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worst thing that's happened to you in your life*

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*must **NOT** include death/divorce etc etc as this is a FUNNY thread. i was about seven i think, playing on a field near my house. some older boys (might as well have been men, they were probably … Read More
scrumpypaul Avatar
6y, 9m agoPosted 6 years, 9 months ago
*must **NOT** include death/divorce etc etc as this is a FUNNY thread.

i was about seven i think, playing on a field near my house. some older boys (might as well have been men, they were probably mid-teens therefore three times my size) had dragged a length of rope through some dog muck. one of them threw it at me, a bit like a disgusting, stinking bola.

well he was a good shot cos it wrapped around my neck.

i can still remember the minging walk home to get my mother to wash me down.



nowadays, the cops would have been called and local MP involved yadda yadda yadda



anyway, orrible things that have happened to you please................




















(i can feel the 35 years of tension flowing away from me just by telling my story)
scrumpypaul Avatar
6y, 9m agoPosted 6 years, 9 months ago
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#1
Theres too many!!
#2
i know, i know - but just pick one good one. come on, don't be shy........................
#3
I had a smilar ' traumatic' experience , involving dog crap!!! I was about 7/8 years old doing handstands, cartwheels etc ( as little girls do !) and i done a handstand and went over into the crab and then lay on the grass, i got up and 'the smell' !!:oops: bork now thinking about it.
Several hoursin the bath later and 15 hairwashes i was convinced i could still smell dog muck :w00t:

Scarred for life i am !:)
#4
Also aged about 7 or 8 i got stuck in a toilet cubicle in Hunstanton, Norfolk. I seem to remember my parents were playing bingo & i had said i was going to the toilet. It seemed at the time i had been stuck in there for hours crying with nobody hearing me until my dad came in & managed to get the door open telling me he was worried when i wasn't back after 10 minutes. Strange how you remember those sort of things.
banned#5
I remember this one time I got a divorce so I killed myself!
#6
Worst thing to happen in my life? I joined HUKD...Now I'm antisocial semi recluse (and now part time troll) with bad eyesight (from constantly staring at my laptop) and an empty bank account (from buying all the bargains that I don't need or probably never use...But hey, I remembered Quidco).
#7
I was mugged by two labradors,to my eternal embarrasement. Taking a throw in at football in the local park these 2 huge labs chasing after each other careered into me throwing me up in the air,broke one ankle,tore ligaments in the other-hobbling about on crutches for weeks afterwards,not ONE person gave me any sympathy-they just laughed out loud that I had been beaten up by "2 andrex puppies"-even the docs and nurses in accident and emergency laughed at me-the curtain in the cubicle kept opening and random nhs workers would ask if I was the one who had been hospitalised by two "yellow assailants" and they would walk away laughing up their sleeve!
#8
ei8hty5ive
Worst thing to happen in my life? I joined HUKD...Now I'm antisocial semi recluse (and now part time troll) with bad eyesight (from constantly staring at my laptop) and an empty bank account (from buying all the bargains that I don't need or probably never use...But hey, I remembered Quidco).


:giggle: can relate to this !^^^^^^^
banned#9
Got out of bed.
#10
the conservatives got back in power
and didn't even get really elected
#11
DLM
Got out of bed.

yawn
#12
robertkay
the conservatives got back in power
and didn't even get really elected


booooooooooooorrringgggggggggggg

i think you're on the wrong site.
#13
I remember being traumatised as a kid because I was running with my mouth open and swallowed a fly...
#14
i fell 15 foot onto my face when i was nine or 10 when i stupidly let go of a rope swing. the swing was on a very tall tree so the rope was really long and was over a steep slope so fell quite far! broke my nose, had 2 black eyes and sprained my wrists so bad i couldn't move both of them for weeks properly.

can still remember the kids at school laughing at my messed up face, lol
1 Like #15
I pooed myself once, that's definately the most embarrasing thing that's ever happened to me. I was about 12years of age and at a football training session....there was a hill which players used to run up quickly during a session to take a pee.....I went up that hill about 5 times over 30mins, i don't even know why as I needed a poo not a wee!!! Anyway 30 minutes later I came down the hill for the 5th time and as I did, I released it all!!......it actuallly felt great as there was so much pressure off my bum, but then I had to negotiate my way out of the training ground to my dad and somehow explain to him that his 12year old son had soiled his pants.....it was a funny style of walk, kinda keeping my legs shut and plodding over to him, he was with other dads so I asked for a private word and explained the embarrasing situation.

