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    Morning All, What can i do.

    Right i have a dilemma with the love life. My OH has been contacted by one of his ex, this person has hated me since day one and says i have stolen him from her. This was more then 5 years ago.

    She gets in contact at least once a year asking if i am still with him, She gets the same answer every year and normally stops talking to him but this time round she is will him with all her sympathy stories and about how horrible her life is. I no i can trust my OH but she is now constantly texting him and we never have a day that she's not txting him, My Oh is to kind for his on good and feels bad just ignoring her but its really annoying me now. I feel like she is stocking him.

    Ok rant over !!

    83 Comments

    I'd change his mobile number for one and ignore any other means of communications she is trying.
    Think she needs a reality check afetr all thsi time,he isnt interested she should give up!!

    good luck its a difficult situation for you x

    Kill her. Destroying the brain is the only way.

    get your OH to change his phone number :thumbsup:

    Banned

    Kill it with fire

    http://www.dan-jackson.com/smilies/burn.gif

    Banned

    [email protected];3976988

    Kill her. Destroying the brain is the only way.


    loooooooooooooooooooool



    Sounds like she needs help tbh...she got depression/mental health probs at all?

    Original Poster

    Mardyass;3976985

    I'd change his mobile number for one and ignore any other means of … I'd change his mobile number for one and ignore any other means of communications she is trying.Think she needs a reality check afetr all thsi time,he isnt interested she should give up!!good luck its a difficult situation for you x



    nicki3668;3976995

    get your OH to change his phone number :thumbsup:



    I have suggested this but he now feels sorry for her and thinks she just want someone to speak to and she will eventually go away.:x

    Banned

    [email protected];3976988

    Kill her. Destroying the brain is the only way.



    +1

    Or a less violent way would be to politely ask her to stop contacting him.

    Original Poster

    ODB_69;3977004

    looooooooooooooooooooolSounds like she needs help tbh...she got … looooooooooooooooooooolSounds like she needs help tbh...she got depression/mental health probs at all?



    Not yet but if i ever met her she will.

    Banned

    BlondeBella;3977012

    Not yet but if i ever met her she will.



    Thats the spirit!!

    Banned

    BlondeBella;3977012

    Not yet but if i ever met her she will.


    I know what you mean but she may have an actual problem and cant let him go...ask the ex if she has ever said anything about mental health or owt before...may have cropped up in the past

    http://images.huffingtonpost.com/2008-05-14-images-boxing_girls_thumb.jpg

    Original Poster

    ODB_69;3977040

    I know what you mean but she may have an actual problem and cant let him … I know what you mean but she may have an actual problem and cant let him go...ask the ex if she has ever said anything about mental health or owt before...may have cropped up in the past



    He has never mentioned it before as we used to talk about her when we first met and he never said she has a problem when i was b******* about her and i think he would of as he is too kindo for his on good.

    Some people cling on to things which they should really have let go a LONG time ago.

    I would speak to her yourself, phone her and ask her, cooly and calmly without getting angry, to stop contacting your OH as you're in a stable, happy, long-term relationship and that will not change.

    Original Poster

    Predikuesi;3977047



    I don't think i will need the gloves the make the hit to soft :lol:

    Original Poster

    chrishill;3977065

    Some people cling on to things which they should really have let go a … Some people cling on to things which they should really have let go a LONG time ago.I would speak to her yourself, phone her and ask her, cooly and calmly without getting angry, to stop contacting your OH as you're in a stable, happy, long-term relationship and that will not change.



    I have tried the cooly and camly approach a few years ago and that did nothing. This is why i am at wits end with it.

    Original Poster

    jellybaby22;3977085

    I would tell him..if he texts her again you will break his … I would tell him..if he texts her again you will break his fingers.....then ..if he does....break them...no serious.....tell him to stop it...I know you think he is doing it to be nice or whatever...but.....where do you draw the line...OR...get his phone and you text her.....



    Yeah been there done that all blown out of proportion and it coming back to me not trusting him and that he is only been a shoulder to cry on, we got somewhere yesterday tho think he noticed that she was just going for the sympathy so we will see how tonight goes.

    I think you need to tell your OH that he isn't helping her by replying to her texts etc. This will give her a glimmer of hope that he still cares about her and she will use this situation to manipulate things between you and him.
    She will be totally aware that it is causing hassle and as long as he keeps replying she will keep trying to cause a rift. What you don't want to happen is that you get so annoyed about her texting him that he starts to hide the fact that he is still talking to her , to save getting any hassle from you, thats when the problems start!

    Original Poster

    Spooki;3977150

    I think you need to tell your OH that he isn't helping her by replying to … I think you need to tell your OH that he isn't helping her by replying to her texts etc. This will give her a glimmer of hope that he still cares about her and she will use this situation to manipulate things between you and him. She will be totally aware that it is causing hassle and as long as he keeps replying she will keep trying to cause a rift. What you don't want to happen is that you get so annoyed about her texting him that he starts to hide the fact that he is still talking to her , to save getting any hassle from you, thats when the problems start!



