Making a baby

    Making a baby.

    There is not one dirty word in
    it, and it is funny!--

    The Smiths were unable to
    conceive children and decided to
    use a surrogate father to start
    their family. On the day the
    proxy father was to arrive, Mr.
    Smith kissed his wife goodbye and
    said, 'Well, I'm off now. The man
    should be here soon.'

    Half an hour later, just by
    chance, a door-to-door baby
    photographer happened to ring the
    doorbell, hoping to make a sale.
    'Good morning, Ma'am', he said,
    'I've come to...'

    'Oh, no need to explain,' Mrs..
    Smith cut in, embarrassed, 'I've
    been expecting you.'

    'Have you really?' said the
    photographer. 'Well, that's good.
    Did you know babies are my

    'Well that's what my husband and
    I had hoped. Please come in and
    have a seat'.

    After a moment she asked,
    blushing, 'Well, where do we

    'Leave everything to me. I
    usually try two in the bathtub,
    one on the couch, and perhaps a
    couple on the bed. And sometimes
    the living room floor is fun. You
    can really spread out there.'

    'Bathtub, living room floor? No
    wonder it didn't work out for
    Harry and me!'

    'Well, Ma'am, none of us can
    guarantee a good one every time.
    But if we try several different
    positions and I shoot from six or
    seven angles, I'm sure you'll be
    pleased with the results.'

    'My, that's a lot!', gasped Mrs.

    'Ma'am, in my line of work a man
    has to take his time. I'd love to
    be In and out in five minutes,
    but I'm sure you'd be
    disappointed with that.'

    'Don't I know it,' said Mrs.
    Smith quietly.

    The photographer opened his
    briefcase and pulled out a
    portfolio of his baby pictures.
    'This was done on the top of a
    bus,' he said.

    'Oh, my God!' Mrs. Smith
    exclaimed, grasping at her

    'And these twins turned out
    exceptionally well - when you
    consider their mother was so
    difficult to work with.'

    'She was difficult?' asked Mrs.

    'Yes, I'm afraid so. I finally
    had to take her to the park to
    get the job done right. People
    were crowding around four and
    five deep to get a good look'

    'Four and five deep?' said Mrs.
    Smith, her eyes wide with

    'Yes', the photographer replied.
    'And for more than three hours,
    too. The mother was constantly
    squealing and yelling - I could
    hardly concentrate, and when
    darkness approached I had to rush
    my shots. Finally, when the
    squirrels began nibbling on my
    equipment, I just had to pack it
    all in.'

    Mrs. Smith leaned forward. 'Do
    you mean they actually chewed on

    'It's true, Ma'am, yes.. Well, if
    you're ready, I'll set-up my
    tripod and we can get to work
    right away.'


    'Oh yes, Ma'am. I need to use a
    tripod to rest my Canon on. It's
    much too big to be held in the
    hand very long.'
    Mrs. Smith fainted



    LMAO - thank you!


    i really did lol


    very good LMAO

    very funny




    very good, shame about the formatting but made me laugh :thumbsup:

    really funny

    thank you made me giggle xx

    and that's why I gave up door to door baby photo's:-D

    funny martin :-D:-D
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