Back to school: what's your views on your kids uniform and piercing rules ect?

156
Found 23rd Aug 2017
Ok so I have a near 15 year old teenage girl who has struggled with feeling part of anything in school. She's not in to skimpy clothes or trackers and trainers or impressing boys or anything like that. She's found her own personality and look rather then following the crowd. She has one piercing, her nose which she got done last year. Soon after this the school implemented a no piercing rule (Along with many other rules), So she wears a clear retainer which just looks like a little dot where the hole is.
Now the school has further stated that no piercing retainers can be worn either. I really can not believe the extremes of 'rules' they have going on. They want everybody to look the same, no individuality. Just robots. My daughter is quiet (and well behaved) at school and has found her way to feel like her own person rather then someone who feels the odd one out and invisible. I don't see why she can't wear a retainer, it looks exactly the same when there's no ring in. It infuriates me that there's teachers there that have makeup on that looks like a small child has drawn it on (literally blue eyeshadow up to the eyebrows etc) but the strict rules don't apply at all to them as the kids arnt allowed makeup, nail polish, hair dye, piercings etc... there's more that irritates me a lot about the school policies but I'm just soooo annoyed by the no retainer policy.
Anyway I would be interested to hear what all your views are on your kids / grand kids school policies.
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LeahsMintytoutou13 m ago

No I haven't approached any board of governers or anyone as yet. I …No I haven't approached any board of governers or anyone as yet. I wouldn't know where to begin. I'm not very confident in knowing the correct way to address this. I know many people are annoyed by how strict their rules are and have heard some parents have actually moved their child to a different school because they are imposing these rules and the education is going down hill there too so their strict rules arnt improving anything, they are just getting the kids more isolations and lunch times taken away.


Sorry but I am going to add a bit more balance to your argument. There are also parents out there who believe the rules should be followed and in fact schools at times take a more lenient approach with issues then they should. Also your reference to 'robots'? Don't be silly. I can't account for teachers unable to apply makeup correctly but they do not necessarily follow the same rules as pupils. They are not equals and nor should they be either. However teachers were once pupils and did follow the school rules. The fact that you are writing words such as 'infuriates you' are symbolic of today's society. Are you not concerned about the new curriculum changes and the effect this will have on pupils? Are you not concerned of the lack of teacher posts been filled in this country? I hope you are concerned about more important issues in education than whether your daughter can wear a retainer or not to school.
Why not take them to court like that selfish parent Jon Platt did and run up huge legal expenses at the tax payers cost if it makes you feel better?

Or just stop whining.
Rules are rules and are imposed for a reason. What do you suggest the best thing todo?

A, Teach her the correct thing to do and obey the rule an take it out.

or

B, Teach her its ok to break the rule, become a target at school and a issue.

What does it matter if a teacher wants to wear blue eye shadow, Is that effecting her education?
LeahsMintytoutou31 m ago

No need for the aggression lets all conform ey


But parents are that dense and that self-entitled that their children can wear whatever they like at school because the rules don't apply to them and their little snowflakes.
Two weeks from now comes the "sad face photo" in The Sun, with the caption "Little Beyonce, 13, sent home for having bright pink hair and flashing trainers" scummy mummy, 24, sat there with a sad face blaming the school because the school only sent 15 letters telling them that the school uniform policy is just that a policy and not a free vote!
157 Comments
Failing all else, have you approached your TPA and then board of governors? A method is to channel your infuriation to contributory efforts in your TPA, like doing fund raising and events for the TPA, then people appreciate your group efforts for the general well-being of the school and then suddenly your collective voice feels weighty. Then get one of yourselves as parent governors to add even more weight. It is all about respect and mutual confidence for the betterment of the school.
splender13 m ago

Failing all else, have you approached your TPA and then board of …Failing all else, have you approached your TPA and then board of governors? A method is to channel your infuriation to contributory efforts in your TPA, like doing fund raising and events for the TPA, then people appreciate your group efforts for the general well-being of the school and then suddenly your collective voice feels weighty. Then get one of yourselves as parent governors to add even more weight. It is all about respect and mutual confidence for the betterment of the school.


