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    ex boyfriend refusing to give my stuff back!!!

    ok so me and my ex split up 3 weeks ago, it wasn't a nasty split and we were only together a couple of months but now he's refusing to give me back all the stuff that he borrowed from me
    he lives about 20 minutes outside my town and keeps giving me he excuse "i've been to busy" yet i've bumped into him mooching around town a couple of times since the split when he could of quite easily bought my things round then (i only live a few minutes drive outside of town) each time he look very embarrassed and mumbled about "being busy" grrrrrr
    he's got about £50 worth of my dvd's and c'ds and being a single mum that's quite alot of moneys worth for me.
    the question i wanted to ask was is it technically theft to deliberately hold onto someone elses property and not have any intention of returning them, tis doing my head in at the mo!

    85 Comments

    cant you go knock on his door and ask for em?

    Break into his house and leave a boiling bunny on the stove, he should get the message.

    (if that's the both of you in your avi then you need to change it!)

    clearly he isnt taking the split very well.

    Original Poster

    i would do but he lives in the sticks and i can't drive
    he asked to borrow this stuff and being a kind hearted soul i always said yes, gonna be a long time before i lend anyone else anything again!

    Original Poster

    Carley;6964508

    Break into his house and leave a boiling bunny on the stove, he should … Break into his house and leave a boiling bunny on the stove, he should get the message.(if that's the both of you in your avi then you need to change it!)



    lol no! that's my best mate with me in my piccy!

    missp27;6964523

    lol no! that's my best mate with me in my piccy!



    does he drive? get him to go with you to get your stuff?

    Original Poster

    Carley;6964529

    does he drive? get him to go with you to get your stuff?


    that's a good idea, he's on his hols for another week so if i have no joy by then i might have to do that

    Carley;6964529

    does he drive? get him to go with you to get your stuff?



    yeh i'd find someone who drives and collect it....or call him and tell him if he doesnt return it your dad/big bro/etc will collect for you?

    Banned

    its not theft and techinically unless you can prove they are yours, he can keep them I believe.

    Original Poster

    csiman;6964560

    its not theft and techinically unless you can prove they are yours, he … its not theft and techinically unless you can prove they are yours, he can keep them I believe.


    :x

    but they're not his! :x

    Banned

    missp27;6964575

    :xbut they're not his! :x


    so? its your word against his I'm afraid.

    You should have got the gear back before you broke his heart

    Original Poster

    pinkleponkle;6964678

    You should have got the gear back before you broke his heart


    i didn't break his heart, we weren't together long enough for that!

    we had something like this happen to a friend back in the summer.

    maybe not the right way to do it, but a crowd of us went with her to his house - and sat outside in our cars till he opened the door, then we all piled up to his door. He let her in to get her stuff

    get your friends to go with you.

    missp27;6964717

    i didn't break his heart, we weren't together long enough for that!



    Seems he was more into it than what you were. :oops:

    missp27;6964717

    i didn't break his heart, we weren't together long enough for that!


    If that was true he wouldnt be lieing about "being busy" and would quite happily give you your stuff back. He is clearly taking this alot worse than you think, 3 weeks or not.

    Original Poster

    scott1295;6964731

    Seems he was more into it than what you were. :oops:


    it's ridiculous we didn't even have an argument when i ended it but he's even blocked me from his facebook, lol, which is a bit over dramatic, he was just so irratating i just couldn't stand it anymore :oops:

    missp27;6964754

    it's ridiculous we didn't even have an argument when i ended it but he's … it's ridiculous we didn't even have an argument when i ended it but he's even blocked me from his facebook, lol, which is a bit over dramatic, he was just so irratating i just couldn't stand it anymore :oops:



    Don't underestimate how upsetting being dumped can be. It's obvious to us that he's taking it hard,
    Just leave him alone with his dvd's and cd's, I mean how important can they be?

    Original Poster

    deek72;6964827

    Don't underestimate how upsetting being dumped can be. It's obvious to us … Don't underestimate how upsetting being dumped can be. It's obvious to us that he's taking it hard,Just leave him alone with his dvd's and cd's, I mean how important can they be?


    i wouldn't mind so much but i'ts10 dvd's and my 2 favourite albums, i can't afford to replace them all

    errrr go to house and get them?

    Banned

    missp27;6964846

    i wouldn't mind so much but i'ts10 dvd's and my 2 favourite albums, i … i wouldn't mind so much but i'ts10 dvd's and my 2 favourite albums, i can't afford to replace them all


    is that a picture of the two of you in your avatar?

    Original Poster

    csiman;6964879

    is that a picture of the two of you in your avatar?


    no that's me and my best mate in the picture

    Original Poster

    black gerbil1;6964863

    errrr go to house and get them?


    have you read the entire thread? he lives in the sticks about 20 mins drive away and i can't drive

    missp27;6964898

    have you read the entire thread? he lives in the sticks about 20 mins … have you read the entire thread? he lives in the sticks about 20 mins drive away and i can't drive



    Just ignore the imbecile.

