Don't have me on no long tings.

    I have a friend who never fails having me running around on some wild goose chase.

    A 1 stop car ride ends up in an episode of epic proportions.

    Hear's my story...


    Original Poster

    Yesterday he called me because he wanted me to go with him and fetch a sofa that one of his friends was giving away.
    I told him that I could do it after work, but "Don't have me on no long tings".

    He said "No", he just needs to fetch it, and take it to his mum's house, and he will give me £15 for petrol and my time.
    Only... He doesn't have any money until tomorrow.

    I finished work at 5.30pm, went home and phoned him and told him that I would pick him up at 7pm, as I had to wait for my son to come in.

    Fast forward to 6.55pm, my phone rings. I see his number, and say:

    Me: Hi.
    Him: saint(not my real name) you never gonna guess what happened.
    Me: (Sigh) What.
    Him: I was in the shower and my electric ran out.
    Me: Yeah? (Wondering wtf he's telling me for).
    Him: Yeah, I thought I had enough to last me until tomorrow.
    Me: Okay...
    Him: You couldn't do me a favour could you, and lend me a tenner until tomorrow.
    Me: Yeah okay, no problem, I will be there in 15 mins.

    I went around there, and he took about 5 minutes to come downstairs.

    I asked him where we need to go and fetch the electric cards from, he said that we can pick it up from the Co-op on the way to get the sofa. I thought "That's okay".

    Picked up the electric cards, and then went to get the sofa.

    Got to his friends flat, and he looks at the buzzers, after a few seconds, I say "Which one does he live at". My friend says "I don't know, I think it;'s number 1".
    By now, I am ready to let off on this fool, I specifically told him "Don't have me on no long tings".

    He presses number 1, and luckily, it was the right one. His friend buzzes us in, we walk to his door, and he pops his head out to say "Wait 5 minutes, I was in the shower".

    He then makes us wait in the corridor with those lights that only stay on for 30 seconds before you need to switch them back on again. I am standing there thinking "Man! Every time he has me on some long tings".

    His friend eventually opens the door and lets us in. I won't go into detail, but this sofa took half an hour to get out the door, all the time I am thinking " Boy, he's got me on some long ting".

    We drive to his house so he can put in his electric card, this takes another 5 minutes. Why? No idea.

    We take the sofa to his mums house, no drama, through the door like a lubricated sausage in a moist watermelon.

    He says "Thanks saint", I will bell you tomorrow morning to give you your £25.

    This morning.. no call, this call.

    This evening at 6pm, he calls.

    Him: I have that money for you.
    Me: Yeah, thanks.
    Him: Are you going to pass around, or shall I run it up there.
    Me: I just got in from work, so, could you drop it around?
    Him: Yeah, I borrowed it(the money), so I should bring it really. I did pass around there not long ago, but you weren't in.
    Me: Yeah, I just got in. You should've put it through the letterbox.
    Him: Naah, someone might have saw me, they would wonder what I was doing.
    Me: They would have thought that you were putting something through the letterbox?
    Him: Yeah, but they might have come after and had a look and got a stick and a piece of gum and fished it out again.

    By now I am thinking "You what? are you on crack, meths, Speed. WTF you on about son!!". Who has this ever happened to! Come on now!

    Me: Well, I suppose so.
    Him: I wasn't really going to come your way, because I want to catch the number 14 into town, but I will, then I will have to get the bus at the end of your street, but there isn't a timetable, so I could be there for ages".
    Me: Silent.
    Him: Okay, I will run around now.

    At 7.45pm he turns up.


    Original Poster


    ...Watching Chris Rock on Channel 4

    damn. i lold

    aww that sucks actually!

    shoot him

    Saint, give me my fifteen minutes back man, :x making me read that long ting, man.

    man that story was long ting!

    Funny though

    ahah epic

    i lol'd

    black gerbil1;3600688

    ahah epici lol'd

    Why lol?

    You owe him £25.

    Well, you owe yourself £25, technically.

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