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    Make me laugh :o)

    Having a crap evening, so could do with having a laugh.

    Rep for anyone who manages to put a smile on this miserable *******s face !

    80 Comments

    Fancy a hob nob hun??:giggle:

    What's up hun? U don't usually do miserable!! x

    Original Poster

    hannah19790;2923879

    Fancy a hob nob hun??:giggle:



    That was a good start Thanks hun x

    hotukdeals.com/ite…e-/ :whistling:

    cheer up m8 whats up

    Today Scientists discovered a ring of debris
    around Uranus ;-)

    An idiot decides to start up a chicken farm, so he buys a hundred chickens to get up and running.
    A month later he returns to the dealer to get another hundred chickens because the first lot had died.
    Another month passes and he's back at the dealers for another hundred chickens, "I think I know where I'm going wrong" he tells the dealer,
    "I think I'm planting them too deep."

    Original Poster

    hannah19790;2923886

    What's up hun? U don't usually do miserable!! x



    Nah I know.... there's a first time for everything though :oops: Just need cheering up..... choc hob nobs were a good start !!

    blo*dy smile coz i cant got a humpin great big abscess on my face :-(

    Original Poster

    csamual;2923897

    cheer up m8 whats up



    Thanks, but didn't make me laugh.... feel free to try again :thumbsup:

    charver;2923900

    Today Scientists discovered a ring of debrisaround Uranus ;-)



    Bought a smile, no laughter though

    wonkey;2923904

    This is funnyhttp://www.hotukdeals.com/item/24007...86#post2921886



    Link is dead...... so's my facial expression :-(

    marktuck;2923905

    An idiot decides to start up a chicken farm, so he buys a hundred … An idiot decides to start up a chicken farm, so he buys a hundred chickens to get up and running. A month later he returns to the dealer to get another hundred chickens because the first lot had died. Another month passes and he's back at the dealers for another hundred chickens, "I think I know where I'm going wrong" he tells the dealer,"I think I'm planting them too deep."



    :lol: rep left

    i went to the pub with amir kahn yesterday,
    he well stingy, dint even get in one round

    foxymissroxy;2923911

    blo*dy smile coz i cant got a humpin great big abscess on my face :-(


    http://www.007flowers.co.uk/images/get-well-soon-balloons.jpg

    Original Poster

    foxymissroxy;2923911

    blo*dy smile coz i cant got a humpin great big abscess on my face :-(



    sorry to hear that ....... made me feel worse now :-(

    Wonkey

    what was funny I can't get link to work :oops:

    duck walks into a bar and asks the barman if he has a piece of bread. the barman says 'we don't sell bread now get out!'. next day the duck walks into the bar and asks the barman if he has a piece of bread. barman says 'no i told you yesterday, we don't sell bread, now ****** off'. next day the duck goes in and asks the barman if he has a piece of bread. barman says 'i told you yesterday WE DON'T SELL BREAD. if you asks one more time i'm going to nail you f***ink feet to the counter now GET OUT!' the duck leaves.
    next day the duck walks into the bar and asks the barman if he has any nails. the barman says 'no'. duck says 'have you got a piece of bread then???' :-D:thumbsup::w00t:

    Original Poster

    Cluffy321;2923933

    i went to the pub with amir kahn yesterday,he well stingy, dint even get … i went to the pub with amir kahn yesterday,he well stingy, dint even get in one round



    got a smile out of me..... try again and you might get a laugh out of me yet :thumbsup:

    wonkey;2923938

    try this .. sorry!http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/7604290.stm



    Poor bloke :-(

    Knock Knock

    Original Poster

    charver;2923947

    Wonkeywhat was funny I can't get link to work :oops:



    No link, no laughter :-(

    lyndsbowes;2923962

    duck walks into a bar and asks the barman if he has a piece of bread. the … duck walks into a bar and asks the barman if he has a piece of bread. the barman says 'we don't sell bread now get out!'. next day the duck walks into the bar and asks the barman if he has a piece of bread. barman says 'no i told you yesterday, we don't sell bread, now ****** off'. next day the duck goes in and asks the barman if he has a piece of bread. barman says 'i told you yesterday WE DON'T SELL BREAD. if you asks one more time i'm going to nail you f***ink feet to the counter now GET OUT!' the duck leaves.next day the duck walks into the bar and asks the barman if he has any nails. the barman says 'no'. duck says 'have you got a piece of bread then???' :-D:thumbsup:



    :lol: rep left

    Original Poster

    charver;2923976

    Knock Knock



    whos there :?

