How much to charge for keep

43
Found 12th Jul
Hey
My partner is moving in to my place after 3 years.
He has a mate that will rent his flat from him, at just below market value.
I will continue to pay all the bill, with the food being split in half.
I also have an electric car, so we will use this to commute to the station and drive around town etc.
How much should I charge him? I said £200 a month was fair, but he isn’t happy about it and wants an exact breakdown of what it is for. When I mention things like insurance or broadband, he is saying that they are not ‘additional bills’ so he won’t contribute. So what’s ‘fair’?
Just to add, we both earn similar money.
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I’ve a better idea, You suggest moving into his flat with him, you rent out your place and pay him a small amount a month to help towards the mortgage and any bills. Then you keep whatever is left from renting your property out.
See what his reaction is?
Edited by: "Toptrumpet" 12th Jul
Wow! £45 per week and he isn't happy. Tell him to do one as that's ridiculous.
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deleted396333
This isn't going to end well.
Split all the bills down the middle.

...Or get "Mug" tattooed across your forehead.
Edited by: "RossD89" 12th Jul
43 Comments
200 a month seems really cheap for somewhere to stay, and even cheaper of that's including bills and use of car. But that does depend on location, and room(s) etc
I think £200 pretty much covers half the food bill, water, council tax, gas and electric. Being a partner means living in each others pockets so in the long run it's not much cash.
Wow! £45 per week and he isn't happy. Tell him to do one as that's ridiculous.
Ask him how much he was expecting to give you. Or was he thinking it was a free ride?

I’d be worried about his overall intention in the relationship if he is refusing to be fair.

You’re paying a mortgage still. He’s effectively not, so he’s going to be better off, and he’s still not happy making a small contribution to you.
Edited by: "choccie32" 12th Jul
If you both earn similar it should be 50/50 imo
That's insanely cheap, I'd question the whole thing if they are being that petty already, especially when I doubt that's even half and they're about to get additional income from the rent which I presume is way more than £200 so they'll end up with more disposable income than they had before.
ch7leach50 m ago

200 a month seems really cheap for somewhere to stay, and even cheaper of …200 a month seems really cheap for somewhere to stay, and even cheaper of that's including bills and use of car. But that does depend on location, and room(s) etc


Small 3 bed house in Milton Keynes
Tell your partner to jog on. 3 years and he biatches about sharing bills ?


Let's put it in a perspective.
He will be renting a flat to someone else. How much is his mortgage repayments band how much will he be getting from rent.

How much are all your bills (except personal stuff like mobile or anything that only you can use)

Split that in half

At no point the should be much better off than you in terms of bills .
Tell him to find another place for less - just have a look for places to rent around the area - you will see how expensive they really are.

Also I couldn't quite follow when you said you are paying the bills - I take it you're not paying the bills for your partners flat, because that would add up to a lot of money that the renter should be paying.
Bigfootpete1 m ago

Tell him to find another place for less - just have a look for places to …Tell him to find another place for less - just have a look for places to rent around the area - you will see how expensive they really are.Also I couldn't quite follow when you said you are paying the bills - I take it you're not paying the bills for your partners flat, because that would add up to a lot of money that the renter should be paying.


No, sorry, I am paying all the bills for my place, which he is moving in to.
I would tell him exactly what you have to pay for, if you add up all the bills plus mortgage/rent then it must show him that you are paying for a lot, so they should contribute.

You are not a charity, and bills should be shared equally.
Sit down with a pad, work out all bills for the month.

Food, phone/Internet, mortgage/rent, electricity/gas

Then pay half each.
Cheeky sod.
So he’s renting his own place for just below market value but probably for more than his mortgage.
You’re paying your mortgage and all the bills, including car that both will benefit from.
He’s making a profit on his mortgage and paying no bills. What does he expect to pay?
It could be you earn a lot more and has been struggling keeping up, could be up to eye’s in debt etc.
You both need to lay your cards on the table and take it from there.
It could be you don’t want to put them on the bills to make any potential issues later easy to split, etc.
We can’t make decisions for you but I think a deep soul search is in order for you both.
On face value he needs a reality check. What about rather than set a value, give him bills to pay. He may resent £200 as it seems more like a lodger that could be turfed in a whim.
Oneday773 m ago

