Advice needed... should I cross this line???

53 replies
Found 29th Mar 2011
Hey peeps,

I'm in abit of a tricky situation here and would be greatful if you lovely HUKD'ers could give me your opinions and advice.

Right... I have just finished contracting for a company and I am now looking for a new F/T job. Ive been out of work for 3 weeks and would like to find something asap.

A friend of mine has recently set up his own business and is looking for a Junior Admin/PA part time (15hrs pw)

Knowing that I am out of work he has offered me the job (no interview required) The job is only part time and offering 1/5th of what I used to earn. Although the industry is completely different to what I do, I am seriously considering it based on the following...

1) Guaranteed job
2) My friend is quite happy for me to look for a full time job and leave should a F/T job in my industry come up
3) It's a relatively easy admin role
4) Potential to go full time if I enjoy it and if the job requires

However...

He had mentioned to me during the weekend how he wouldnt like to mix business with pleasure during general banter. Ive have also been close friends with him for around 25yrs. Is it really worth me taking the job knowing that these kind of situations can be awkward, proffesionally and socially?

Not quite sure what to do!

53 Comments

Banned

never cross the line...oh wait

Take it on the condition you both understand that if you dont get on you are free to walk away if things dont work out,becuase of personal conflicts.

keep away, a good friendship is worth more than a few weeks part time money...

Original Poster

whatsThePoint

never cross the line...oh wait



Loooooool.

Banned

If you dont take it you could be waiting a long time until something else comes along. you will be fine.

Depends how much you want to work. I'd take the job.

Original Poster

cis_groupie

Depends how much you want to work. I'd take the job.



Of course I want to work.. ideally asap, however I want to ensure Im doing the right thing and that it works for us both. Financially I'm Ok for now so now immediate rush. Quite happy to wait for the "right" position then job hop because Im not happy.

He gets somebody he knows and trusts, you get a few bob in your pocket. The ground rules seem fair so it looks like win win.

Take it! It's only part time, not like you're living together... might turn out to be a great move. You'll never know if you don't try. Plus, you'll still be looking for something else and prospective employers like people with a current employer reference.

Original Poster

melipona

He gets somebody he knows and trusts, you get a few bob in your pocket. … He gets somebody he knows and trusts, you get a few bob in your pocket. The ground rules seem fair so it looks like win win.



I don't think it would be too bad, but I want to think seriously about it as id hate to jeapordise 25yrs worth of friendship over what really is only a few bob as you put it.

Original Poster

Am i being overly cautious? i'm just abit reluctant because of what he said on Sunday when we out for dinner.

Miss Money Penny

Am i being overly cautious? i'm just abit reluctant because of what he … Am i being overly cautious? i'm just abit reluctant because of what he said on Sunday when we out for dinner.



At least you're both aware of what COULD happen, and are keen that it doesn't. He knows you're still looking for a f/t job, so just crack on and find one quick!

Banned

Miss Money Penny

Am i being overly cautious? i'm just abit reluctant because of what he … Am i being overly cautious? i'm just abit reluctant because of what he said on Sunday when we out for dinner.



What is the exact history, just friends or EX's? you seem to be making a fuss out of nothing.

It could cause problems if one of you wants a little bit more than a part-time job or employee... if you know what I mean.

Original Poster

.... did i forget to mention that his sister is also one of my close mates. Hence the potential of awkward situations with both, if they arised. Not saying the will. Could be great but im considering everything.

Original Poster

DangerGod

What is the exact history, just friends or EX's? you seem to be making a … What is the exact history, just friends or EX's? you seem to be making a fuss out of nothing.



No... just friends. Ive known him and his sister for 25yrs. Its not about making a fuss over nothing, im trying to be realistic and whey everything up before making a decision I may regret. Its a long friendship that could "potentially" be affected, thats why.

People have worked with friends before and have ended up losing alot because of this...... friendship is one of those things that is hard to find and easy to loose.

Another thing is if you have that job you dont have the same drive you would if you were unemployed. I know it stops you from twiddling your thumbs but certain jobs may pass you by because you didnt get your CV out in time etc....

I would graciously decline............ but it would be good to see what you look like in "office gear"

Banned

Your only going to be working 15 hours a week you say? You have been friends for 25 years now you dont want to be in the same room because you fear it will effect your friendship. Aslong as you keep things professional what is the problem? if he read this thread he would probably think WTF.

Sounds like your good friends and cant see it being a problem working for him , as long as you do the job properly and dont take any libertys ( turning up late, taking days off etc AKA skiving , lol ), because he's a friend !!. I would go for it tbh .
Edited by: "shopstilldrops" 29th Mar 2011

I'd say he can't be much of a friend in the first place if he thinks you working a few hours for him has to be on such strict terms.

