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    Help!!!!!!!!!!!Advice needed!

    I have recently split from my partner of 20 years!

    We own our own home together, & have done for the last 5 years.

    I am living in the property with our 2 children who are 18 & 19, one of which is 6 months pregnant! they are both at college & work part time.

    Would my partner be able to force me to sell?

    25 Comments

    I think he can push for you to pay him 50% off the equity from the house, he cant force you to sell.
    Your best move is to go and see a solicitor and find out exactly where you stand. A lot of solicitors dealing with divorce will give a half hour free consultation,go through yell.com and give them a call

    yes definately. I beleive he could take you to court. And they would rule that way. Mainly because your children are now adults.He is not obliged by law to keep a roof over there head because of that reason alone im afraid.
    Sorry to hear how its worked out.

    Original Poster

    Thanks,

    I have got the no. of the solicitors who we used to buy the house, will make an appointment with them!

    I think sale can't be forced untill youngest child out of full time education. Really need to get proper legal advice on this one.

    AI think he could take her to court to get his half of the money, not neccessarily to sell the house, provided there was another way to pay him off.
    If all the children have left full time education then he doesnt have to provide for them in any way.

    fionamarina;4149615

    Thanks, I have got the no. of the solicitors who we used to buy the … Thanks, I have got the no. of the solicitors who we used to buy the house, will make an appointment with them!



    Find out if that solicitors deal with that sort of thing, most canveyancing solicitors dont.

    happened to a friend of mine - she has 4 yr old - her ex went to court to sell house - the bar steward won

    if this happens to you - ( i really hope it doesnt) make sure that the agreement on any profit that you get will be


    Gross and not Net

    in friends case her ex ' s solicitor tried to play dirty by asking for ex solicitors fees to come out of house proceeds

    you claim for more as you have baby

    go and get your name down now on housing association/council and explain what could happen - i.e you would be homeless - dont leave it to last minute

    really dont envy your predicament -

    good luck

    would he do tht too his kids?

    On a positve note, with house prices at major low, you may just get to keep the house at a bargain price!

    Say it was worth £100,000 when you bought it and had a 100% - £100,000 mortgage for it, It may only be worth say £130,00 now and say your mortgage balance is at £80,000, you may have to pay him £25,000 to keep the house! (130,000 - 80,00 = 50,000 divided by 2 = £25,000!

    All you do is try to re-mortgage for £105,00 and pay him off!

    Hope it all works out as best as it can for you! - Been there and done that too! It honestly gets better!

    ifyoudontask?;4149691

    On a positve note, with house prices at major low, you may just get to … On a positve note, with house prices at major low, you may just get to keep the house at a bargain price!Say it was worth £100,000 when you bought it and had a 100% - £100,000 mortgage for it, It may only be worth say £130,00 now and say your mortgage balance is at £80,000, you may have to pay him £25,000 to keep the house! (130,000 - 80,00 = 50,000 divided by 2 = £25,000!All you do is try to re-mortgage for £105,00 and pay him off!Hope it all works out as best as it can for you! - Been there and done that too! It honestly gets better!



    P.s. £25k to get him out of your life could be the best £25k you ever spent - Bargin! :thumbsup:

    I don't know for sure but our neighbour was in a similar boat when her husband left her, the kids were around 17 and 20 and I'm sure that as the eldest had left school (don't think college counts) then he could force her to sell. It wasn't immediate but after a year the for sale board was up although she kept refusing offers and after about another year she got a payrise at work so bought him out of the house. The youngest has just turned 20 and has a 6 month old boy so a similar situation to you, I'm pretty sure that the cut off age is around 16, although you'd hope that he wouldn't want to kick his own kids out on the street.

