One to make the ladies laugh ( only they will understand )

Found 10th Mar 2008
I've just been sent this by a friend of mine and it made me litterally laugh out loud which is something I dont do enough of lately, just thought it might give a few others a giggle.

Pregnancy, Oestrogen and Women
Pregnancy Q & A & more!

Q: Should I have a baby after 35?
A: No, 35 children is enough.

Q: I'm two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?
A: With any luck, right after he finishes university.

Q: What is the most reliable method to determine a baby's sex?
A: Childbirth.

Q: My wife is five months pregnant and so moody that sometimes she's borderline irrational.
A: So what's your question?

Q: My childbirth instructor says it's not pain I'll feel during labour, but pressure. Is she right?
A: Yes, in the same way that a tornado might be called an air current.

Q: When is the best time to get an epidural? A: Right after you find out you're pregnant.

Q: Is there any reason I have to be in the delivery room while my wife is in labour?
A: Not unless the word 'divorce' means anything to you.

Q: Is there anything I should avoid while recovering from childbirth?
A: Yes, pregnancy.

Q: Do I have to have a baby shower?
A: Not if you change the baby's nappy very quickly.

Q: Our baby was born last week. When will my wife begin to feel and act normal again?
A: When the kids are in university.


1. Everyone around you has an attitude problem.
2. You're adding chocolate to your cheese omelette.
3. The dryer has shrunk every last pair of your jeans.
4. Your husband is suddenly agreeing to everything you say.
5. You're using your mobile phone to dial up every car sticker that says: 'How's my driving-call 0800-'.
6. Everyone's head looks like an invitation to batting practice.
7. Everyone seems to have just landed here from 'outer space'.
8 You can't believe they don't make a tampon bigger than Super Plus.
9 You're sure that everyone is scheming to drive you crazy.
10. The ibuprofen bottle is empty and you bought it yesterday..


10. Cats' facial expressions.
9. The need for the same style of shoes in different colours.
8. Why bean sprouts aren't just weeds.
7. Fat clothes.
6 Taking a car trip without trying to beat your best time.
5. The difference between beige, ecru, cream, off-white and eggshell.
4. Cutting your hair to make it grow.
3. Eyelash curlers.
2. The inaccuracy of every bathroom scale ever made.

AND, the Number One thing only women understand :

Community Updates
MiscWomen Fashion
very good
hit quote instead of edit, dozzy me
You're using your mobile phone to dial up every car sticker that says: 'How's my driving-call 0800-'.


You're using your mobile phone to dial up every car sticker that says: … You're using your mobile phone to dial up every car sticker that says: 'How's my driving-call 0800-'.lol!

yes!!! (but only the intention because by the time you've stoppped, got pen & paper to write down the plate number,which you're now not sure you've remembered properly, done the shopping, got home, had a cup of tea and reached for the phone ....)
Very good. xx
He he he, very funny, enjoyed reading this!
Yep me too, some classic quotes there, thanks OP !
Fantastic, emailing to missus for when she gets back from college...
reminded me of that classic...what's the best thing for a hangover?...too much drink the night before.
lol! Greatness, had me laughing too :-D
that was so funny : thumbsup:
:thumbsup:that was so funny
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