    This is what i am worried about, it is making me ill i haven't eaten properly in 3 days. I should prob say this to him but i don't know how he will react.

    Original Poster

    tinkerbell28;3977214

    You need to tell him, otherwise it will make you feel worse than you … You need to tell him, otherwise it will make you feel worse than you already do and that's not a good thing for you or your relationship.At the end of the day whos feeling are more important to him, yours or hers that's what it comes down too and it's an answer you will find out either way.



    Yeah, i think i will tell him tonight. Best diet in the worl 7lbs in 3days. I did ask him yesterday who was more important adn told me me straight away so i think i will just say if im more important you need to stop texting her as its making me ill.

    Geez, tell him how its making you feel. You should be more important to him than some bint with issues.

    Drop his phone in the bath and say "Whoopsy darling, my bad. lets get you a nice new one"

    Nick his phone...and text her sayin shes a waste fo space and to f off and leave..

    Banned

    ChipSticks;3977259

    Geez, tell him how its making you feel. You should be more important to … Geez, tell him how its making you feel. You should be more important to him than some bint with issues. Drop his phone in the bath and say "Whoopsy darling, my bad. lets get you a nice new one"



    sim cards aren't affected by water unless they rust

    vengod;3977271
    Nick his phone...and text her sayin shes a waste fo space and to f off and leave..


    Not a bad idea... lol only i'd say something that she will believe is from him..

    "please stop texting me, I've moved on and am very happy in my relationship, I don't want you back, never have, never will. sorry."

    lumoruk;3977275

    sim cards aren't affected by water unless they rust



    Bugga. Erm, drop the sim card into acid first? lol

    vengod;3977271

    Nick his phone...and text her sayin shes a waste fo space and to f off … Nick his phone...and text her sayin shes a waste fo space and to f off and leave..



    lol!! seriously though, this person needs to get her own life. until she does or until he is firm with her, she will continue to pester him.

    You don't want to contact her or speak to her as then she will know she is causing major problems between you. After 5 yrs you should be able to be honest and open with him and tell him that this isn't right and how would he feel if this was happening to you and it was your ex that was hassling you. I bet he would feel different then.
    There really isn't any contest between her and you as he is with you and has been with you for 5 yrs.
    Yes, we all know it will be an ego boost for him, guys like this sort of thing, but he won't understand how much this is affecting you unless you put him straight.

    Remember, men don't think like us, they think the fact that they are with us is enough to prove their love and don't realise that this type of thing is a big deal to us! The other thing that scares us girls, is that we know how manipulative we can be

    Original Poster

    Spooki;3977339

    You don't want to contact her or speak to her as then she will know she … You don't want to contact her or speak to her as then she will know she is causing major problems between you. After 5 yrs you should be able to be honest and open with him and tell him that this isn't right and how would he feel if this was happening to you and it was your ex that was hassling you. I bet he would feel different then. There really isn't any contest between her and you as he is with you and has been with you for 5 yrs.Yes, we all know it will be an ego boost for him, guys like this sort of thing, but he won't understand how much this is affecting you unless you put him straight. Remember, men don't think like us, they think the fact that they are with us is enough to prove their love and don't realise that this type of thing is a big deal to us! The other thing that scares us girls, is that we know how manipulative we can be



    This is exactly the problem i no myself how much females can manipulate men as i used to do it all the time. I also no you never tell a guy all your life story unless your looking for the sympathy vote. This is the main reason i no she is up to no good.

    Ok you want the truth?...............

    Obvo your bloke aint as straight down the line as you think (mans perspective here remember) if some bint was bothering me by text and sticking her beak in and i wanted it to stop.....i would a) change my number or b) ring phone company to block her.......... c) completely ignore texts and dont even open them so she knows they aint been read on the status delivery thing fones have....people dont text unless they get replies.

    UNLESS.......... i secretley enjoyed the attention of it then i would leave it happen as your man is :thumbsup:

    Original Poster

    kungfu;3977493

    Ok you want the truth?...............Obvo your bloke aint as straight … Ok you want the truth?...............Obvo your bloke aint as straight down the line as you think (mans perspective here remember) if some bint was bothering me by text and sticking her beak in and i wanted it to stop.....i would a) change my number or b) ring phone company to block her.......... c) completely ignore texts and dont even open them so she knows they aint been read on the status delivery thing fones have....people dont text unless they get replies.UNLESS.......... i secretley enjoyed the attention of it then i would leave it happen as your man is :thumbsup:



    Yeah this is what i think the case maybe as he never really goes out and doesn't speak to many females so i do think he is enjoying someone else attention rather than boringold me.

    BlondeBella;3977382

    This is exactly the problem i no myself how much females can manipulate … This is exactly the problem i no myself how much females can manipulate men as i used to do it all the time. I also no you never tell a guy all your life story unless your looking for the sympathy vote. This is the main reason i no she is up to no good.



