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    advice re caring for someone

    I hope someone can give me some help about what i'm about to ask

    my mum is disabled and has had a carer for a while who is a family member but now that person can't do it anymore which has left me and me mum with a difficult situation

    I work 7 days a week so i can't be there for her and be her carer but she is fully dependant and we need someone to take over the carer;s allowance and help her out daily but i dunno how/if/where we can get help with this

    i'm her support after i finish work which is demanding as it is but i work ft during the week and pt saturday and sunday

    any advice besides look on direct.gov which i;ve done already would be great!

    its tough atm and we need someone to come in and make her a meal make a cuppa that kinda thing but its like looking for the invisible man!

    i reckon we;re screwed

    28 Comments

    Never been in that situation but would social services be able to help? Can they organise home help?

    Original Poster

    galareho;8161292

    Never been in that situation but would social services be able to help? … Never been in that situation but would social services be able to help? Can they organise home help?



    they have said they can short term but when they came in before the carer didn't arrive when they said they would and didn't do anything so really worried about the whole situation atm

    Despite recent press I am sure that Social Services will do a great job if you ask! You are not alone in this situation, just give them a ring. Good luck.

    Social services should be your first call.
    ]Crossroads may be of help.

    Is there any local care companies you can contact yourself to arrange a carer? Sorry, I don't really know what else to suggest. Hope you get some help asap!

    Can you put her in a care home? I've a friend who works in one, and although he only caters for the mentally handicapped, it seems like not too bad a life for the peoples, with more or less daily trips out, and plenty of one-to-one care. Could something long those lines be applicable?

    Banned

    Age concern have helped my gran.

    Good luck

    Original Poster

    dxx;8161375

    Can you put her in a care home? I've a friend who works in one, and … Can you put her in a care home? I've a friend who works in one, and although he only caters for the mentally handicapped, it seems like not too bad a life for the peoples, with more or less daily trips out, and plenty of one-to-one care. Could something long those lines be applicable?



    she won't go she has her own home and we can't afford anything like that we're on the bread line as it is

    thanks for the thoughts guys

    How did she pay for the support? was it via direct payments? if so she can advertise the job with social services. She could contact an agency to provide her with the help she needs. The are also private firms that will contract for the support that she needs.

    nitelighter;8161436

    she won't go she has her own home and we can't afford anything like that … she won't go she has her own home and we can't afford anything like that we're on the bread line as it isthanks for the thoughts guys



    I think it might be government-funded, to some extent at least. I'll speak to my mate tomorrow and ask what the deal with his place is, but afaik, the guys they look after are considered clients and it is run as a non-profit business, and I think it might be funded through housing benefits (they also provide accomodation, i think) and DLA. Possibly carers allowance, too. I'll see what I can find out though, and hopefully it won't cost you much if anything.

    Banned

    you can get a private carer in and pay by the hour not sure exactly how much but i think its around £15/20 ph

    patriciawhites.co.uk/

    Original Poster

    if its 20 quid an hour i'd do it myself waaaaaaay better than what i'm on now :-S

    the direct payment thing sounds good if the social services could provide her long term support could get a private company so they have to provide a good service or we could move for a few hours a day that would be excellent if we could and gonna rep each of you for making it seem slightly less scary

    you need to ring social services and request someone to come n see ya mum n do an assessment of needs,a care package will then be put together n the services of a care team weather council or private will be put in place,your other option is what is called direct payment,you advertise for a personal assistant and interview them yoursrlves and your local athourity will fund this money direct to you so that you can pay them.......hope this helps

    Spoke to my mate, he explains that for someone in your situation, the service should be entirely free. Check your rep for the name of and link to his company. He suggests you speak to your local social care department and to citizen's advice, and consult yell.co.uk to find similar companies operating in your local area. I know there's the thing about potentially having to move her out of her home to do it, but it seems like it might be possible, and it might be the easiest thing for the family overall.

    Original Poster

    lizbraham41;8161647

    you need to ring social services and request someone to come n see ya mum … you need to ring social services and request someone to come n see ya mum n do an assessment of needs,a care package will then be put together n the services of a care team weather council or private will be put in place,your other option is what is called direct payment,you advertise for a personal assistant and interview them yoursrlves and your local athourity will fund this money direct to you so that you can pay them.......hope this helps



    yeah we had an assesment before when the waters so to speak started getting murky they set something up but didn't tell us we could get other sources involved instead so might have a chit chat with mum and let her decide if she wants to speak to the lady that did it and ask about direct payments she led us to believe we weren't entitled to do that so might have to go carer's centre and see what they say about all whats going too

    everyone so far are awesome and will check in with CAB an all good idea!

    the overall majority of local authoritys now promote care in the community.it is much better all round if a person can remain in thier own homes with the support of a care team n most service users prefer this as it promotes thier independence,its all about enabeling now.