    Check your pms.

    He's got Cd's etc, how does you not having £50 worth of them have any baring on your life?

    Call the Police and ask them if you don't like the advice given.
    I think you know what they'll say.

    As far as I'm aware the other responses in the thread are unfortunately correct, it's not theft and the police will be unlikely to get involved as they'll label it a civil matter. Unfortunately I can't remember the conclusion to the thread where another person was having almost the same reason, do you have any friends with cars that could give you a run over to the house (and give you a bit of backup) at time you know your ex is likely to be in?

    John

    Banned

    thesaint;6964944

    He's got Cd's etc, how does you not having £50 worth of them have any … He's got Cd's etc, how does you not having £50 worth of them have any baring on your life?Call the Police and ask them if you don't like the advice given.I think you know what they'll say.


    Wow - As helpful as ever :giggle:

    missp27;6964898

    have you read the entire thread? he lives in the sticks about 20 mins … have you read the entire thread? he lives in the sticks about 20 mins drive away and i can't drive


    oh well I guess its impossible to get someone to drive you there or catch a bus. Because when I never had a car i never went as far as 20mins from were i lived.

    black gerbil1;6965067

    oh well I guess its impossible to get someone to drive you there or catch … oh well I guess its impossible to get someone to drive you there or catch a bus. Because when I never had a car i never went as far as 20mins from were i lived.



    What sort of car do you have ?:whistling:

    Original Poster

    black gerbil1;6965067

    oh well I guess its impossible to get someone to drive you there or catch … oh well I guess its impossible to get someone to drive you there or catch a bus. Because when I never had a car i never went as far as 20mins from were i lived.


    well considering he lives in the middle of no where as i've said already there arent many buses there (1 every couple of hours) it's not a very practical idea

    black gerbil1;6965067

    oh well I guess its impossible to get someone to drive you there or catch … oh well I guess its impossible to get someone to drive you there or catch a bus. Because when I never had a car i never went as far as 20mins from were i lived.



    the one thing youve said that i agree with

    missp27;6965152

    well considering he lives in the middle of no where as i've said already … well considering he lives in the middle of no where as i've said already there arent many buses there (1 every couple of hours) it's not a very practical idea



    If you time it right, you won't have to wait for two hours, just get there 10 minutes before the bus is due.

    either cut your losses ( least you're out of the relationship and still alive ! )

    or call the police and lay it on thick... you wont be safe unless they come along with you, see if you can get an accompaniment.

    Honestly, sounds like the ex-bf doesnt want to pop round and see you.. certainly not to bring your stuff back.

    It isn't his priority to make you happy, tells me you're best off out of this, so congratulations xx

    He may suddenly feel some priority if you turn up with a couple of burly best friends saying ... return her stuff.... please

    ClarityofMind;6965174

    either cut your losses ( least you're out of the relationship and still … either cut your losses ( least you're out of the relationship and still alive ! )or call the police and lay it on thick... you wont be safe unless they come along with you, see if you can get an accompaniment.



    She didn't mention him being violent.
    What a waste of Police time. "Laying it on thick" or lying as it is known, is not the way to deal with situations like this!

    I find it hard to believe that only your best friend can drive you there. It's not really up to the ex to hand deliver the stuff back considering you dumped him. Yes he's being petty, but there you go dumpees can be petty sometimes. If you want the stuff back bad enough you will find a way to get to his house.

    ClarityofMind;6965174

    or call the police and lay it on thick... you wont be safe unless they … or call the police and lay it on thick... you wont be safe unless they come along with you, see if you can get an accompaniment.



    :? :?

    For a few cds?

    Just be glad your ending it , if he's this childish he was never worth your time.

    thesaint;6965190

    She didn't mention him being violent.What a waste of Police time. … She didn't mention him being violent.What a waste of Police time. "Laying it on thick" or lying as it is known, is not the way to deal with situations like this!



    I didn't mean that necessarily she wouldn't be safe.. think the text is misconstruing my words there. If she wants a police officer to accompany her in my experience they WILL do that, but only if you're able to persuade them it'd be a good idea.

    Great use of police time, it's hard enough to get them out when you genuinely need them. I can't see the police officer being all that happy when you come away with 2 cds and a few dvds.

    jasonrat;6965253

    :? :?For a few cds?



    Personally, I wouldn't bother but if its distressing her and "doing her head in" and it's a huge loss to her personally then this is why she wants them back.

    Different people have different tolerance levels of what they can accept as a worthwhile loss and walk away happily.

    Sorry, commenting is no longer available on this discussion.

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