So he’s renting his own place for just below market value but probably for …So he’s renting his own place for just below market value but probably for more than his mortgage. You’re paying your mortgage and all the bills, including car that both will benefit from. He’s making a profit on his mortgage and paying no bills. What does he expect to pay?It could be you earn a lot more and has been struggling keeping up, could be up to eye’s in debt etc. You both need to lay your cards on the table and take it from there. It could be you don’t want to put them on the bills to make any potential issues later easy to split, etc. We can’t make decisions for you but I think a deep soul search is in order for you both. On face value he needs a reality check. What about rather than set a value, give him bills to pay. He may resent £200 as it seems more like a lodger that could be turfed in a whim.


Thanks for the comment. We are both debt free (other than mortgages) and we are on similar pay.
Avatar
deleted396333
This isn't going to end well.
Split all the bills down the middle.

...Or get "Mug" tattooed across your forehead.
Edited by: "RossD89" 12th Jul
lukas070413 m ago

Thanks for the comment. We are both debt free (other than mortgages) and …Thanks for the comment. We are both debt free (other than mortgages) and we are on similar pay.


In which case he’s going to be financially far better off than you. He’s effectively not paying a mortgage or bills, though I hope he’s keeping house insurance up.

3 likely scenarios here
- Commitment issues
-Greedy and self serving
-Completely oblivious and out of touch with reality.

Seriously, sit down. Detail all finances incoming/outgoings, don’t factor in savings. Once the reality of the figures are there he may see sense. If it’s lots of defensive manoeuvres, I think you have your answer.
Seems to me his priorities are himself, his mate and then you.
Well explain in a little more detail such as how much you guys earn, how many rooms, what's the market value of the place

£200 sounds cheap but idk since that depends on location, rooms, size, value
Edited by: "Norseg" 12th Jul
Norseg3 m ago

Well explain in a little more detail such as how much you guys earn, how …Well explain in a little more detail such as how much you guys earn, how many rooms, what's the market value of the place£200 sounds cheap but idk since that depends on location, rooms, size, value


We are both on well above average salaries. It is a 3 bedroom house, not a big one or anything, but I just finished doing it up, new bathroom, new kitchen, new carpets, windows, doors etc. Market value of my place £250k, market value of his flat circa £230k
£200 is a bargain. He's taking you for a ride. Tell him to pay up or jog on.
lukas070426 m ago

We are both on well above average salaries. It is a 3 bedroom house, not a …We are both on well above average salaries. It is a 3 bedroom house, not a big one or anything, but I just finished doing it up, new bathroom, new kitchen, new carpets, windows, doors etc. Market value of my place £250k, market value of his flat circa £230k


Than £200 is good but than again you own the house so what is the £200 for lol
Do you own it fully or is it a mortgage?
Edited by: "Norseg" 12th Jul
Norseg15 m ago

Than £200 is good but than again you own the house so what is the £200 for …Than £200 is good but than again you own the house so what is the £200 for lolDo you own it fully or is it a mortgage?


Our both properties are on a mortgage. But he isn’t named on mine or vice versa
Norseg23 m ago

Than £200 is good but than again you own the house so what is the £200 for …Than £200 is good but than again you own the house so what is the £200 for lolDo you own it fully or is it a mortgage?


You'll understand when you grow up that households do not run for free.

For a start Council tax single occupier discount of 25% is no longer valid when more than one adult resides there.
Utility bills increase as you tend to heat more rooms, have more showers, use the washing machine more.
Additional wear results in more maintenance.

It is only fair that an adult pays towards the place they live in. Especially when they can afford it.
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I taks it his mate paying rent is more than likely covering his mortgage if not more, and now he expects to move in with you and have no other bills, he will be sitting there with all his wages like lord of the manner why you keep a roof over his head. You need to watch him as he may use his mates rent money and his own wages to get his mortgage quickly paid of within a few years, then kick you and his flat mate to the Kerb and return to his flat mortgage free.
Edited by: "SOUTHWALES" 12th Jul
I’ve a better idea, You suggest moving into his flat with him, you rent out your place and pay him a small amount a month to help towards the mortgage and any bills. Then you keep whatever is left from renting your property out.
See what his reaction is?
Edited by: "Toptrumpet" 12th Jul
Nice one Toptrumpet!
Are you sure you want to live with someone like that?... He sounds completely unreasonable and like he is only doing it to take advantage of the situation for his own gain. You may be taking this step too early...

