Durex Embrace pleasure gels 99p in 99p stores
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Durex Embrace pleasure gels 99p in 99p stores

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Found 18th Nov 2015
Durex Embrace pleasure gels for 99p in 99p stores
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Haha awaiting the comments lol
What do you do? smear it on your eyes so you can't see your wifes mug?
malothehound

What do you do? smear it on your eyes so you can't see your wifes mug?



​And therein lies the pleasure
No put it on the door handle so she can't escape
Can I use this on a bus ?
jamesapple101

Can I use this on a bus ?



Sure.

Make sure the driver reverses it in gently though (_;)
Edited by: "Monkeybumcheeks" 18th Nov 2015
jamesapple101

Can I use this on a bus ?



Sure.

Smear some all over the exhaust and bang away to your hearts content X)
Is this better than shockwaves styling wax or loreal styling mousse???
markyboy82

Is this better than shockwaves styling wax or loreal styling mousse???



Yes, buy loads.
Great for stopping the squeak on your dyke
I mean Bike oO
Edited by: "Sharpharp" 18th Nov 2015
Sharpharp

Great for stopping the squeak on your dykeI mean Bike oO



I used a whole tube on my Mrs and it stopped her smoking.
My £200 chest drawer was ruined due to this 99p gel.

[img]adsoftheworld.com/sit…jpg?itok=emUEAXwO[/img]


Edited by: "alxdenisov" 18th Nov 2015
Maybe she smears it on hers!
malothehound

What do you do? smear it on your eyes so you can't see your wifes mug?



Or you could buy a dog and smear it on your groin. Just a thought.
Tee hee, sex. Tee hee, orgasm. Snigger.
g8spur

Tee hee, sex. Tee hee, orgasm. Snigger.



Don't worry son, you'll experience it one day
I recall my first time with a condom, I must have been 16.

I went in to buy a packet of condoms at the pharmacy. There was this beautiful assistant behind the counter, and she could see that I was new at it.

She handed me the package and asked if I knew how to wear one. I honestly answered, "No, this is my first time."

So she unwrapped the package, took one out and slipped it over her thumb. She cautioned me to make sure it was on tight and secure. I apparently still looked confused. So she looked all around the store to see if it was empty. It was empty.

"Just a minute." she said, and walked to the door, and locked it.

Taking my hand, she led me into the back room, unbuttoned her blouse and removed it. She unhooked her bra and laid it aside.
"Do these excite you?" she asked.

Well, I was so dumb-struck that all I could do was shake my head. She then said it was time to slip the condom on.

As I was slipping it on, she dropped her skirt, removed her knickers and sat down at a desk.
"Well, come on," she said, "we don't have much time."

So I climbed on her. It was so wonderful, that unfortunately, I could no longer hold back and KAPOW. I was done within a few minutes.

She looked at me with a bit of a frown, "Did you put that condom on?" she asked.

I said, "I sure did." and held up my thumb to show her.

She fainted.

thought I share the joke.
MalikT

I recall my first time with a condom, I must have been 16.I went in to … I recall my first time with a condom, I must have been 16.I went in to buy a packet of condoms at the pharmacy. There was this beautiful assistant behind the counter, and she could see that I was new at it.She handed me the package and asked if I knew how to wear one. I honestly answered, "No, this is my first time."So she unwrapped the package, took one out and slipped it over her thumb. She cautioned me to make sure it was on tight and secure. I apparently still looked confused. So she looked all around the store to see if it was empty. It was empty."Just a minute." she said, and walked to the door, and locked it.Taking my hand, she led me into the back room, unbuttoned her blouse and removed it. She unhooked her bra and laid it aside."Do these excite you?" she asked.Well, I was so dumb-struck that all I could do was shake my head. She then said it was time to slip the condom on.As I was slipping it on, she dropped her skirt, removed her knickers and sat down at a desk."Well, come on," she said, "we don't have much time."So I climbed on her. It was so wonderful, that unfortunately, I could no longer hold back and KAPOW. I was done within a few minutes.She looked at me with a bit of a frown, "Did you put that condom on?" she asked.I said, "I sure did." and held up my thumb to show her.She fainted.:p thought I share the joke.



All from the size of your thumb.

HUKD
This is a bargain price...

A lifetime supply!!! Thanks OP!
MalikT

I recall my first time with a condom, I must have been 16.I went in to … I recall my first time with a condom, I must have been 16.I went in to buy a packet of condoms at the pharmacy. There was this beautiful assistant behind the counter, and she could see that I was new at it.She handed me the package and asked if I knew how to wear one. I honestly answered, "No, this is my first time."So she unwrapped the package, took one out and slipped it over her thumb. She cautioned me to make sure it was on tight and secure. I apparently still looked confused. So she looked all around the store to see if it was empty. It was empty."Just a minute." she said, and walked to the door, and locked it.Taking my hand, she led me into the back room, unbuttoned her blouse and removed it. She unhooked her bra and laid it aside."Do these excite you?" she asked.Well, I was so dumb-struck that all I could do was shake my head. She then said it was time to slip the condom on.As I was slipping it on, she dropped her skirt, removed her knickers and sat down at a desk."Well, come on," she said, "we don't have much time."So I climbed on her. It was so wonderful, that unfortunately, I could no longer hold back and KAPOW. I was done within a few minutes.She looked at me with a bit of a frown, "Did you put that condom on?" she asked.I said, "I sure did." and held up my thumb to show her.She fainted.:p thought I share the joke.



​omg brilliant! Bloody loved it
That stuff is like putting vapour rub on your bits !!!!!!
beckiieevans

That stuff is like putting vapour rub on your bits !!!!!!


Why would you do that?
OMG, hot just for the comments
Heat added X) for the comments
Bargain this stuff retails for £15 on Lovehoney, not highly rated though
This stuff can burn a little, what's wrong with a good old fashioned bit of spit and polish
DominicPTS

Why would you do that?



Maybe it was blocked up lol
I always read the condom etc ones as I know I will get a good laugh from the comments haha
I got a free sample of something similar in a pack of condoms, it was called Tingle. I can assure you there was no tingle !!! It was like volcano lava. Had to dash to the shower to extinguish the flames. Needless to say nothing happened that evening as i smouldered in a very different way !
Volcanic Lava?? So the earth did move for you
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