    I am going through this now with my dad am his full time cater mum works full time and I am going uni bit hard to explain on her as realli complex but if u wud like to pm me I cud give u my details and we can speak over phone I understand if u dnt wanna xxxx just let me no can speak tonight x if uwish x

    i am an iret carer for my local social services and have been for 20 years,if there is anything i can help with feel free to ask,hope you get some peace of mind love.

    Original Poster

    thanks everyone the response has been brilliant and i thank each of you in turn

    i did the caring when i was at school (well at home most o the time i shouldsay) so i know its demanding if i wasn't in debt and payin the mortgage i would do as i love my mum as do most daughters i reckon. i know the jobcentre are supporting the carers centres with help and stuff but i don't think carers get the credit they deserve from all avenues in society.

    thanks becy have replied to your message and liz will remember that and if i or mum thinks up anything re this i'll send you a message

    once again wanna thank you lot for at least puttin my mind at ease about what is out there and what to look for,

    Banned

    nitelighter;8161871

    thanks everyone the response has been brilliant and i thank each of you … thanks everyone the response has been brilliant and i thank each of you in turni did the caring when i was at school (well at home most o the time i shouldsay) so i know its demanding if i wasn't in debt and payin the mortgage i would do as i love my mum as do most daughters i reckon. i know the jobcentre are supporting the carers centres with help and stuff but i don't think carers get the credit they deserve from all avenues in society. thanks becy have replied to your message and liz will remember that and if i or mum thinks up anything re this i'll send you a messageonce again wanna thank you lot for at least puttin my mind at ease about what is out there and what to look for,



    Becky is really lovely and if you get her on the phone she will make your day with her lovely happy attitude.

    Take care of yourself x x

    Lmaooo ty dawnnnnn did ya enjoyy ya shopping x

    Banned

    xbecky07x;8161917

    Lmaooo ty dawnnnnn did ya enjoyy ya shopping x



    Yes, chicken.

    How long now until uni? x x

    like others have said social services should be able to provide homecare support, but you will need to contact them in order for them to set it up with the agencies they use.

    They may offer direct payments as most local authorities now will be looking more towards personal budgets and letting people buy their own care etc

    Banned

    nitelighter;8161634

    if its 20 quid an hour i'd do it myself waaaaaaay better than what i'm on … if its 20 quid an hour i'd do it myself waaaaaaay better than what i'm on now :-S the direct payment thing sounds good if the social services could provide her long term support could get a private company so they have to provide a good service or we could move for a few hours a day that would be excellent if we could and gonna rep each of you for making it seem slightly less scary



    thats roughly what the agency would charge im guessing as my gf did this for a while and was earning around £11 an hour slightly more for weekends and overnight......although they are quite picky for staff they employ a lot of foreign trained nurses like aussies, kiwis , saffas as it takes around 6 months to transfer and get registered to practice as nurses here

    you could probably advertise and find and vet 1 yourself......lots of backpackers trained in skills of use that can be utilized for a fraction of the price, if you know where to look

    DLM;8161934

    Yes, chicken.How long now until uni? x x




    I no 3 weeks today excatlyyy am realli excited but realli likeeeeee scareddd lmaoo x

    Banned

    xbecky07x;8164839

    I no 3 weeks today excatlyyy am realli excited but realli likeeeeee … I no 3 weeks today excatlyyy am realli excited but realli likeeeeee scareddd lmaoo x



    Aw, you will be fine x x

    Original Poster

    DLM your right she is awesome!! and gave me loads of advice on other caring related stuff too which i am having a look into atm

    i'm chuffed and am not freaking out now which is a bonus and mum is alot more relaxed waiting on the social worker to be re-assessed so the ball is in motion so to speak

    Banned

    nitelighter;8172291

    DLM your right she is awesome!! and gave me loads of advice on other … DLM your right she is awesome!! and gave me loads of advice on other caring related stuff too which i am having a look into atm i'm chuffed and am not freaking out now which is a bonus and mum is alot more relaxed waiting on the social worker to be re-assessed so the ball is in motion so to speak



    Aw great x x
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