He was suprisingly good about it, we went to the nearby leisure centre toilets and threw my pants away ( thank goodness I still wore pants and not boxers back then because it was runny and if I hadn't, this memory cud b even more embarrasing.....I still remember my dad stuffing tissues up his nose and breathing through his mouth as he disposed of my pants....good times
#16
acecatcher3
I pooed myself once, that's definately the most embarrasing thing that's ever happened to me. I was about 12years of age and at a football training session....there was a hill which players used to run up quickly during a session to take a pee.....I went up that hill about 5 times over 30mins, i don't even know why as I needed a poo not a wee!!! Anyway 30 minutes later I came down the hill for the 5th time and as I did, I released it all!!......it actuallly felt great as there was so much pressure off my bum, but then I had to negotiate my way out of the training ground to my dad and somehow explain to him that his 12year old son had soiled his pants.....it was a funny style of walk, kinda keeping my legs shut and plodding over to him, he was with other dads so I asked for a private word and explained the embarrasing situation.

He was suprisingly good about it, we went to the nearby leisure centre toilets and threw my pants away ( thank goodness I still wore pants and not boxers back then because it was runny and if I hadn't, this memory cud b even more embarrasing.....I still remember my dad stuffing tissues up his nose and breathing through his mouth as he disposed of my pants....good times


A) that's pretty disgusting.
B) I can't believe you have told everyone about it on a shopping forum!

Well, at least it shows you have fully recovered from the truama...
#17
acecatcher3
I pooed myself once, that's definately the most embarrasing thing that's ever happened to me. I was about 12years of age and at a football training session....there was a hill which players used to run up quickly during a session to take a pee.....I went up that hill about 5 times over 30mins, i don't even know why as I needed a poo not a wee!!! Anyway 30 minutes later I came down the hill for the 5th time and as I did, I released it all!!......it actuallly felt great as there was so much pressure off my bum, but then I had to negotiate my way out of the training ground to my dad and somehow explain to him that his 12year old son had soiled his pants.....it was a funny style of walk, kinda keeping my legs shut and plodding over to him, he was with other dads so I asked for a private word and explained the embarrasing situation.

He was suprisingly good about it, we went to the nearby leisure centre toilets and threw my pants away ( thank goodness I still wore pants and not boxers back then because it was runny and if I hadn't, this memory cud b even more embarrasing.....I still remember my dad stuffing tissues up his nose and breathing through his mouth as he disposed of my pants....good times


hilarious!!
#18
acecatcher3
I pooed myself once, that's definately the most embarrasing thing that's ever happened to me. I was about 12years of age and at a football training session....there was a hill which players used to run up quickly during a session to take a pee.....I went up that hill about 5 times over 30mins, i don't even know why as I needed a poo not a wee!!! Anyway 30 minutes later I came down the hill for the 5th time and as I did, I released it all!!......it actuallly felt great as there was so much pressure off my bum, but then I had to negotiate my way out of the training ground to my dad and somehow explain to him that his 12year old son had soiled his pants.....it was a funny style of walk, kinda keeping my legs shut and plodding over to him, he was with other dads so I asked for a private word and explained the embarrasing situation.

He was suprisingly good about it, we went to the nearby leisure centre toilets and threw my pants away ( thank goodness I still wore pants and not boxers back then because it was runny and if I hadn't, this memory cud b even more embarrasing.....I still remember my dad stuffing tissues up his nose and breathing through his mouth as he disposed of my pants....good times


yuck, lol
1 Like #19
I shouldn't really post this up, but who cares.

Last year, I bought a new watch from HUKD, so when it arrived the postman also delivered a few random letters, anyway I took the old watch apart and thought it looked like a countdown timer on a bomb. So I played with my new watch for a while, and I just had this idea of pranking my parents with the old one, so as the back of the old watch had glue on it, I stuck a piece of paper to the back of it saying "Better run boom" and turned on the stopwatch. Then I opened up one of these random letters, put it inside it, and glued the letter back up. The prank was suppose to happen at Lunchtime but I ended up going upstairs and having a marathon gaming session until 6pm.

Next thing I know, my brother has ran up the stairs saying "Dad has found a bomb in a letter, and the police are coming here right now and they've told us to leave the house". At this moment, I'm laughing my head off, then realizing I could actually get done for this. I get downstairs, and the old watch is outside away from the house as the Police said it could of been a small explosive device.

Basically the Copper interviewed me for 10 minutes stating he could easily arrest me for a number of things including a Terrorism charge, and I sat there still laughing slightly (in disbelief my parents thought it was a bomb and how they didn't ask me before ringing the old bill and they knew the new watch was coming that morning and I basically woke up to sign for it), but eventually me and the Policeman both understood it was a prank gone wrong, then I find out the Explosives Team was already dispatched and waiting for the go ahead to close down the area in which our house stands. How I didn't get charged for it I honestly don't know.

