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    I've got a turtle...

    Banned
    ...but I can't be bothered to let him out

    Any tips for keeping him entertained while he's in there?

    25 Comments

    I have a feeling theres a double entendre somewhere here:whistling:

    I watched a documentary once, turtles apparently like pizza.

    And the best way to get them to do what they're told is to get a giant rat to mentor them.

    Bloody good documentary...

    Stick your finger in.

    grex9101;5119342

    I watched a documentary once, turtles apparently like pizza.



    Fail

    Original Poster Banned

    thesaint;5119346

    Stick your finger in.



    Should I use lube?

    thesaint;5119346

    Stick your finger in.



    see if it bites? lol

    lumoruk;5119356

    Should I use lube?



    depends if you like pain lol

    touching cloth much?

    thesaint;5119346

    Stick your finger in.Fail



    Wow, a MOD in this thread!!!!







    Silly me, its just the stain....

    http://www.blowoff.com/images/big_prod_pics/getout/stain-remover1.jpg


    GREAT for pet stains apparently.....

    Awww, he must be someone's bet. The rodent's perhaps?


    lol

    lumoruk;5119356

    Should I use lube?



    He'll probably retreat.
    Tempt him out with some bran.

    eeeeeeeeeeeeeew, put me right off me cheesecake!

    Original Poster Banned

    thesaint;5119407

    He'll probably retreat.Tempt him out with some bran.



    Haven't got any, will a bottle of ice cold stella do it? I've seen women do it on the web

    thesaint;5119407

    He'll probably retreat.Tempt him out with some bran.



    The stain = has experience with rodents.


    (clue: not orally).

    lumoruk;5119428

    Haven't got any, will a bottle of ice cold stella do it? I've seen women … Haven't got any, will a bottle of ice cold stella do it? I've seen women do it on the web



    owwwwyy lol

    lumoruk;5119428

    Haven't got any, will a bottle of ice cold stella do it? I've seen women … Haven't got any, will a bottle of ice cold stella do it? I've seen women do it on the web



    It sounds like you actually want him out. Push him from the other side, he'll show his head and you can grab him.





    grex, why bother?
    You're as funny as skusey. No hate

    thesaint;5119478

    grex, why bother?You're as funny as skusey. No hate



    Bother with what?






    brb off to hit the spam button....


    hang on, that's YOUR job...


    lol @ wannabe mod. pathetic.

    Original Poster Banned

    starsparkle2311;5119490

    OP, try hot curry



    I had a korma last night, too mild?

    You could go the whole hog and try a mexican.....

    Original Poster Banned

    starsparkle2311;5119549

    yeh, try tandoori



    Just had haddock and chips so will have to wait till tomorrow lunch time

    I've got a turtle, a turtle deep inside
    Oh yeah, Oh yeah. (that's right.)
    I've got a turtle, a turtle I can't hide
    Oh no. no. Oh no! Oh no.
    Yeah! Yeah! I've got a turtle. Yeah!

    Oh please believe me, I'd hate to miss the train
    Oh yeah, yeah, oh yeah.
    And if you leave me I won't be late again
    Oh no, oh no, oh no.
    Yeah Yeah I've got a turtle, yeah.
    I got a feeling.

    All these years I've been wandering around,
    Wondering how come nobody told me
    All that I was looking for was somebody
    Who looked like you.

    I've got a feeling that keeps me on my toes
    Oh yeah, Oh yeah.
    I've got a turtle, I think that everybody knows.
    Oh yeah, Oh yeah, Oh yeah.
    Yeah! Yeah! I've got a turtle. Yeah!

    Ev'rybody had a hard year.
    Ev'rybody had a good time.
    Ev'rybody had a wet dream.
    Ev'rybody saw the sunshine.
    Oh yeah, Oh yeah. Oh Yeah.
    Ev'rybody had a good year.
    Ev'rybody let their hair down.
    Ev'rybody pulled their socks up. (yeah.)
    Ev'rybody put their foot down.
    Oh yeah. Yeah! WOOOOHOO!

    repeat with both parts.

    [Oh my soul...it's so hard.]

    ClarityofMind;5119556

    You could go the whole hog and try a mexican.....



    you swine!!!!



    lol

    clench and chop him in two

    if its got 2 heads it'll be fine for a while, keep itself company.
    http://www.foxnews.com/images/310249/2_61_turtle_two_heads.jpg

    :thumbsup: try makin turtle soup or turtle wax

    grex9101;5119574

    you swine!!!!lol



    these jokes arent funny unless they pass into normal conversation lol

    He'll go straight to sleep if you drink about 6 units of acohol ( less if you're lucky):thumbsup:
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