Let's rewrite a classic: ''twas the night before Christmas"

76
Found 13th Dec 2017
Let see see how creative we can be and rewrite a classic write a line each rhyming with the person above youand see what we can come up with

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For the farmer with the armpit length rubber glove

When the Gloved Farmer, Jackson, Bean, Jean Claude, Ventura & Santa watch the farmers wife & Mrs Clause mount it for fun
Edited by: "haritori" 14th Dec 2017

A bag so strong built not to pollute
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Original Poster

''Twas the night before christmas
Edited by: "confusedfashion19" 13th Dec 2017

When all through the barn

The livestock were waiting

For the farmer with the armpit length rubber glove

neilscutt17 m ago

The livestock were waiting


For Jesus, just west of Tehran
Edited by: "Deal0rN0Dea1" 13th Dec 2017

The cow bells where hung on the wall with ease

MSK.6 m ago

For the farmer with the armpit length rubber glove


And in his fanny pack, a little baby dove

And the barn door was closed so the lambs didn’t freeze

As he thought to himself I hope she doesn't sneeze.

While the farmers wife was pleasuring him down on her knees
Edited by: "haritori" 13th Dec 2017

When all of a sudden outside in the yard

There stood a giraffe with a ball made of yarn.

And the cheesiest grin that you ever did see

and lawyers not taken the pee !

With a Lancashire accent, he shouted aloud

That tonight’s Christmas Eve and he fell from the sleigh

neilscutt2 m ago

That tonight’s Christmas Eve and he fell from the sleigh


When he woke up he said neigh neigh neigh

Which began the dispute regarding giraffes pulling sleighs

But that was just one of the yarns that snowballed in days

It’s cause the police stepped in and stopped the affray

While the farmer and his wife were amongst the hay! On seeing the couple police shouted "stop"! Ok said the farmer it's a fair cop.

Then santa appeared with an awful fake tan

Then he was sidekicked to the throat, by our hero, Jackie Chan

And Baldrick said " What a cunning plan "

Just a shame santa looked like an oompa loompa man.

All of a sudden did Zombie Micheal Jackson appear

Half black and half white, and causing great fear

he broke into song and dance to a great cheer!

alas, it was a frenzied dance, once again Pepsi hair blaze fear.

Edited by: "cicobuff" 14th Dec 2017

Original Poster

Then off with the moonwalk as he started to cheer

Then Mr. Bean in his Firemam's Suit

Ran away with Michael's Pepsi job loot.

And during this time Mrs Claus was thinking

Original Poster

While mr clause was sat on his backside drinking

Joined Joanna Lumley playing the flute.

One of the crowd proclaimed "stop that Bean thief!, carrying that money in the Tesco Jute"


32735276-5sbDo.jpg

A bag so strong built not to pollute

Then up on the roof was heard a great clatter

Mr Bean fell off, the jute's contents did scatter
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