Pretty sure they still are "interested" in me.
#20
classic



tick tick tick
#21
scrumpypaul
classic



tick tick tick


The mind set I was in when it happened, was so clam and didn't mean much of it, it's only after you think about it and think "that could of actually got bad" - If I was in America who knows what would of happened.
banned#22
i climbed a tree in the park and touched something smooth I looked at what it was and it was a snail I let of of the tree and fell out!

*edit just read some of the other stories... I'll back away slowly and leave*
#23
I was playing basketball early this season when i broke a finger badly, was told at the hospital "no sport for 6 weeks" a week later i broke another (on the other hand and couldnt qrite for 8 weeks) playing basketball :lol: that started a string of injuries that led to me playing one game this whole season :-( subsequently i fell behind at uni cos i couldnt take notes properly and missed some tests, i got exemption from the tests but i would have aced them so it wasnt good lol and ended up failing 2 exams :lol: bad times
#24
bykergrove
i climbed a tree in the park and touched something smooth I looked at what it was and it was a snail I let of of the tree and fell out!

*edit just read some of the other stories... I'll back away slowly and leave*


at least something scared you out of the tree, i just let go of the swing lol :p
i still have a bump on my nose and you can feel a chip in the bone on the side of it :x
#25
Wotwot123
The mind set I was in when it happened, was so clam and didn't mean much of it, it's only after you think about it and think "that could of actually got bad" - If I was in America who knows what would of happened.


:gift: tick tick tick

Awesome!!!

We got a winner!
#26
when i was in primary school i was running from people to get to the toher side before they tigged me & i slipped on the ''safety'' tarmac and hit my head on a metal pole that was part of the stilt walkers, acording to my friend i was only unconcious for about 10 seconds , but when i'd come round stopped crying ect ect .. i had a massive lump allll across my forehead i looked like something out of star treck !! And unfortunatly to this day i have a weird for head and a dint if you push on my head :lol:

oh well.... :lol:
#27
aah96
when i was in primary school i was running from people to get to the toher side before they tigged me & i slipped on the ''safety'' tarmac and hit my head on a metal pole that was part of the stilt walkers, acording to my friend i was only unconcious for about 10 seconds , but when i'd come round stopped crying ect ect .. i had a massive lump allll across my forehead i looked like something out of star treck !! And unfortunatly to this day i have a weird for head and a dint if you push on my head :lol:

oh well.... :lol:


when i was about 7 or 8 i faceplanted it off my bike onto a rock, my nose is squint as a result :lol:
banned#28
I was getting on a busy bus and the bus was quite raised from the pavement. My foot got caught underneath the bus platform and I feel flat on my face to the amusment of every person on the bus. I then had to stand at the front of the bus with 70 people staring at the big mark on my red face. Worst bit, I wasn't even drunk. Bad times !!
#29
micoo
when i was about 7 or 8 i faceplanted it off my bike onto a rock, my nose is squint as a result :lol:


oohhh i was riding down the street on my bike & ran into lamp post :lol:
banned#30
aah96
oohhh i was riding down the street on my bike & ran into lamp post :lol:


You sound like my sister used to be when we went on family bike rides ( we're cool really )
She'd crash every time at least once usually in a more bizzare way every time. Either by cycling into fences, lamposts or panicking around corners and land in a nice big patch of nettles, another time her handle bars came off and she got run over by a another bike.

Good times :lol:
#31
ryman1000
You sound like my sister used to be when we went on family bike rides ( we're cool really )
She'd crash every time at least once usually in a more bizzare way every time. Either by cycling into fences, lamposts or panicking around corners and land in a nice big patch of nettles, another time her handle bars came off and she got run over by a another bike.

Good times :lol:



LMAO , im really clumsy :oops:

My grandad says im laxidaisicle :lol: ahh well !
#32
13 years old at a swimming gala. The public seating was packed full. Hormones raging and a "petting" session with my girlfriend and then I was called for my race. Standing on the blocks in an excited state in a pair of speedos desperate for the start, is not a good look.
#33
I actually can't think of anything. I'm assuming that whatever has happened to me in life has been so traumatic that i've erased it from my memory.
#34
ADZ1478
13 years old at a swimming gala. The public seating was packed full. Hormones raging and a "petting" session with my girlfriend and then I was called for my race. Standing on the blocks in an excited state in a pair of speedos desperate for the start, is not a good look.


This has to be a wiener......sorry winner
#35
I guess I was about 7 or 8 and had to practise on the recorder. Got myself settled, set up the music and put the recorder in my mouth and as I started to blow, an earwig crawled out into my mouth. I can still remember the horrible feeling of it moving on my tongue and then spitting it out. eurrghhhh...
#36
vbnmu
:gift: tick tick tick

Awesome!!!

We got a winner!


Haha thanks
#37
found hotukdeals website:-D

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