For comparison, my missus contributes £250 a month plus food and has done for years.

We have home and contents insurance, virgin media broadband, TV licence, water, gas, electric, council tax. I cover mortgage and maintenance as well. If she earned as much as I do I'd expect a more equal contribution.

£200 a month is a bargain in my opinion.
Agree with Toptrumpet. Put the spin on it and see his reaction!
I moved into my partners house.

My partner pays the important bills
rent, council tax, gas, electric.

I pay for the food shopping, sky & my car as he doesnt drive yet.

like above, this isnt going to end wellx hes already started taking you for a ride
Edited by: "Caroline_1993" 12th Jul
With his outlook on life's finances, I don't think your relationship will last unfortunately

One bit of advice, don't, whatever you do, put his name on the mortgage, keep everything separate.

He's laughing really, he's got his house that he's making money out of, no responsibility for bills and making use of your car, personally, I'd say if he's not willing to pay a lot more, I'd advise you to keep your living arrangements separate until he grows up and gets in the real world.

In saying the above, if you both truly love each other, I'm sure it can be worked out, but, please don't be taken for a ride with the finances.
Is this not a joke? I think you need a new partner..

He's moving into your place. He should be offering to pay the entire mortgage knowing how much household bills cost.
I hate to be a bit harsh but if he really wanted to live with you and cared for you there is no way he would be complaining about £200 month. Most people's reaction to that would have been 'don't be silly, I'm paying at least half of your total monthly costs on everything' The fact hes worried about his own finances over yours doesn't look good for the future.
wait a min, you are moving in, so 50/50 of course unless you have bills he does use

example
he should not pay towards your loans, phone bill or personal clothes/cleaning items
if a full share of car, maybe good for him to put in
remember if he starts to pay towards a mortage, he can ask for a share of house of you split.
I agree with what others have said 50/50 on shared bills.
I can only imagine what the arguments will be like if you ever needed to buy a new Washing machine or Fridge etc
This has got fail written all over it am affraid. You need to sit down and have a serious talk about this before doing it. You can’t expect him to pay the mortgage unless he part owns the house (which I would not advise) but I would expect him to pay a minimum of half of all bills. Plus something towards the upkeep of the house and maintenance.

Also never let him pay for any thing in the house that can’t be easy removed ie a kitchen or bathroom as he would then have a financial interest in the house.
Maybe I'm a bit out of touch (correct me if I'm wrong) but when it started to get serious with my partner 20 years ago we just pooled our money into a joint account, we trusted each other with the money spent.
I’ll move in for £200 a month
In 2003 I started work on £3.16 an hour I gave my mom £120 every 4 weeks then and paid £30 for 3 for 30 package on Virgin them where the days! £150 so that’s well cheap! I can’t believe some people don’t charge there kids board ! Sooner they get used to Budgeting the better! There was no 4/5 Just Eats a Week neither! So £200 is well cheap!!
Edited by: "ASongOfFireAndIce" 12th Jul
@lukas0704 Before you agree to him moving in, I would ask him if he has permission from his mortgage company to rent out his flat, because if it’s a residential only mortgage this might be against their terms and conditions.
While he looks into that take the time to negotiate how much he should contribute monthly. If for example the difference between his mortgage and proposed rent from his friend is say £400, then perhaps he should pay £400 plus your council tax, if it’s £600 then perhaps he should pay you £600 and you still pay the bills, if it’s only £200 then perhaps he should pay you £200 plus half the bills etc.
Finances are a major cause of many break ups and therefore clarity is needed before he moves in and don’t take any ‘yeah, yeah we’ll work it out as we go along’ scenario and if procrastinates in agreeing anything then perhaps he shouldn’t move in yet.
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