No I haven't approached any board of governers or anyone as yet. I wouldn't know where to begin. I'm not very confident in knowing the correct way to address this. I know many people are annoyed by how strict their rules are and have heard some parents have actually moved their child to a different school because they are imposing these rules and the education is going down hill there too so their strict rules arnt improving anything, they are just getting the kids more isolations and lunch times taken away. As I say I don't quite know what to do about it yet and I wondered what others have done with regards to to similar circumstances.. Thanks for your advice
Edited by: "LeahsMintytoutou" 23rd Aug 2017
Rules are rules and are imposed for a reason. What do you suggest the best thing todo?

A, Teach her the correct thing to do and obey the rule an take it out.

or

B, Teach her its ok to break the rule, become a target at school and a issue.

What does it matter if a teacher wants to wear blue eye shadow, Is that effecting her education?
ThugBasher9 m ago

Rules are rules and are imposed for a reason. What do you suggest the best …Rules are rules and are imposed for a reason. What do you suggest the best thing todo?A, Teach her the correct thing to do and obey the rule an take it out.orB, Teach her its ok to break the rule, become a target at school and a issue. What does it matter if a teacher wants to wear blue eye shadow, Is that effecting her education?


Is it affecting my daughters education to have a clear retainer in? I'm not saying she should still have her ring in (although it didn't affect me and plenty others at school) I'm just saying why can't she have a clear retainer?
The teachers appearence is her own business, just like my daughters is!But they should set an example if they force the teenagers to abide by such strict rules. She wears the correct uniform is well behaved and does well in exams and lessons.
LeahsMintytoutou13 m ago

No I haven't approached any board of governers or anyone as yet. I …No I haven't approached any board of governers or anyone as yet. I wouldn't know where to begin. I'm not very confident in knowing the correct way to address this. I know many people are annoyed by how strict their rules are and have heard some parents have actually moved their child to a different school because they are imposing these rules and the education is going down hill there too so their strict rules arnt improving anything, they are just getting the kids more isolations and lunch times taken away.


Sorry but I am going to add a bit more balance to your argument. There are also parents out there who believe the rules should be followed and in fact schools at times take a more lenient approach with issues then they should. Also your reference to 'robots'? Don't be silly. I can't account for teachers unable to apply makeup correctly but they do not necessarily follow the same rules as pupils. They are not equals and nor should they be either. However teachers were once pupils and did follow the school rules. The fact that you are writing words such as 'infuriates you' are symbolic of today's society. Are you not concerned about the new curriculum changes and the effect this will have on pupils? Are you not concerned of the lack of teacher posts been filled in this country? I hope you are concerned about more important issues in education than whether your daughter can wear a retainer or not to school.
ThugBasher16 m ago

Rules are rules and are imposed for a reason. What do you suggest the best …Rules are rules and are imposed for a reason. What do you suggest the best thing todo?A, Teach her the correct thing to do and obey the rule an take it out.orB, Teach her its ok to break the rule, become a target at school and a issue. What does it matter if a teacher wants to wear blue eye shadow, Is that effecting her education?


Challenging the status quo isn't always a bad thing.
Why not take them to court like that selfish parent Jon Platt did and run up huge legal expenses at the tax payers cost if it makes you feel better?

Or just stop whining.
THE RULES ARE WHATEVER THE SCHOOL MAKES THEM, DON'T LIKE IT GO ELSEWHERE!
Graham19797 m ago

THE RULES ARE WHATEVER THE SCHOOL MAKES THEM, DON'T LIKE IT GO ELSEWHERE!



There's a long understood rule about not typing in CAPS online?
Is it that much hassle to remove during school hours?

As whorlow mentioned you have bigger things to worry about your child's education, even more so if you live in Scotland.
Hopefully they'll teach her how to write 'etc' correctly...
dealpickle7 m ago

Hopefully they'll teach her how to write 'etc' correctly...


Sorry I have dyslexia. So sometimes my letters get a little mixed up. I have taken many voluntary courses to try to get past this, I think I've done rather well. Thanks for your input
Graham197929 m ago

THE RULES ARE WHATEVER THE SCHOOL MAKES THEM, DON'T LIKE IT GO ELSEWHERE!


No need for the aggression lets all conform ey
Edited by: "LeahsMintytoutou" 23rd Aug 2017
Don't dress like a thot, and that's about it. Anything else is fine.

Any school imposing strict rules such as no peircings is just stupid. We had a rule at school where you could wear just a small stud but no rings or anything big and flashy.
LeahsMintytoutou6 m ago

No need for the aggression lets all conform ey



I think his cap lock key is broken.
DKLS22 m ago

Is it that much hassle to remove during school hours?As whorlow mentioned …Is it that much hassle to remove during school hours?As whorlow mentioned you have bigger things to worry about your child's education, even more so if you live in Scotland.




