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    IT'S A PURE DEAD GIVE-AWAY THAT YOU'RE SCOTTISH IF :-

    1. you consider scattered showers with outbreaks of sunshine is good weather

    2. the only sausage you like is square

    3. you have been forced to do Scottish country dancing every year at primary school

    4. you have a wide vocabulary of Scottish words such as numpty, aye, aye right, auldjin, baltic...

    5. you destroyed your teeth when you were young using Buchanan's toffee, Wham bars, Penny Dainties, MB Bars, Cola Cubes etc

    6. you have an enormous feeling of dread whenever Scotland play a 'numpty' team like the Faroe Islands

    7. you happily engage in a conversation about the weather with someone you've never met before

    8. even if you normally hate the Proclaimers, Runrig, Caledonia , Deacon Blue and Big Country, you still love it when you're in a club abroad and they play something Scottish

    9. you used to watch Glen Michael's Cavalcade on a Sunday afternoon with his side kick Lamp Paladin

    10. you got Oor Wullie and The Broons annuals at Xmas

    11. you can tell where another Scot is from by their accent - "Awright, pal, gonnae gies a wee swatch oa yur Sun ? Cheers, magic pal." Or "Fit ya bin up tae ? Fair few quines in the nicht, eh ?", etc

    12. you see cops and hear someone shout 'Errapolis'

    13. you have participated in or watched people having a 'square go'

    14. you know that when someone asks you what school you went to they only want to know if you are catholic or protestant

    15. you have eaten lots and lots of random Scottish food like mince 'n tatties, Tunnock's Caramel Logs, oat cakes, haggis, Cullen skink, Lees Macaroon Bars, etc

    16. a jakey has asked you for money

    17. you think nothing of waiting expectantly for your 1p change from a shop keeper

    18. you know the right response to 'Ye dancing ?' is 'Y'askin?' followed by 'Ahm askin' and finally 'Then ahm dancin'

    19. whenever you see sawdust it reminds you of pools of vomit as that's what the jannies used to chuck on it at school

    20. you lose all respect for a groom who doesn't wear a kilt

    21. you don't do shopping... you 'go the messages'

    22. you're sitting on the train or bus and a drunk man sits next to you telling you a joke - and asking 'Ahm no annoying ye ahm a?' and you respond 'Naw, not at a', yer fine. This is ma stoap, but'

    23. you can have an entire phone conversation using only the words 'awright', 'aye' and 'naw'

    24. you have experienced peer pressure to have an alcoholic drink when out - regardless of the circumstances

    25. you know that ye cannae fling yer pieces oot a 20 storey flat, and that seven hundred hungry weans'll testify tae that. Furthermore you're sure that if it's butter, cheese or jeely, or if the breid is plain or pan, the odds against it reaching earth are 99 tae wan

    26. you know that going to a party at a friend's house involves bringing your own drink

    27. your holiday abroad is ruined if you hear there is a heatwave in Scotland while you're away

    28. your national team goes 2-0 up again the Czechs in a qualifier in Prague and your mate says we'll end up losing 3-2 here and you think "Probably"

    29. you can properly pronounce McConnochie, Ecclefechan, Milngavie, and Auchtermuchty

    30. your favourite pizza is deep fried and battered from the chippy

    31. you're used to 4 seasons in one day

    32. you can't pass a chip shop or kebab shop, without drooling, when your drunk

    33. you can fall about drunk without spilling your drink

    34. you measure distance in minutes

    35. you can understand Rab C Nesbitt and know characters just like them in your own family

    36. you go to Saltcoats because you think it's like being at the ocean

    37. you can make a whole sentence out of just swear words

    38. you know what haggis is made with and still eat it

    39. somebody you know used a football schedule to plan their wedding day date

    40. you've been at a wedding where the footie results were read out

    41. you aren't surprised to find curries, pizzas, kebabs, Irn Bru, nappies and fags all for sale in one shop

    42. your seaside holiday home has Calor gas under it

    43. you know that Irn Bru is an infallible hangover cure

    44. you know how long a "Wee Minute" is, and when "the back of five" is.

    45. you understand all the above and are going to send it to your pals

    46. and, finally, you are 100 per cent Scottish if you have ever used these terms - "How's it hingin'?", "clatty", "boggin", "cludgie", "dreich", "bampot", "bawheid", "baw bag" and "dubble nugget".

    20 Comments

    Many a true word ....

    9. Dont forget Rusty

    Pavers;6174618

    9. Dont forget Rusty



    i saw glen michael live in Leven when i was a kid, my mum made me stand up when asked if it was anyones birthday ( even though it wasnt) and i went up on the stage for everyone to sing happy birthday to me :oops:

    [FONT=Verdana]Number 32 is dead on accurate! :whistling:

    Cheers, Scotty Boy! :thumbsup:[/FONT]

    46. and, finally, you are 100 per cent Scottish if you have ever used these terms - "How's it hingin'?", "clatty", "boggin", "cludgie", "dreich", "bampot", "bawheid", "baw bag" and "dubble nugget".
    'Baw bag' is my most over used phrase lol (after baw jaws!)

    Banned

    43. you know that Irn Bru is an infallible hangover cure

    So true!!! :-D

    Lol, us Scots are magic xxx

    Very true made me laugh

    47 - When you drop loose change it hits you on the back of the head. ;-) :-D

    you wander the streets with an empty glass when the weatherman tells you there is a 'wee nip in the air'

    So true :lol:

    Guilty as charged - I'm defo Scottish:-D

    quality

    Some of that stuff also applies to northerners too, I guess the further you go up north, ey? :giggle:

    Very good and unfortunately most of it is true....esp no. 6

    Haven't heard Glen Michael or the jelly piece song mentioned in a long, long time....and they were right about the sawdust. Got number 3 wrong though - we still had to do country dancing at secondary school....

    PS got some Lorne sausage and scotch pies from the freezer shop at the weekend :-D

    shanecr;6174645

    i saw glen michael live in Leven when i was a kid, my mum made me stand … i saw glen michael live in Leven when i was a kid, my mum made me stand up when asked if it was anyones birthday ( even though it wasnt) and i went up on the stage for everyone to sing happy birthday to me :oops:



    At the age of 5yrs I went on the Taxi trip to Troon (was disabled) and he gave me a gold box with an action man, other toys and sweets. What a magic day.

    Great post

    i think that makes me more scottish :lol:

    46. Dubble nugget, i say tht all the time :lol:

    No.6 definitely true, got that feeling coming up for saturday in fact!!

    Although, I'm feeling strangely optimistic about the Holland game....

    26 and 27 are my favourites

    micoo;6176312

    i think that makes me more scottish :lol:46. Dubble nugget, i say tht all … i think that makes me more scottish :lol:46. Dubble nugget, i say tht all the time :lol:


    That is the ONLY think out the list I haven't heard!! In what context would you use it...so I can start lol!?!

    so true
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