New inventions by blondes

8 replies
Found 1st Apr 2008
The water-proof towel
Glow in the dark sunglasses
Solar powered flashlights
Submarine screen doors
A book on how to read
Inflatable dart boards
A dictionary index
Powdered water
Pedal powered wheel chairs
Water proof tea bags
Watermelon seed sorter
Zero proof alchohol
Reusable ice cubes
See through tiolet tissue
Skinless bananas
Do it yourself roadmap
Helicopter ejector seat

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8 Comments

Original Poster

Why studying is better than sex:

10. You can usually find someone to do it with.

9. If you get tired, you can stop, save your place and pick up where you left off.

8. You can finish early without feelings of guilt or shame.

7. When you open a book, you don’t have to worry about who else has opened it.

6. A little coffee and you can do it all night.

5. If you don’t finish a chapter you won’t gain a reputation as a “book teaser.”

4. You can do it, eat and watch T.V. all at the same time.

3. You don’t get embarrassed if your parents interrupt you in the middle.

2. You don’t have to put your beer down to do it.

1. If you aren’t sure what you’re doing, you can always ask your roommate for help.

Original Poster

Signs that you are drunk:

1. You lose arguments with inanimate objects.

2. You have to hold on to the lawn to keep from falling off the earth.

3. Your job starts to interfere with your drinking.

4. Your doctor finds traces of blood in your alcohol stream.

5. The back of your head keeps getting hit by the toilet seat.

6. You sincerely believe alcohol is the elusive 5th food group.

7. 24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case Coincidence?!?!?

8. Two hands and just one mouth now THAT'S a drinking problem.

9. Every woman you see has an exact twin.

10. You fall off the floor

11. Hey, 5 beers have just as many calories as a burger, screw dinner!

12. Your idea of cutting back is less salt.

13. Every night you're beginning to find your neighbours cat more and more attractive

14. I'm not drunk you're just sober!!

15. Ugly Betty looks good

16. You don't recognise your wife unless seen from the bottom of a glass.

17. That dammned pink elephant followed me home again.

18. You have a reserved parking space at the liquor store.

19. You've fallen and can't get up.

20. The shrubbery's drunk too, from frequent watering.

Sheriff Waffles;1817791

2. You don’t have to put your beer down to do it.4. You can do it, eat a … 2. You don’t have to put your beer down to do it.4. You can do it, eat and watch T.V. all at the same time.8. You can finish early without feelings of guilt or shame.



That's what's good about sex! :whistling:

Banned

Actually some of those inventions would make sense,
A reusable ice cube for instance that carries on making your drink cold, and they already do solar powered torches, well it charges the battery during the day.

i would love a water melon seed sorter lol

lol..

Sheriff Waffles;1817791

Helicopter ejector seat



these exist so well done the blondes

Sheriff Waffles;1817813

Helicopter Ejector Seat


guerilla;1818941

these exist so well done the blondes


Yes...so do these
lumoruk;1817961

A reusable ice cube for instance that carries on making your drink cold


little plastic cubes (actually come in all sorts of shapres and colours) that you pop in your drink, and when the have "melted/defrosted" you wash them and pop them back into your freezer, ready for next time.
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