2 NUNS

    2 NUNS

    There were two nuns..

    One of them was known as Sister Mathematical (SM),

    and the other one was known as Sister Logical (SL) .

    It is getting dark and they are still far away from the convent.

    SM: Have you noticed that a man has been following us for
    the past thirty-eight and a half minutes? I wonder what he wants.

    SL: Its logical. He wants to attack us.

    SM: Oh, no! At this rate he will reach us in 15 minutes
    at the most! What can we do?

    SL: The only logical thing to do of course is to walk faster.

    SM: Its not working.

    SL: Of course its not working. The man did the only
    logical thing. He started to walk faster, too.

    SM: So, what shall we do? At this rate he will reach us in one minute.

    SL: The only logical thing we can do is split. You go that way and Ill go this way. He cannot follow u s both.

    So the man decided to follow Sister Logical.

    Sister Mathematical arrives at the convent and is
    worried about what has happened to Sister Logical.

    Then Sister Logical arrives.

    SM: Sister Logical! Thank God you are here!
    Tell me what happened!

    SL: The only logical thing happened. The man couldnt follow us both, so he followed me

    SM: Yes, yes! But what happened then?

    SL: The only logical thing happened. I started to run
    as fast as I could and he started to run as fast as he could.

    SM: And?

    SL : The only logical thing happened. He reached me.

    SM : Oh, dear! What did you do?

    SL : The only logical thing to do. I lifted my dress up.

    SM : Oh, Sister! What did the man do?

    SL: The only logical thing to do. He pulled down his pants.

    SM: Oh, no! What happened then?

    SL : Isnt it logical, Sister? A nun with her dress up can run faster than a man with his pants down.

    And for those of you who thought it would be dirty,

    Say two Hail Marys!


    Original Poster



    Funny :thumbsup:

    Very Good LOL


    haha, nice twist.

    Original Poster

    [CENTER] young nun enters a convent, where she can only utter two words every ten years. After the first decade, she visits Mother Superior and says, "bed hard."

    Ten years later, she says, "food bad." After 30 years, she goes to the Mother Superior and says, "I quit."

    "I'm not surprised," says Mother Superior. "You've been complaining ever since you got here."[/CENTER]

    Original Poster a small parish in rural New England there lived a priest, and several nuns. One day, one of the older nuns was noticing that the rugs in the church were beginning to fray. She went to the priest and told him, "Father, I believe your rugs need to be replaced soon."

    The priest thanked her for bringing it to his attention, and told her that he thought that she had been there long enough to refer to church property as 'our' not 'your.'

    Several days later, the same nun noticed that the hedge needed to be trimmed. She again went to the priest and told him, "Father, I've noticed that your... I mean our hedge needs to be trimmed."

    The priest thanked her for again bringing something to his attention and this time asked her if she had seen his watch that had gone missing. She said she hadn't, but assured him she would look for it.

    A few days later the parish received word that the bishop would be coming for a visit. The entire parish was busy readying the church for the visit. On the day the bishop arrived, the same nun came down the front stairs yelling, "Father! Father! I found your watch!"

    The bishop said, "How wonderful my child. Where did you find it?"

    After saying hello to the bishop, the nun turned to the priest and said, "I found it under OUR bed."

    Original Poster man was brought to Mercy Hospital, and went in for coronary surgery. The operation went well, and as the groggy man regained consciousness, he was reassured by a Sister of Mercy waiting by his bed. "Mr. Smith, you're going to be just fine," the nun said while patting his hand. "We do have to know, however, how you intend to pay for your stay here. Are you covered by insurance?"

    "No, I'm not," the man whispered hoarsely.

    "Can you pay in cash?"

    "I'm afraid I can't, Sister."

    "Do you have any close relatives, then?"

    "Just my sister in New Mexico," the patient replied. "But she's a spinster nun."

    "Nuns are not spinsters, Mr. Smith," the nun replied. "They are married to God."

    "Okay," the man said with a smile. "Then send the bill to my brother-in-law."
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