I don't live in Scotland. The school didn't have these rules before, they have just implemented them. Of corse there are other things to worry about re education. There are other things to worry about in the world too.. doesn't mean simple small things can't annoy you aswell.
I'm all for kids having rules and boundaries, maybe teenagers don't need the same boundaries as a year 7 pupil?
whorlow50 m ago

Sorry but I am going to add a bit more balance to your argument. There are …Sorry but I am going to add a bit more balance to your argument. There are also parents out there who believe the rules should be followed and in fact schools at times take a more lenient approach with issues then they should. Also your reference to 'robots'? Don't be silly. I can't account for teachers unable to apply makeup correctly but they do not necessarily follow the same rules as pupils. They are not equals and nor should they be either. However teachers were once pupils and did follow the school rules. The fact that you are writing words such as 'infuriates you' are symbolic of today's society. Are you not concerned about the new curriculum changes and the effect this will have on pupils? Are you not concerned of the lack of teacher posts been filled in this country? I hope you are concerned about more important issues in education than whether your daughter can wear a retainer or not to school.

DKLS24 m ago

Is it that much hassle to remove during school hours?As whorlow mentioned …Is it that much hassle to remove during school hours?As whorlow mentioned you have bigger things to worry about your child's education, even more so if you live in Scotland.


What is the issue in Scotland? I don't have kids but I do have a younger sibling in a Scottish school.
LeahsMintytoutou3 m ago

I don't live in Scotland. The school didn't have these rules before, they …I don't live in Scotland. The school didn't have these rules before, they have just implemented them. Of corse there are other things to worry about re education. There are other things to worry about in the world too.. doesn't mean simple small things can't annoy you aswell. I'm all for kids having rules and boundaries, maybe teenagers don't need the same boundaries as a year 7 pupil?



You are just being selfish for questioning things. Just conform and do as you or told etc
Don't like it, move her to a school with different rules. Don't waste the school's time. They've got more important things to do than waste it justifying their dress code to you.

Just got flame deer lol
danfr2 m ago

Don't like it, move her to a school with different rules. Don't waste the …Don't like it, move her to a school with different rules. Don't waste the school's time. They've got more important things to do than waste it justifying their dress code to you.Just got flame deer lol



They seem to have time to waste adding new rules though.
CoeK16 m ago

What is the issue in Scotland? I don't have kids but I do have a younger …What is the issue in Scotland? I don't have kids but I do have a younger sibling in a Scottish school.


Excluding the many issues in Scottish HE, Have a look into the Curriculum for Excellence issue, Scotland decided to reform its education system and used this system, despite the system failing when its been used in a number of countries.


tes.com/new…red
bbc.co.uk/new…729
bbc.co.uk/new…835
Bure1125 m ago

Don't dress like a thot, and that's about it. Anything else is fine.Any …Don't dress like a thot, and that's about it. Anything else is fine.Any school imposing strict rules such as no peircings is just stupid. We had a rule at school where you could wear just a small stud but no rings or anything big and flashy.




Haha Thankyou. I understand they need rules but I think they are going overboard. Making kids hate being at school is not the way forward in my view. Don't get me wrong it shouldn't be fun and games all the time and there should be consequences to bad behaviour. But when people are fighting or bullying and getting the same punishment as some who wore a nose stud or put abit of colour in their hair, it's not right. I'm shocked at some of the responses on here to be honest. I thought it was quite obvious I was stating why can't they wear a retainer. I'm not even saying they should be able to wear whatever piercings they want,. When I was at school we were allowed whatever we wanted apart from in PE we had to take them out. I can not remember one incident stemming from having a piercing.
ThugBasher1 h, 25 m ago

Rules are rules and are imposed for a reason. What do you suggest the best …Rules are rules and are imposed for a reason. What do you suggest the best thing todo?A, Teach her the correct thing to do and obey the rule an take it out.orB, Teach her its ok to break the rule, become a target at school and a issue. What does it matter if a teacher wants to wear blue eye shadow, Is that effecting her education?


If she got the piercing before the rule came in, should she have to suffer having a closed up scar on her face that will need to be re-pierced later on? Possibly causing problems with the scar, because someone in authority changed their mind.