    Wrong, a man cannot be manipulated away from the woman he loves, he will do things willingly only :thumbsup:

    BlondeBella;3977509

    Yeah this is what i think the case maybe as he never really goes out and … Yeah this is what i think the case maybe as he never really goes out and doesn't speak to many females so i do think he is enjoying someone else attention rather than boringold me.



    Then you gotta bring the smackdown and say right.....'sim card in the bin' , i dont blame the other woman for trying..i dont blame your bloke for loving attention.......so where does that lay the blame for whats happening?(blame is a strong word soz but you tolerating it is allowing it to continue) Men get away with what they are allowed to. Your call now.

    Original Poster

    jellybaby22;3977543

    +1.....was thinking that...cos to be honest if someone was texting me and … +1.....was thinking that...cos to be honest if someone was texting me and I didnt want them too its pretty easy to sort it..change your number or tell them to F off.....Aww Im sure your not boring.......think you should just tell him how its making you feel hun xthen if he carries on ..you know where you stand xxxx :friends:



    Yeah thats true, but i think the worst thing is do i really want to know where i stand as he is all i have ever know since school it would be back to square one. That scares me and thats why i think i have been letting it happen.

    BlondeBella;3977597

    Yeah thats true, but i think the worst thing is do i really want to know … Yeah thats true, but i think the worst thing is do i really want to know where i stand as he is all i have ever know since school it would be back to square one. That scares me and thats why i think i have been letting it happen.





    get a grip. are you happy with whats happening? if so carry on, but as youve posted on a forum about it i suspect youre deeply unhappy about it..... already theres been sound advice on how you can stop it happening, if your man says he wont take measure to stop her texting then you got a strong life choice to make, this aint as hard a prob as youre making it.

    Original Poster

    kungfu;3977664

    get a grip. are you happy with whats happening? if so carry on, but as … get a grip. are you happy with whats happening? if so carry on, but as youve posted on a forum about it i suspect youre deeply unhappy about it..... already theres been sound advice on how you can stop it happening, if your man says he wont take measure to stop her texting then you got a strong life choice to make, this aint as hard a prob as youre making it.



    No im not happy but i wouldn't know where to start. Oh well it looks like im going to have to bite the bullet and deal with it. One way or another i can't take this anymore.

    Its the hardest thing in the world to ask for the honest truth when you know you may not want to hear it. But, you can't carry on being scared of the truth, if you do then you will always be wondering about things.
    Once a person knows you are scared of asking the truth, you then open doors for them to be untruthful as they can lie to you and you won't question it.
    It does really sound like he is using it as an ego boost, get yourself all dressed up and pounce on him when he gets home and make him realise that its you that boosts his ego and not some Ex. Also remind him that she is an Ex for a reason.........

    jellybaby22;3977703

    again +1I think I love you......:-DI thought you were male..surely … again +1I think I love you......:-DI thought you were male..surely not...men dont usually make this much sense :whistling:



    haha all male here..rah!!! :viking:


    Spooki;3977721

    It does really sound like he is using it as an ego boost, get … It does really sound like he is using it as an ego boost, get yourself all dressed up and pounce on him when he gets home and make him realise that its you that boosts his ego and not some Ex.



    nooooo , that would only prove that when he does things like this you get jealous and clingy.

    Try this.....

    Casually mention that your last boyfriend has added you on face book and lives close by , could be a good 'in' to get the convo started

    Original Poster

    jellybaby22;3977696

    I know how you feel ..recently went through something kind of … I know how you feel ..recently went through something kind of similar......but starting over isnt actually that bad.......:thumbsup:you need to speak to him...let him know you are not happy ...then if he carries on texting her...you kinda know where you stand.......



    Ok well you better be here for me to cry on your shoulder if it goes the bad way as o think i will need a day of ice cream and chocolate :lol:

    kungfu;3977725

    haha all male here..rah!!! :viking:nooooo , that would only prove that … haha all male here..rah!!! :viking:nooooo , that would only prove that when he does things like this you get jealous and clingy.Try this.....Casually mention that your last boyfriend has added you on face book and lives close by , could be a good 'in' to get the convo started





    But, then aren't you just encouraging her to play tit for tat? That will lead into problems...

    Isnt Quackstar still looking for a girlfriend?? He dont seem fussy he might like the stalker type send her his way!!

    Banned

    isnt this the same person you fell in love with? It seems so and yet you want him to change. Having feelings aint a bad thing, especially for a bloke, it seems his honesty and his caring nature is getting him into bother, just be careful what you change him into

    Original Poster

    bailey2k4;3977800

    Isnt Quackstar still looking for a girlfriend?? He dont seem fussy he … Isnt Quackstar still looking for a girlfriend?? He dont seem fussy he might like the stalker type send her his way!!



    Well if he would like a stalker type with two kids he is more than welcome to her.
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