    Good luck, hope it all works out for you.

    ifyoudontask?;4149715

    P.s. £25k to get him out of your life could be the best £25k you ever s … P.s. £25k to get him out of your life could be the best £25k you ever spent - Bargin! :thumbsup:



    The guy could be on ok guy, no one hear knows the circumstances, at the end of the day if a couple splits up they are entitled to half down the middle if it is ammicable, maybe he needs money to move on with his life and get new property, how come in all cases everyone assumes the man is at fault? :whistling:

    esq3585;4149767

    The guy could be on ok guy, no one hear knows the circumstances, at the … The guy could be on ok guy, no one hear knows the circumstances, at the end of the day if a couple splits up they are entitled to half down the middle if it is ammicable, maybe he needs money to move on with his life and get new property, how come in all cases everyone assumes the man is at fault? :whistling:



    I dont thing they were implying that the man was at fault, just pointing out that 25k to make a clean financial break and own the home to themselves, could be a bargain.

    esq3585;4149767

    The guy could be on ok guy, no one hear knows the circumstances, at the … The guy could be on ok guy, no one hear knows the circumstances, at the end of the day if a couple splits up they are entitled to half down the middle if it is ammicable, maybe he needs money to move on with his life and get new property, how come in all cases everyone assumes the man is at fault? :whistling:



    Fair point, but from my own experience, a split usually means a break up and assuming after 20 years and two children it may not be very easy for either party.

    Thats why getting this settled and moving on quickly may be the best option.

    I agree about the 50/50 split of all property but some circumstances may favour one partner over another.

    In prob about 75% of all long term marrages break ups - its usually the mans falt.

    oh, and im a man.

    ChipSticks;4149805

    I dont thing they were implying that the man was at fault, just pointing … I dont thing they were implying that the man was at fault, just pointing out that 25k to make a clean financial break and own the home to themselves, could be a bargain.



    Thanks, :thumbsup:

    Original Poster

    Thanks for all your comments ppl.

    I dont think he would put his kids out on the street, but at the same time he has to be able to afford to keep a roof over his own head too.

    He isnt a bad guy, i just dont think we were good together!

    ifyoudontask?;4149842

    In prob about 75% of all long term marrages break ups - its usually the … In prob about 75% of all long term marrages break ups - its usually the mans falt.oh, and im a man.



    Interesting stat. Where did that come from?

    hellfire;4149874

    Interesting stat. Where did that come from?



    83% of statistics are made up on the spot....

    ChipSticks;4149902

    83% of statistics are made up on the spot....




    I heard it was 67%... or maybe 72%.. i can't remember :whistling:

    ChipSticks;4149902

    83% of statistics are made up on the spot....



    :-D

    stay calm until you have spoken to the solicitor, don't forget you are entitled to an equal share of his assets too!
    if he is in a good job his pension should be worth a few bob, thats half yours!
    you will come out of it in a better financial position than he will,
    after your free solicitors appointment try and sort it out without involving them otherwise they will be driving around in new cars etc and you will be skint!

    hellfire;4149874

    Interesting stat. Where did that come from?



    Well i know four couples who got divorced and in three cases it was the guys fault. - Only kidding,

    There are various statistics available ( how accurite they are are debatable!) The most recent one i saw was various statistics from the "divorce statics in England".

    The obvious belief is that in the majority of divorces the reason was "unreasonable behaviour of the husband" causing the seperation followed by "seperation of two years by consent".

    National statistics is very interesting if you suffer from insomnia.! ;-)

    ifyoudontask?;4150027

    National statistics is very interesting if you suffer from insomnia.! ;-)



    Try hot milk or a lavender bath instead :thumbsup::-D

    One statistic that can't be questioned is that it is the Adults fault 100% of the time for marriage breakups.
    The kids just suffer normally. :x:x

    1. He can't force you to sell if you don't want to only the courts can.
    2. Can you afford the mortgage yourself as he will not have to pay towards it if he is not living in the property. If you can't then there is no option but to sell.
    2. When the youngest child leaves education or 19 whichever is the latter , if you are going throug a divorce now he can put a claim on the property the sale will have to go ahead when the child leaves education or if you have someone moving in after 6 mths he can force the sale as well, if you go with the mortgage on your own you will then after this time have to pay him the agreed % of the value of the property

    PS Went through this myself a few years ago good luck
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