Not being able to wear a retainer I think is going too far in that case. The hole/scar won't disappear if she takes the retainer out.
Edited by: "MSK." 23rd Aug 2017
danfr10 m ago

Don't like it, move her to a school with different rules. Don't waste the …Don't like it, move her to a school with different rules. Don't waste the school's time. They've got more important things to do than waste it justifying their dress code to you.Just got flame deer lol


Well done on your flame deer
I'm pretty sure the school don't see it like you. If you don't like it lump it! Medieval or what
DKLS4 m ago

Excluding the many issues in Scottish HE, Have a look into the Curriculum …Excluding the many issues in Scottish HE, Have a look into the Curriculum for Excellence issue, Scotland decided to reform its education system and used this system, despite the system failing when its been used in a number of countries.https://www.tes.com/news/school-news/breaking-views/new-curriculum-leaves-many-pupils-boredhttp://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-scotland-politics-38207729http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-35101835



Who knew, never heard of any issues. My brother just done Nat 5's I think, he seemed to do alright but he isn't exactly forthcoming with school talk
LeahsMintytoutou31 m ago

No need for the aggression lets all conform ey


But parents are that dense and that self-entitled that their children can wear whatever they like at school because the rules don't apply to them and their little snowflakes.
Two weeks from now comes the "sad face photo" in The Sun, with the caption "Little Beyonce, 13, sent home for having bright pink hair and flashing trainers" scummy mummy, 24, sat there with a sad face blaming the school because the school only sent 15 letters telling them that the school uniform policy is just that a policy and not a free vote!
ThugBasher1 h, 27 m ago

Rules are rules and are imposed for a reason. What do you suggest the best …Rules are rules and are imposed for a reason. What do you suggest the best thing todo?A, Teach her the correct thing to do and obey the rule an take it out.orB, Teach her its ok to break the rule, become a target at school and a issue. What does it matter if a teacher wants to wear blue eye shadow, Is that effecting her education?


She hasn't suggested breaking any rules though. She's asking about the best way to approach the issue.

And it's ok to question rules, isn't it?
Rom54 m ago

There's a long understood rule about not typing in CAPS online?


You probably use chat rooms more than I do.
deeky2 m ago

She hasn't suggested breaking any rules though. She's asking about the …She hasn't suggested breaking any rules though. She's asking about the best way to approach the issue.And it's ok to question rules, isn't it?



Apparently not. Don't like the rules then the only real option is to move your kid to another school away from all her friends etc, that will do wonders for her.

Can't find another school that has rules you like? Move to another part of the country, sell your house, leave your job etc.

Can't find another school in the country with rules you like? Move to another country, learn a new language, make new friends etc.

All for a piercing...
got to keep churning out those robots off the education conveyor belt, get them ready for that minimum wage slave job, or a lifetime of debt gaining that pointless degree that isn't worth anything, yes master, no master, three bags full master, how high would you like me to jump master.

because lets be honest, that's about as good as it will be for the majority of people degree or not.
Edited by: "eset12345" 23rd Aug 2017
Why are we all of a sudden talking about OP as if she is getting ready to call the Sun while watching Jeremy Kyle on her 75" TV paid for by taxpayers?
usually on stuff like this I would say, rules are rules, if you don't like it, go to a different school. However, she already had the retainer in last year, and she can't 'undo' the piercing so I think she should be allowed to keep it as it was allowed last year and she already had it done. If it was that she needed to wear a blue skirt instead of a black one, I would be with the school on it, but not something like this.
Graham197930 m ago

But parents are that dense and that self-entitled that their children can …But parents are that dense and that self-entitled that their children can wear whatever they like at school because the rules don't apply to them and their little snowflakes.Two weeks from now comes the "sad face photo" in The Sun, with the caption "Little Beyonce, 13, sent home for having bright pink hair and flashing trainers" scummy mummy, 24, sat there with a sad face blaming the school because the school only sent 15 letters telling them that the school uniform policy is just that a policy and not a free vote!


