only had one sister who was older than me. By the time I was five,she was seventeen and had moved out of the family home. I always felt lonely and was envious of my friends who all had brothers and sisters.


Ditto...well sort of. My brother was only 3 years older than me but I was 11 when he was sent to bording school... I missed him when he wasn't there yet we would fight during the holidays when he came home.
I really wish i'd had someone around all the time.
#33
Lulu'sMammy
I was happy as i am, UNTIL i seen a young girl in the back of a car travelling back from a caravan holiday. She obviously had everything she wanted by looking at her, but she just looked lonely....probably total wrong end of the stick but its really made me think.
Also my mother in law, so much pressure on her as a only child, now that her parents are elderly.


I think that's pretty much the thing. Life's kinda rubbish when you're on your own, and when there's no-one like you around. I think it' a natural part of human psycology that we naturally seek out and take kindly to those that are similar to us, so there's probably something pretty major missing in the life of a kid that doesn't have a sibling.

That all aside though, my experience of only-childs is that they've all been a bit weird. My neighbour's one. xxxxxxxxxx, of course, but she is a bit weird. Looking at my little cousins though, there's three of them, and although the boy seems a bit left-out, the two girls are a very tight little unit of continuous conversation. Of course they **** each other off, and the things the younger of the two says about ehr by txt tend not to be that nice, but they wouldn't be complete without each other.
#34
There's a bit of an age gap between me and my sisters - 6 years between the middle sister and almost 20 years between me and the younger one !! Me and my middle sister are really close and still spend loads of time together, especially as our kids are similar ages, so they all get to play together all the time too.

As for my youngest sister, we feel quite sorry for her because she moved over to Cyprus with my mum when she was about 2 years old and has basically grown up as an only child as the only family she has out there (on her dads side) are all grown ups or teenagers at the late end of teens. She's got everything she wants but still wishes she was over here with us lot because she misses being part of the family with all the kids playing together.
#35
dxx
I think that's pretty much the thing. Life's kinda rubbish when you're on your own, and when there's no-one like you around. I think it' a natural part of human psycology that we naturally seek out and take kindly to those that are similar to us, so there's probably something pretty major missing in the life of a kid that doesn't have a sibling.

That all aside though, my experience of only-childs is that they've all been a bit weird. My neighbour's one. I'd still bone her, of course, but she is a bit weird. Looking at my little cousins though, there's three of them, and although the boy seems a bit left-out, the two girls are a very tight little unit of continuous conversation. Of course they **** each other off, and the things the younger of the two says about ehr by txt tend not to be that nice, but they wouldn't be complete without each other.

You do make me laugh you do!
#36
bellabonkers
Ditto...well sort of. My brother was only 3 years older than me but I was 11 when he was sent to bording school... I missed him when he wasn't there yet we would fight during the holidays when he came home.
I really wish i'd had someone around all the time.


lol Strange how we go through that love/hate relationship:) My sis felt more like a mum to me when I was young but we sure caught up on the arguements when I became a teenager:w00t:
#37
I am an only child and my family is very small anyway, only me and my Mum left.

When I was younger I did used to get lonely and bored (and I was spoilt) but I was happy to be an only child because I had my Mum and Dad's full attention and only ever really saw my friend's fighting with their siblings.

When I look back now, though, I so wish that my Mum and Dad did have more children as I think I would have had a 'happier' (possibly not the right word) upbringing.

Also, now that my Mum is old and I am her full-time carer I not only have no-one to share the responsibility with in caring for her, but also when she does go then that is the end of my blood family, barr my own children.

I made the effort to have 2 close together and said I would have another when my son turned 4 (which is now :-D) but have decided to go back into further education for now

I feel the need to state that I am NOT weird, though :p
#38
7 years between my 2. But am glad oldest isn't a only child. She loves being a big sis.
[helper]#39
I hated being an only. I always felt that I had to live up to my mothers expectations. I must have been quite a disappointment to her! I always wished for a sibling to share the pressure.
#40
richp:
18 months between our 2, we planned to have 2 with that age gap, we had boy 1st then my daughter.

Lulu'sMammy
Id crack up.



they get on so well together, son has just turned 16 & daughter 14, no trouble at all when they were babies.

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