How to amuse yourself in Tesco

    Proof of what can happen if a wife or girlfriend drags her husband or
    boyfriend along shopping

    This letter was recently sent by Tesco's Head Office to a customer

    Oxford :

    Dear Mrs. Murray,

    While we thank you for your valued custom and use of the Tesco Loyalty

    Card, the Manager of our store in Banbury is considering banning you

    and your family from shopping with us, unless your husband stops his

    antics. Below is a list of offences over the past few months all

    verified by our surveillance cameras:

    1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in

    people's trolleys when they weren't looking.

    2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-

    minute intervals.

    3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to

    feminine products aisle.

    4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone,

    'Code 3' in housewares..... and watched what happened.

    5. August 14:
    Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted

    6. September 15: Set up a tent in the outdoor clothing department
    told shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring sausages and
    a Calor gas stove.

    7. September 23: When the Deputy Manager asked if she could help him,
    he began to cry and asked, 'Why can't you people just leave
    me alone?'

    8. October 4: Looked right into the security camera; used it as a
    mirror, picked his nose, and ate it.

    9. November 10: While appearing to be choosing kitchen knives in the
    Housewares aisle asked an assistant if he knew where the

    10. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously, loudly humming
    Mission Impossible'

    11. December 6: In the kitchenware aisle, practised the 'Madonna
    look' using different size funnels.

    12. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed,
    'PICK ME!' 'PICK ME!'

    13. December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker,
    assumed the foetal position and screamed 'NO! NO! It's those
    voices again.'

    And; last, but not least:

    14. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited a
    while; then yelled, very loudly, 'There is no toilet paper
    in here.'


    Tee Hee Hee. Made me laugh. :thumbsup:

    is that your husband or how would you know???


    :lol: funny!!

    Fantastic... Sounds like my Dad!

    I can see all my mates reading this 1st thing tomorow when they get in work.

    obviously fake but funny

    Someone emailed this to me a few weeks back, very funny



    That's funny ! I wish someone would do stuff like that when i do my tesco shopping, would make it much more interesting! lol !


    obviously fake but funny



    That's funny ! I wish someone would do stuff like that when i do my tesco … That's funny ! I wish someone would do stuff like that when i do my tesco shopping, would make it much more interesting! lol !

    staff often do the condom one to other staff members my hubby did it a few times in his teenage years


    lol.. very good

    i dont take my husband shopping any more because when we get to the tills and all the shopping has gone through he would shout HOW MUCH very loud

    haha genious

    heres another idea, its from the comedy legend that is ross noble

    when out shopping and feeling rather bored, if you do not have dog pick up a can of dog food, and shout your partners name untill they eveyone in that isle is looking, when she finally shouts "what" ask her if you need any dog food, and wait for " no we havent got a dog"

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