Original Poster

Rupz

People have worked with friends before and have ended up losing alot … People have worked with friends before and have ended up losing alot because of this...... friendship is one of those things that is hard to find and easy to loose. Another thing is if you have that job you dont have the same drive you would if you were unemployed. I know it stops you from twiddling your thumbs but certain jobs may pass you by because you didnt get your CV out in time etc....I would graciously decline............ but it would be good to see what you look like in "office gear"



That is exactly why I wanted peoples general opinion...
Hmmm its not an easy one to consider at all oO

Take it, he will give you a good seeing too after hours when you become his P.A

Never work for Friends or Family something invariably goes wrong and problems arise. Not worth it, I know it is tempting but good friends are hard to find. That is only my opinion though.

Miss Money Penny

That is exactly why I wanted peoples general opinion... Hmmm its not an … That is exactly why I wanted peoples general opinion... Hmmm its not an easy one to consider at all oO




after reading that your friends with his sister make further complicates the situation. i think it is a very complex equation, one which even i would not be able to derive!

oh and if hes said to you " i dont mix business with pleasure" although it may have been said in jest i dout you will have much fun with him as your boss, seems like he wants to maintain a boss worker relationship.... and thats it!


Edited by: "Rupz" 29th Mar 2011

Numpty , you do know deek is about ?................he wont be happy . lol

Original Poster

DangerGod

Your only going to be working 15 hours a week you say? You have been … Your only going to be working 15 hours a week you say? You have been friends for 25 years now you dont want to be in the same room because you fear it will effect your friendship. Aslong as you keep things professional what is the problem? if he read this thread he would probably think WTF.



Not really, im just trying to consider everything. Its not like "never mix business with pleasure" saying is just a myth. I'm sure alot of people have had bad experiences. Im just trying to engage what the chances are like from peoples opinions and expereince.

skylinedude

Never work for Friends or Family something invariably goes wrong and … Never work for Friends or Family something invariably goes wrong and problems arise. Not worth it, I know it is tempting but good friends are hard to find. That is only my opinion though.



I couldnt work with my family because we all have our opinions and we feel we can express them more between outselves and im guessing seeing as though you both have known each other for such a long time its almost family. With that said you would speak to him differently then say other employees which woould not go down well with him and IF he was **** off one day and said something which you didnt like, you would take it personally, maybe even more than you normally would.

It depends I suppose on how easy it will be to find another job in your area - if you think you can get an alternative soonish then probably best not to take it, but if you're not going to find another job then it might be worth thinking about, even though you might lose a friend.
Some friends are priceless though.

Original Poster

numptyj

Take it, he will give you a good seeing too after hours when you become … Take it, he will give you a good seeing too after hours when you become his P.A



Looool, I can imagine the amount of jokes he will crack if I do take the job.

shopstilldrops

Numpty , you do know deek is about ?................he wont be happy . lol



Give me chance ffs!

Oi, numpty! Kerb it please!

as nice as the offer is the statement he made is oone that would site uncomfortably with me and with his sister in the mix too seems like a recipie for disaster............

talkin of recipies if there are any good cooks please feel free to post a recipie ........... woman also allowed lol hotukdeals.com/mis…796

vey sorry but thought just came to me

Banned

Good morning miss money penny....now bend over the desk as I want you to take something down.

If you really DO think your friendship could be at risk, you must decide for yourself what could put that at risk and do what you can to mitigate the chances of that happening.

If it is the chance of a relationship developing, then you must consider why it has not occured previously and whether that was a good or bad thing.

Original Poster

Rupz

as nice as the offer is the statement he made is oone that would site … as nice as the offer is the statement he made is oone that would site uncomfortably with me and with his sister in the mix too seems like a recipie for disaster............talkin of recipies if there are any good cooks please feel free to post a recipie ........... woman also allowed lolhttp://www.hotukdeals.com/misc/simple-tasty-recipes-dishes/908796vey sorry but thought just came to me



Stop hijacking my thread!

Miss Money Penny

Stop hijacking my thread!




just cos you cant cook lol ........... when am i coming round for dinner.......... lamb curry please (post recipie on my post lol )

Original Poster

slamdunkin

Good morning miss money penny....now bend over the desk as I want you to … Good morning miss money penny....now bend over the desk as I want you to take something down.



oO


........ lol X)




He had mentioned to me during the weekend how he wouldnt like to mix … He had mentioned to me during the weekend how he wouldnt like to mix business with pleasure during general banter

numptyj

Take it, he will give you a good seeing too after hours when you become … Take it, he will give you a good seeing too after hours when you become his P.A



seems like slighly mixed messages. Im sure it will all be fine though as long as you remain professional, at the end of the day you're there to work, have fun everynow and then but make sure you're getting the jobs that you need to complete done.

just out of curiosity is the potential employer indian?

Rupz

just out of curiosity is the potential employer indian?


Also out of curiousity, "Why?"

Original Poster

WoolyM

Also out of curiousity, "Why?"



Lol.. yup! I did make a promise to myself that id never work for an indian owned company again.
Being indian myself I know how they make u work work work for little to nothing. Hard work and little pay.
Post a comment
Avatar
@
    Text
    Top Discussions
    1. Advice on claiming from Salford Council pot hole damage22
    2. What is the best weight training app for iOS please?33
    3. heart rate monitor fitness watch59
    4. Best renewal with sky after last offer88

    See more discussions