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    Jack And Jill Went Up The Hill...

    Jack And Jill Went Up The Hill...

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    Jack was going to be married to Jill, so his father sat him down for a little fireside chat.....

    He said, "Jack, let me tell you something. On my wedding night in our honeymoon suite, I took off my pants and handed them to your mother, and said, 'Here, try these on.'

    "So, she did and said, 'These are too big, I can't wear them.'

    "I replied, 'Exactly. I wear the pants in this family and I always will.'

    "Ever since that night we have never had any problems."

    "Hmmm," said Jack. He thought that might be a good thing to try. So on his honeymoon, Jack took off his pants and said to Jill, "Here try these on."

    So she did and said, "These are too large, they don't fit me."

    Jack said, "Exactly. I wear the pants in this family and I always will, and I don't want you to ever forget that."

    Then Jill took off her pants and handed them to Jack and said, "Here, you try on mine."

    So he did and said, "I can't get into your pants."

    Jill said, "Exactly. And if you don't change your smart ass attitude, you never will."

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    7 Comments

    LOL! rep added reminded me of this little poem;

    Jack and Jill went up the hill for some hanky-panky
    But Jill forgot to take her pill
    and now there's little Frankie! :thumbsup:

    Original Poster

    Snailman;2468940

    LOL! rep added reminded me of this little poem;Jack and Jill went up the … LOL! rep added reminded me of this little poem;Jack and Jill went up the hill for some hanky-pankyBut Jill forgot to take her pilland now there's little Frankie! :thumbsup:


    v good :thumbsup:

    Original Poster

    [CENTER]http://www.wedding-flowers-and-reception-ideas.com/images/funny-wedding-cake-topper01.jpg




    http://www.wedding-flowers-and-reception-ideas.com/images/runaway-bride-cake-topper01.jpg[/CENTER]

    Original Poster

    [CENTER]http://www.marriagetransformation.com/Graphics/Cartoons/PerfectlyFunnyMarriagePage6.jpg[/CENTER]

    http://icanhascheezburger.files.wordpress.com/2007/04/i-has-a-marriage.jpg

    Original Poster

    He said...I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it.
    She said...You wear pants don't you?
    He said...Shall we try swapping positions tonight?
    She said...That's a good idea - you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa.
    He said...What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?
    She said...Turn sideways and look in the mirror!
    On a wall in a ladies room..."My husband follows me everywhere"
    Written just below it... "I do not"
    Q.How many honest, intelligent, caring men in the world does it take to do the dishes?
    A.Both of them.
    Q.How does a man show that he is planning for the future?
    A.He buys two cases of beer.
    Q.What is the difference between men and government bonds?
    A.The bonds mature.
    Q.Why are blonde jokes so short?
    A.So men can remember them.
    Q. How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
    A.We don't know; it has never happened.
    Q.What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
    A. A widow.
    Q.Why are married women heavier than single women?
    A.Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed. Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge.
    Q.What is the one thing that all men at singles bars have in common?
    A.They're married.
    Man says to God: "God, why did you make woman so beautiful?"
    God says: "So you would love her."
    But God," the man says, "why did you make her so dumb?"
    God says: "So she would love you."

    We love you .................. so much x

    Original Poster

    Did you know that a man is made up of many useless things?
    He has an Adam's apple that isn't an apple.
    Two calves that will never become cows.
    A nose bridge that doesn't lead anywhere.
    A roof of the mouth that won't cover anything.
    Twenty nails that won't hold a board.
    A chest that won't hold linen.
    Two boobs that won't give milk.
    Two buns that won't feed anyone.
    A belly button that won't button.
    An organ that won't play music.
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