    Paddy meets Mick in the street & says
    "i would close your curtains when making love to your wife mate
    all the neighbours were laughing at you yesterday"
    "well" says paddy "the laugh is on them! cos i wasn't home yesterday!"

    DOH! lol

    Aaaaarrrrrrrrtish

    What's the first sign of madness?
    Suggs walking up your driveway!

    I worked as a stand-up comedian in an old people's home once........
    None of them understood my jokes but they still p***ed themselves

    Bless you :-D

    marktuck;2924018

    I worked as a stand-up comedian in an old people's home once........ None … I worked as a stand-up comedian in an old people's home once........ None of them understood my jokes but they still p***ed themselves



    LMFAO:-D

    What about my Knock Knock joke
    how many points for that one. :thumbsup:

    A mother, cleaning her son's room, finds an S&M magazine under the bed.
    Upset, she immediately shows the magazine to her husband.
    "Well?" his wife asks. "What do you think we should do?"
    "I'm not sure," the father replies. "But we certainly shouldn't spank him."

    Original Poster

    nicki3668;2923998

    Paddy meets Mick in the street & says"i would close your curtains when … Paddy meets Mick in the street & says"i would close your curtains when making love to your wife mateall the neighbours were laughing at you yesterday""well" says paddy "the laugh is on them! cos i wasn't home yesterday!"DOH! lol



    LMAO..... rep left (deserves two lots of rep this if I'm honest :-D)

    charver;2924000

    Aaaaarrrrrrrrtish



    bless you :?

    marktuck;2924003

    What's the first sign of madness? Suggs walking up your driveway!



    not bad, not laughter material though :thumbsup:

    wonkey;2924010

    http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/7604290.stm



    Didn't do it for me the first time :-(

    Don't Know if you read it yet

    A young boy approaches his mother and asks
    " Why do women get married in white ?"

    His Mother replies
    " Because females are angelic, virginal creatures and white
    is the colour of angels."

    The boy asks his dad the same question,
    to which the father replies,
    "All kitchen appliances are white, son." :thumbsup:

    Original Poster

    marktuck;2924018

    I worked as a stand-up comedian in an old people's home once........ None … I worked as a stand-up comedian in an old people's home once........ None of them understood my jokes but they still p***ed themselves



    nearly there :thumbsup:

    charver;2924050

    What about my Knock Knock jokehow many points for that one. :thumbsup:



    I got confused after your sneezing outburst :-(

    marktuck;2924059

    A mother, cleaning her son's room, finds an S&M magazine under the bed. … A mother, cleaning her son's room, finds an S&M magazine under the bed. Upset, she immediately shows the magazine to her husband. "Well?" his wife asks. "What do you think we should do?" "I'm not sure," the father replies. "But we certainly shouldn't spank him."



    :lol: that one did it !! rep left

    How about this video of a wall being wrecked by a chav.
    youtube.com/wat…wLg

    Original Poster

    charver;2924094

    Don't Know if you read it yetA young boy approaches his mother and asks" … Don't Know if you read it yetA young boy approaches his mother and asks" Why do women get married in white ?"His Mother replies" Because females are angelic, virginal creatures and whiteis the colour of angels."The boy asks his dad the same question,to which the father replies,"All kitchen appliances are white, son." :thumbsup:



    Thanks for sticking with it.... you get a laugh from me in the end :thumbsup: rep left

    Original Poster

    Broxy;2924106

    How about this video of a wall being wrecked by a … How about this video of a wall being wrecked by a chav.http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1UgAARkpwLg



    seen it before..... sorry :-(

    Feeling better now?

    how many irishmen does it take to change a lightbulb?????



    100
    1 to hold the screw while th other 99 turn the wall

    midlandscomics;2924076

    LMAO..... rep left (deserves two lots of rep this if I'm honest :-D)bless … LMAO..... rep left (deserves two lots of rep this if I'm honest :-D)bless you :?not bad, not laughter material though :thumbsup:Didn't do it for me the first time :-(




    awww fankoo fankoo xxx lol

    what about?

    A man was sunbathing naked, he covered his privates when he saw a little girl
    he told her he was hiding a bird, she left and he fell asleep
    later he woke up in hospital
    in agony and didnt know what had happened
    the little girl came to visit him
    she said
    "while you were asleep, i played with your bird
    but
    it spat at me :?
    so i broke its neck, burnt the nest,
    and crushed its fookin eggs!!!!"

    LOL

    alnbowes;2924147

    how many irishmen does it take to change a lightbulb?????100 1 to hold … how many irishmen does it take to change a lightbulb?????100 1 to hold the screw while th other 99 turn the wall


    :thumbsup::-D
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