Did you even read my post???? I clearly stated I agree with consequences to bad behaviour and my daughter wears the correct uniform ect.. Which, by the way includes getting her to model her school trousers for a teacher to Say they arnt too tight, then they iron on a school logo transfer only after the child has modelled them and they even charge us 50p per transfer even though they are making them wear them. That's only 50p but the cost is not the point. It's all too much. I've not stated all the rules they have made but the list does go on. Half of which I do agree with might I add. You do not know me or my child. So please don't compare me to some scanky chav that doesn't care about my daughter education. That is not the case and you are a moron if you think everybody that has a different opinion to you is some crappy parent.
LeahsMintytoutou4 m ago

Did you even read my post???? I clearly stated I agree with consequences …Did you even read my post???? I clearly stated I agree with consequences to bad behaviour and my daughter wears the correct uniform ect.. Which, by the way includes getting her to model her school trousers for a teacher to Say they arnt too tight, then they iron on a school logo transfer only after the child has modelled them and they even charge us 50p per transfer even though they are making them wear them. That's only 50p but the cost is not the point. It's all too much. I've not stated all the rules they have made but the list does go on. Half of which I do agree with might I add. You do not know me or my child. So please don't compare me to some scanky chav that doesn't care about my daughter education. That is not the case and you are a moron if you think everybody that has a different opinion to you is some crappy parent.



You are wasting your time here. He doesn't have a problem with you as much as the caricature he has formed in his head of anyone who dares to question things.
CoeK37 m ago

Who knew, never heard of any issues. My brother just done Nat 5's I …Who knew, never heard of any issues. My brother just done Nat 5's I think, he seemed to do alright but he isn't exactly forthcoming with school talk


Thats the problem with messing round with education, you don't really see the true impact for 5-10 years down the line, when they either hit the workplace or higher ed.
DKLS1 m ago

Thats the problem with messing round with education, you don't really see …Thats the problem with messing round with education, you don't really see the true impact for 5-10 years down the line, when they either hit the workplace or higher ed.



Well I will wait for the true impact before I make my judgement. I might even have kids by then if my other half keeps on about it. Little pains
In general I'm all for schools having strict rules and standards and for all the kids to abide by them . However in this case I do have a little sympathy, neither of my children's schools would have allowed a nose piercing in the first place , but as your daughters did I feel they have to have a little give and take now. If your daughter wants to keep the piercing then I would send a quick email to her pastoral support teacher and explain the situation, stating that's because of the nature of a nose piercing it could close up during the day and cause scar tissue to form and request they reconsider allowing retainers for existing piercings only.

My sons school decided to introduce a uniform half way through sixth form when previously sixth form had been able to wear their own clothes. From my point of view it wasn't an issue but after one of my sons friends explained that it was going to be a huge financial burden that his mum couldn't afford , I emailed the head of sixth form to suggest they implemented the policy for the next year to allow parents time to plan for the cost. A compromised was reached whereby any parent needing assistance in upper sixth could have the costs covered by the school, as they would only be using the clothes for a few months. My point being that talking to the school could get you a positive result.
Edited by: "tinkerbellian" 23rd Aug 2017
Graham19799 m ago

Skank and You're



If you are going to pick out grammar and spelling at least get it right. You're and you are can both be used, you're is a contraction of you are.
Graham197912 m ago

Skank and You're


I take it you missed that I have dyslexia? Or maybe you truely are a horrible person
31764845-1LWGJ.jpg
Anyway I would be interested to hear what all your views are on your kids / grand kids school policies

So you ask for opinions, get one you don't agree with and complain.


The school rules are made by the board of governors and are in the best interests of the child (as they see it).


I see you complain about the teachers and their make-up. Here's a thought for you, the children and the staff are NOT equal. For the staff the school is their working environment and rules set and yes your child will have to follow rules as the staff do. Your compliant there is that the staff can don one thing but my child has to do something else? Your insult towards the staff is both petty and I think speaks volumes about you.


They want everybody to look the same, no individuality. Just robots.
Is that a genuine response, no my little buttercup they want all the children to arrive wearing the same clothing so that no child is left out, the child who is isn't wearing the latest iPhone trainers or whatever is not bullied. Maybe the police could just walk round wearing what they like or Firefighters could wear shorts and string vests.


My daughter is quiet (and well behaved) at school and has found her way to feel like her own person rather then someone who feels the odd one out and invisible
By telling her she has the right to wear a retainer when the school rules say no then you're making her the odd one out. As far as invisible you mean she looks the same as everybody else?


there's more that irritates me a lot about the school policies but I'm just soooo annoyed by the no retainer policy.

So make an appointment with the governors, not the head and argue your case, the head will have designed the policy based on the success of strict rules at other schools (or the academy, i suspect it will be an academy) , the governors will back him/her if you complain to him, go to them direct and make your case. Simple solution abide by the very simple and basic rules, forget your non-existent self-entitlement and go to another school.
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